Car owning idiocy thread ×341

[Drago]

Had my early morning walk around the village with muttley. One thing stuck me is that most cars are parked outside, despite almost every house here in Poshville having a garage. Some are so bone idle the effort of turning the steering wheel and parking on the driveway is too much hard work, so they dump it In the road and inflict it upon the rest of us. In this cold frosty weather that means a dawn chorus of crunch-crunch-crunch as people defrost them.

Now, this puzzles me. Most people in that situation don't put their cars in the garage because they're lazy. Over time the garage fills up with worthless tat, so the expensive car has no choice but to live outside.

Conversely, the scraping of car windows requires great effort, the polar opposite of being lazy. Therefore, if you're of the can't-be-arrised disposition it surely requires less effort to put a car in a garage at night than it does to scrape it in the morning?

So it seems car drivers aren't even any good at being lazy. Over time they've become so lazy that they've tripped across the laziness event horizon and they're now having to expend effort at being lazy. This is thoroughly painful to my brain, and is conclusive proof that the car driving masses have well and truly lost the plot.

 

[wheresthetorch]

But if I put my car in the garage, where will I put all the bicycles?

 

[Dirk]

I've got a drive and a garage but leave my car out on the road.
I own the road, so there's no problem.
I solve the frost scraping problem by not getting up until the sun has melted it. Sometimes that means lying in until 11am, but hey ho, it's a small sacrifice.

 

[welsh dragon]

I put my car in the garage, but even if i didn't, i would never scrape it myself. I would simply send Mr WD out to do it...

 

[Oldfentiger]

I used to work for a Spanish company - we imported industrial gearboxes and flogged them around the UK.
In Spain they had an arm of the company which produced door automation products. This part of the company generated almost 50% of their turnover.
Drive around Spain or Italy and you see see door automation products everywhere. Most factories have a barrier of some some sort. Most shops have roller shutters to protect them. Most houses and apartments have roller shutters over the windows.
Most people put cars in their garage, and have a garage door operator.
So - they tried to encourage me to add the door automation stuff to our product portfolio. They didn't believe me when I told them it wouldn't meet with the same success in the UK. I invited them over, drove them round a bit, and they were gobsmacked that us lot leave our cars outside. As an aside, they thought I could establish their door automation range in the UK without any marketing input on their part.
To most people over here, the garage is an additional room to the house, particularly useful for storing junk.

 

[Arjimlad]

My wife sends me out with an extension cable and a small fan heater to put into the car. That way the engine's not left running and the whole thing is toasty warm when she gets in it.

 

[Salty seadog]

My wife sends me out with an extension cable and a small fan heater to put into the car. That way the engine's not left running and the whole thing is toasty warm when she gets in it.

You lucky boy you

 

[Beebo]

I dont have a garage but if i did i doubt i would use it for a car.
It has to be quite wide in order for it to be big enough to open both doors, most garages in UK are simply too small to get a car in without bashing the sides.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

New build houses tend to be built with garages just big enough to drive a small car into - but not big enough to open the door once you're in.

 

[Joey Shabadoo]

snap

 

[Blue Hills]

My wife sends me out with an extension cable and a small fan heater to put into the car. That way the engine's not left running and the whole thing is toasty warm when she gets in it.

Do you lick the steering wheel clean for her as well? Then finish off with the pedals?

 

[Drago]

But if I put my car in the garage, where will I put all the bicycles?

I manage ok.

 

[Nigel-YZ1]

In the Chipping Norton of the North (Penistone), there's lots of garages at the back of houses, so the cars are left by the kerb at the front. Then there's the dilemma of where they put their second car, because some have two turbo Cayennes. Yes the second car has to go on the road too.
But here's the problem. The people across the road need to parade their wealth-mobile too. So they park across the road with their turbo Overfinch Range Rover Sport.
The result is great swathes of single lane road that was narrow to start with.
Oh and this road is a bus route. Bugger.
Doesn't matter, the bus driver just spends 20 minutes on every loop sitting waiting for people to put down their half fat three shot capuccino latte with sprinkles for long enough to come out and give him an unwelcoming glance before moving the turbo 6 inches further on to the kerb.

 

[I like Skol]

@Drago you are barely scraping the surface of the idiocy and laziness that seems to go hand in hand with car ownership for many.

Just last night I witnessed an even more incredible display of stupidity and idleness.

A car driver had stopped on the main road so his mate could run into the bookies. It is a busy road with 2 lanes in each direction and it was in rush hour. Obviously stopping there at that time was going to be a problem, so he pulled half onto the pavement, which still resulted in the busy road being cut down to 1 lane. He was also on the zigzags leading to a pedestrian crossing, but that clearly wasn't bothering him.

If he had driven a further 40-50 yards he could have turned into an empty side street and parked up without causing any obstruction or risk. I just wish there was more police so they could deal with sh1t like this. Tearing up his licence and crushing his car would be a good start!

 

[glasgowcyclist]

My neighbours have a driveway big enough for two cars. They have a huge garage, big enough for two cars. They have two cars. Both cars are permanently parked on the pavement, one outside their house and the other in front of mine. Fark knows why.

I have a garage big enough for one car but is currently storing all my bikes and all my wife's gardening equipment. I have a drive big enough for two cars. I have one car and it lives on the driveway.

In the winter months it lives right up to the garage door and alongside the house, enjoying good frost protection at this time of year and saves me scraping the windows.

I get that some people use their garage for other things but why ignore a perfectly ample driveway?