Bamboozling door to door salesmen

[Arch]

There was just a knock at the door. Answered it, to be greeted by a young chap who started to promote the benefits of Sky. I told him I was only house sitting.

"Oh, what time will they be home?".

"In about 2 weeks"

"Oh. Well, tell them to look at the benefits of Sky..."

"Probaby not much good. They don't have a telly"

Defeated!

 

[mangaman]

I thought you were going to tell a story about salesmen selling bamboozling, door-to-door.

I'm on the look out for a bamboozle if anyone knows where I can get one cheap

 

[BigonaBianchi]

have a heart, anybody out door knocking in this weather needs a break.

 

[Sh4rkyBloke]

There was just a knock at the door. Answered it, to be greeted by a young chap who started to promote the benefits of Sky. I told him I was only house sitting.

"Oh, what time will they be home?".

"In about 2 weeks"

"Oh. Well, tell them to look at the benefits of Sky..."

"Probaby not much good. They don't have a telly"

Defeated!

You should have pointed out that technically it's not the Sky they should be looking at in terms of its benefits... now the atmosphere, with all that air making it breathable... a much more useful commodity..

 

[rich p]

have a heart, anybody out door knocking in this weather needs a break.

Even JW's?

 

[TVC]

My old standby:

Them -"Hello, don't worry I'm not trying to sell you anything"

Me - "I'm not worried, I'm not going to buy anything"

Check mate in one line.

 

[Sh4rkyBloke]

 

[Arch]

have a heart, anybody out door knocking in this weather needs a break.

Not here in York - not a flake of snow left, and a clear blue sky.

 

[Mr Pig]

A mate of mine's dad got a call from a conservatory company one day. He said:

"A conservatory would be great but I don't think I could get one"

"Why not?"

"Because I don't think you could fit a conservatory to this house"

"Our reps can advise you about that once they've seen it"

"Honestly, I think they'd be wasting their time"

"You can do a lot these days, it would be best to let them advise you"

"Well if you like, tell me about the conservatories then?"

Girl blabs on for ten minutes about the brilliant conservatories they sell then says "So would you like to arrange a time for a representative to call round?"

"Sure" and a time is booked.

"Thank you very much Mr McKnight, our rep will see you soon"

"And thank you dear, I'm really looking forward to seeing how your rep proposes fitting a conservatory to a second story flat!"

 

[Twenty Inch]

Couple of evangelists rang the door bell once.

Them: "Would you be interested in coming to our church?"

Me: "No. Christianity is a death cult, accepting suffering on earth in return for the afterlife, which is morally apalling. Also, it's a linear, story-based religion, when human history and experience is clearly cyclical".

Them: "Oh. OK then."

 

[TVC]

Couple of evangelists rang the door bell once.

Them: "Would you be interested in coming to our church?"

Me: "No. Christianity is a death cult, accepting suffering on earth in return for the afterlife, which is morally apalling. Also, it's a linear, story-based religion, when human history and experience is clearly cyclical".

Them: "Oh. OK then."

I'm not that clever, I just say "No thanks, I'm not superstitious"

 

[Black Sheep]

"we're atheists, we don't want double glazing and we went down the library last week and memorised the encyclopedia"

i'll be impressed if anyone can tell me where thats from...

 

[snapper_37]

We have a couple of JWs a door down, lovely people I might add.

I was cutting the grass last year and Jack came out and said he wanted to talk to me. No problem, we had some 'how are you' business. He said that although we are 'nice girls' we could be 'cured'.

I didn't know what to say and kept on cutting. He kept on going.

So, I put the mower down, unplugged it and said 'Cure me then, because I'd rather a bloke did this than me'.

We stood for 10 minutes, but no George Clooney with a strimmer appeared.

We still get the Watch Tower pushed through the letterbox. Good reading after a few.

 

[Gromit]

Yep had the same guy around here, no TV so don't bother...

 

[amasidlover]

British Gas Salesman comes to door...

Him: Can I check if we can save you money on your energy bills?

Me: I doubt it, I check pretty regularly.

[Shows me the latest rates]

Me: Wow, those are twice what we pay!

[Happen to have recent bill near the door, so grab it]

Him: Oh... I'll change ours when I get home. [Wanders off...]