# Can / SHOULD we fine cyclists for riding no handed? £5000 fine - seems low!!



## Alltalk (3 Jun 2016)

Filed under CAN there be a law to actually prosecute DM, local rag muppets and all motorists who speed, cut up cyclists, don't indicate, use their lights and use their phones when driving??

http://www.bournemouthecho.co.uk/yo...ists_riding_bikes_without_holding_handlebars/

I see so many "bike riders" every day that give every "cyclist" a bad name. Riding on the pavement when cycle paths available - but even when they may have to ride on the pavement for safety riding as if there is no pedestrian in the vicinity. Complete ninja bell ends that have to ride on the roads - when they have cycle or off road routes - but display NO lights front or rear.

Drives me insane when I am driving. It shouldn't and wouldn't - if these prckis kept themselves to themselves - without their lights. But 90% of the time they get in the road - and then mouth off if you may accidentally hit them.

Is it just me?...

We are NEVER going to get anywhere near cycle integration, in or out. 

Actual "cyclists" are considered as bad a paedo's - from my experience and The Daily Mail, The Sun, The Guardian and local rags.

People in the UK would rather put up with abysmal public transport and sitting in queues in cars on almost 3rd world roads.

T AWTS!!


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## growingvegetables (3 Jun 2016)




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## slowmotion (3 Jun 2016)




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## cosmicbike (3 Jun 2016)




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## snorri (3 Jun 2016)

Alltalk said:


> Is it just me?...


 Yes.


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## ufkacbln (3 Jun 2016)

Is the fine "lower" for recumbents?


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## subaqua (3 Jun 2016)

friday- Check
Popcorn- check
Beer- (later) check

ranty post- Check.


folks we have the makings of THE Friday thread here


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## Bill (3 Jun 2016)

Eeeerrrrrmmmmm, Alltalk......I ride on pavements when possible to escape stupid car drivers! Even though I wear a tabard with..."Disabled Cyclist" in black on the back I still have problems with fools driving like...fools...


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## shouldbeinbed (3 Jun 2016)

Alltalk said:


> Filed under CAN there be a law to actually prosecute DM, local rag muppets and all motorists who speed, cut up cyclists, don't indicate, use their lights and use their phones when driving??
> 
> http://www.bournemouthecho.co.uk/yo...ists_riding_bikes_without_holding_handlebars/
> 
> ...




take more water with it next time.


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## Karlt (3 Jun 2016)

Where to start?


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## ufkacbln (3 Jun 2016)

Karlt said:


> Where to start?



Where your bike is?


Works for me


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## gavintc (3 Jun 2016)

Alltalk said:


> Filed under CAN there be a law to actually prosecute DM, local rag muppets and all motorists who speed, cut up cyclists, don't indicate, use their lights and use their phones when driving??
> 
> http://www.bournemouthecho.co.uk/yo...ists_riding_bikes_without_holding_handlebars/
> 
> ...


missed your meds this morning?


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## outlash (3 Jun 2016)




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## AndyRM (3 Jun 2016)

The least the author could have done was provided a picture for the paper of one of the 7 cyclists riding with their hands off the bars!


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## deptfordmarmoset (3 Jun 2016)

Them unicyclists are the worst.


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## rugby bloke (3 Jun 2016)

I blame the TDF - all those stage winners riding over the finish line with their hands in the air - bloody irresponsible considering how many impressionable children and MAMILS are watching,


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## Jody (3 Jun 2016)

£5000 is the maximum fine given for careless driving and can't be applied to cyclists.

This comment sums the story up perfectly "Obviously been a bit quiet on the Echo's anti-cycling agenda so we'll print any old rubbish as click bait and see the comments come rolling in."

Move along, there's nothing to see!


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## Bollo (3 Jun 2016)

TAWT! is my new favourite insult.


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## shouldbeinbed (3 Jun 2016)

AndyRM said:


> The least the author could have done was provided a picture for the paper of one of the 7 cyclists riding with their hands off the bars!



If only they existed


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

@Alltalk 
It may help us to decipher the point of your post if you indicate in some way where your opinions begin and end, and which of the paragraphs are copied and pasted from the ill-informed ranty replies. As it is I'm not sure who I need to target with my pitchfork and blazing torch as I march on the citadel of blighted injustice. 

Do you hate the DM et al for giving these people column space, or the respondents for replying in their eloquent yet slightly non sequturial fashion?

Do you hate people on bikes somehow giving me a bad name by doing g something which is quite skilled, albeit with a dental/orthodontic risk?

Should we all have lights on all the time? Will that help us read and understand the Echo better?


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

As an aside, post of the year must go to the commentator who quotes the statistic that cyclists kill a mere 20% of those who meet their maker at the hands of car drivers.


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## Karlt (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> As an aside, post of the year must go to the commentator who quotes the statistic that cyclists kill a mere 20% of those who meet their maker at the hands of car drivers.



And cause as many serious injuries, don't forget that bit!


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## mythste (3 Jun 2016)

You'll only get a fine if you're not wearing a helmet. If you're wearing a helmet with no hands we all know no harm may come to you or those surrounding you.


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## mjr (3 Jun 2016)

Alltalk said:


> I see so many "bike riders" every day that give every "cyclist" a bad name. [...] Actual "cyclists" are considered as bad a paedo's


I particularly enjoyed the redefinition of cyclists as those who obey all rules, including some imaginary ones, then saying cyclists are as bad as paedos - so does that mean people shouldn't follow all rules?


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## Gravity Aided (3 Jun 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> Is the fine "lower" for recumbents?


If a beard, beer holder, and baseball cap are present.


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## jefmcg (3 Jun 2016)

gavintc said:


> missed your meds this morning?


The opposite, I think, as he was posting house music to the find-a-bargain thread at 3am 


Alltalk said:


> Nah - don't think I was by the time I replied. No code was available so I didn't miss out on a £6 or even £3 SKY branded bidon.
> 
> Dammit!!
> 
> ...


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## shouldbeinbed (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> As an aside, post of the year must go to the commentator who quotes the statistic that cyclists kill a mere 20% of those who meet their maker at the hands of car drivers.



Really? well if its in the paper it must be true.

I need to add a lance to my bike and start riding faster, blindfolded and on the pavement, I'm not killing or maiming nearly my share of the populace. 

Sorry to those of you that have been taking out great swathes of pedestrians on my behalf, I'll try to do my bit in future.


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## jefmcg (3 Jun 2016)

My favourite remark is that it's easy to do.


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## EnPassant (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> @Alltalk
> As it is I'm not sure who I need to target with my pitchfork and blazing torch as I march on the citadel of blighted injustice.




There is no way I'll avoid plagiarising this at some point.


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## Jody (3 Jun 2016)

jefmcg said:


> My favourite remark is that it's easy to do.



Because it is


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## ufkacbln (3 Jun 2016)

Gravity Aided said:


> If a beard, beer holder, and baseball cap are present.


 No Baseball cap


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## jefmcg (3 Jun 2016)

Jody said:


> Because it is


If you will pardon the tautology, it's easy for the people it is easy for, and not for those who it isn't. I learned to ride a bike as an adult, and it is still something I get on and ride. For some people who learnt as children, the bike is an extension of their body and they understand it's physics in a way I never will.


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

User14044mountain said:


> I'd pay £5000 to be able to ride no handed. Just don't seem to have the balance these days. More Sauvignon needed.


Or a pint of whatever the OP was having.


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

jefmcg said:


> The opposite, I think, as he was posting house music to the find-a-bargain thread at 3am


Actually, that would liven up an otherwise dull thread. If music hath charms to soothe the savage breast, perhaps a bit of Beethoven in the Helmet thread to soften rocks, or bend the occasional knotted oak?


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## Nigel-YZ1 (3 Jun 2016)

Well that's another massive threat to humanity highlighted. Tomorrow: Squirrels dropping nuts from trees!!


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## Absinthe Minded (3 Jun 2016)

User14044mountain said:


> It's at times like this, I miss Vernon's tales of absinthe drinking.


You called?


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## mjr (3 Jun 2016)

jefmcg said:


> For some people who learnt as children, the bike is an extension of their body and they understand it's physics in a way I never will.


Maybe not understand so much as having learned through experience how far it can be abused. The facefuls of gravel are worth missing, IMO.


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## jefmcg (3 Jun 2016)

mjray said:


> Maybe not understand so much as having learned through experience how far it can be abused. The facefuls of gravel are worth missing, IMO.


Well, yes. I was always a cautious child, so probably would not have mastered hands-free riding even if I had the opportunity.

Ironically, it was that caution that got me a broken elbow at the age of eight, that still troubles me today.


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## jefmcg (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> Or a pint of whatever the OP was having.


I think a pint of that would probably kill you


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## snorri (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> @Alltalk. As it is I'm not sure who I need to target with my pitchfork and blazing torch as I march on the citadel of blighted injustice.


A quote lifted from that notable publication "Quotes what I have spoken" by Jonathan Aitken?

Edit to delete Cecil Parkinson and insert Jonathan Aiken


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

snorri said:


> A quote lifted from that notable publication "Quotes what I have spoken" by Cecil Parkinson?


Do grammar Nazis endorse plagiarism? Discus.

It's possibly a circular argument.


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## Cubist (3 Jun 2016)

jefmcg said:


> Well, yes. I was always a cautious child, so probably would not have mastered hands-free riding even if I had the opportunity.
> 
> Ironically, it was that caution that got me a broken elbow at the age of eight, that still troubles me today.


To quote Ken Dodd
My teeth are the result of an experiment to see whether I could ride a bike blindfold. Apparently you can, at least as far as the nearest kerb.


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## snorri (3 Jun 2016)

Cubist said:


> Do grammar Nazis endorse plagiarism? Discus.
> It's possibly a circular argument.


Nah, there's no argument, a discus is circular and that's a fact.


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## Tim Hall (3 Jun 2016)

snorri said:


> A quote lifted from that notable publication "Quotes what I have spoken" by Cecil Parkinson?


Sounds more Aitkenesque to me, what with his sword of truth and trusty shield of British fair play. The liar.


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## snorri (3 Jun 2016)

Tim Hall said:


> Sounds more Aitkenesque to me, what with his sword of truth and trusty shield of British fair play. The liar.


Absolutely right sir, a fair cop.


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## Tin Pot (3 Jun 2016)

Bollo said:


> TAWT! is my new favourite insult.



You missed the bit I liked best, the space.

T AWT!!

Brilliant


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## Bollo (3 Jun 2016)

Tin Pot said:


> You missed the bit I liked best, the space.
> 
> T AWT!!
> 
> Brilliant


You're right. Comedy is in the details.


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## coco69 (3 Jun 2016)

Alltalk said:


> Filed under CAN there be a law to actually prosecute DM, local rag muppets and all motorists who speed, cut up cyclists, don't indicate, use their lights and use their phones when driving??
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Get a grip


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## classic33 (3 Jun 2016)

coco69 said:


> @GetAGrip


She's not here!


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## J1888 (4 Jun 2016)

coco69 said:


> Get a grip



Best pun of the thread so far


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## machew (4 Jun 2016)

As a "pedal cycle” means a unicycle, bicycle, tricycle, or cycle having four or more wheels, not being in any case mechanically propelled unless it is an electrically assisted pedal cycle of such class as is to be treated as not being a motor vehicle for the purposes of the 1984 Act.
If this "law" ever gets passed I propose a mass unicycle rally in Bournemouth everyone then hands themselves into the police and ask to be arrested as they have broken the the law.


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## jefmcg (4 Jun 2016)

User13710 said:


> I hope the OP is OK - they haven't been back since the OP.


Yeah, I want to make a light hearted remark, but damn, I hope s/he is ok.


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## Bazzer (4 Jun 2016)

User13710 said:


> I hope the OP is OK - they haven't been back since the OP.



Perhaps visited the Drs with blood pressure problems and told to stay off the road until the CBT appointment comes through?


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## coco69 (4 Jun 2016)

User13710 said:


> I hope the OP is OK - they haven't been back since the OP.



Now that dosnt surprise me WTF


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## Lonestar (4 Jun 2016)

J1888 said:


> Best pun of the thread so far



Nah the pun was in the OP.


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## jefmcg (4 Jun 2016)

User said:


> Mescaline, by the sound of it...


hence ...


jefmcg said:


> I think a pint of that would probably kill you


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## Pat "5mph" (4 Jun 2016)

Wot? If I learn to ride no handed I get £ 5,000? 
Can I borrow @Racing roadkill's full face helmet?


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## Racing roadkill (4 Jun 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> Wot? If I learn to ride no handed I get £ 5,000?
> Can I borrow @Racing roadkill's full face helmet?


Be my guest, it's knackered. Face planting a cats eye at 40 mph does that.


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## Globalti (6 Jun 2016)

Damn, I took my hands off the bars and rode 100 yards no-handed to stretch out yesterday. Where should I send the fine?


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## Profpointy (6 Jun 2016)

machew said:


> As a "pedal cycle” means a unicycle, bicycle, tricycle, or cycle having four or more wheels, not being in any case mechanically propelled unless it is an electrically assisted pedal cycle of such class as is to be treated as not being a motor vehicle for the purposes of the 1984 Act.
> If this "law" ever gets passed I propose a mass unicycle rally in Bournemouth everyone then hands themselves into the police and ask to be arrested as they have broken the the law.



A mate of mine was cycling his unicycle back in the day, and was stopped by a policeman who told him he couldn't cycle on the road. "why not", then a bit of a debate culminating with the policeman eventually deciding "because it doesn't have a front brake". At this point my mate rolled his eyes, snorted, and cycled off. The police put the whole question in the "too hard" basket from then on and didn't trouble him further. To be fair, the "lack of front brake" point may actually have been technically correct.

In a similar vein, the guy had a very very modified racing car mini which was just about road legal. To give you the picture, it looked normal from the bonnet to the windscreen, but behind that it was only 6" high bodywork with the seats screwed to this glorified tea tray as it were. When he first got it, he parked it outside the police station so they could all have a good look at it, and not stop him one at a time until each policeman in turn had given it the once over.


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## jefmcg (6 Jun 2016)

Globalti said:


> Where should I send the fine?


You have a PM.


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## shouldbeinbed (6 Jun 2016)

Profpointy said:


> A mate of mine was cycling his unicycle back in the day, and was stopped by a policeman who told him he couldn't cycle on the road. "why not", then a bit of a debate culminating with the policeman eventually deciding "because it doesn't have a front brake".
> 
> < snip>
> 
> To be fair, the "lack of front brake" point may actually have been technically correct.



to be fair it lacks a front wheel so maybe the point is moot. 

I suppose you could say that it has a coaster brake as ceasing to pedal performs a retarding function and meets the criteria of being both front and back wheel brake


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## Mugshot (6 Jun 2016)

Racing roadkill said:


> Be my guest, it's knackered. Face planting a cats eye at 40 mph does that.


Have you fallen off again?


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## machew (6 Jun 2016)

shouldbeinbed said:


> to be fair it lacks a front wheel so maybe the point is moot.
> 
> I suppose you could say that it has a coaster brake as ceasing to pedal performs a retarding function and meets the criteria of being both front and back wheel brake


http://www.unicycle.org.uk/uuu/faq/hampshirepolice.gif


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## jido (13 Jun 2016)

I have a question about riding no-handed.

I just got a new cycle, it is one of these "fixies" - I wanted to give a go to single speed cycling - and the front wheel will very easily go 180°. Despite that I tried no handed riding.

I find that riding no handed is a little incomfortable as I will feel the need to compensate to the right or to the left all the time.

I checked the wheels alignment and the seat alignment (and tightening!) and they seem good, do you know why that would happen? My thought is that I am not used to the seat yet and I am simply slipping off-centre. What do you think?


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## coco69 (13 Jun 2016)

I think its safe to say thst most of the members think...know he is talking through a hole in his arse.


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