# FNRttC Cardiff to Swansea - 6th July 2012



## dellzeqq (13 Jun 2012)

6th July. from the drama of the Millenium Basin to the quiet roads through Llantrythid and Llanmaes, through Llantwit Major and on to St. Donats, the sea so wonderfully lit up by the moon last year, and on through a steep sided valley and over cattle grids to Ewenny. West, north and up to Cefn Cross, and then through Margam to Neath, and down to Swansea via the wonderfully named Bog Road. A slightly longer, hillier route than last year, but the last five miles around the bay to Mumbles will soothe all the aches away.

Andy P
Adrian C
Jenny M
Kim W
Greg C
Marcus J
Sarah B
Hamish O
Keith P
Margaret P
Brian C
John C
Claudine C
Stuart A
Davy S
Guto E
Jan G
John R
Fionnulla C
John O
Susie F
Pete S
Kerry W
Peter A
Tim J
Simon M
Jono M
Chris W
John W
Gordon P
Olaf S?
Nick S
Nick D
Martin S
Raden D
User S
Miranda S
Graham D


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## theclaud (13 Jun 2012)

Is that two TMNs, on the basis that they won't take up an awful lot of space?


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## Davywalnuts (13 Jun 2012)

Super, been waiting for this ride to pop up for YONKS, and also for reasons that Adrian enquires above. 

Oh, and before I start, I still owe our leader £2 subs..

Ah, yes, so, chuffed as I was with lasts years ride, but sad I didn't do the night ride part, I have spoken to Teef and Long Martin about riding to the start, and back. But, not all the way back...So just putting it out there that I intend to ride from London, to Cardiff, mainly along the A4, nightride to Swansea, then train from Swansea to Bristol and then home, again along the A4, which, as its going back to London, is easy peasy as its all down hill..

The train part cuts out the Hills, as we all know I don't do Hills and would round off the journey to just over 300miles rather than closer to 400miles and will also help in the mental planning for next years LEL. 

Takers?


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## theclaud (13 Jun 2012)

Utterly Walnuts, Davy, but it will be good to see you on the ride.


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## clarion (13 Jun 2012)

Sadly, we won't be on this one.  Obligations...


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## Gordon P (13 Jun 2012)

theclaud said:


> Is that two TMNs, on the basis that they won't take up an awful lot of space?


And 2 of me as well!


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## StuAff (13 Jun 2012)

As mad as a box of frogs Davy, but definitely good prep for LEL.
Home-Cardiff Bay is 133 miles according to the route bikehike's given me, with about 8k feet of climbing. Or I could just use the £8 train ticket I've already booked...tough decision 
I do have a 200 mile ride planned, just not this one.....


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## Davywalnuts (13 Jun 2012)

StuAff said:


> As mad as a box of frogs Davy, but definitely good prep for LEL.
> Home-Cardiff Bay is 133 miles according to the route bikehike's given me, with about 8k feet of climbing. Or I could just use the £8 train ticket I've already booked...tough decision
> I do have a 200 mile ride planned, just not this one.....


 
I make it about 160ish miles to Cardiff from HPC, but currently mapping to even out the bumps, alot, so possibly around 5k climbing.. nothing really...


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## theclaud (13 Jun 2012)

Gordon P said:


> And 2 of me as well!


Bargain!


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## Aperitif (14 Jun 2012)

You need a nice tilt at Christmas Common again, Davy! I have a ticket back from Swansea on Saturday morning (I thought I had bought one!  ) as I need to show my face at work pm. My only problem is getting the time to ride it on the Friday now!
A tidy pace, reduce the grandiose lunch / stop times and, of course, no punctures. A flying visit from the Wing Walker of Malmesbury would be a nice diversion while 3pmses are taken in the square there. I would quite like to be in Cardiff with a few hours to spare as I need to do try and catch up with an old school teacher / rugbyman who was quite handy on a bicycle, for Wales, in the dim and distant past...Just my idle thoughts.


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## martint235 (14 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> I have spoken to Teef and Long Martin about riding to the start, and back. But, not all the way back...So just putting it out there that I intend to ride from London, to Cardiff, mainly along the A4, nightride to Swansea, then train from Swansea to Bristol and then home, again along the A4, which, as its going back to London, is easy peasy as its all down hill..


 Sorry Davy, we're on an annual leave ban in July/Aug/Sept for the Olympics so I can't be off work on the Friday. Considered getting the train down but seems too expensive.


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## theclaud (14 Jun 2012)

Aperitif said:


> You need a nice tilt at Christmas Common again, Davy!* I have a ticket back from Swansea on Saturday morning* (I thought I had bought one!  ) as I need to show my face at work pm. My only problem is getting the time to ride it on the Friday now!
> A tidy pace, reduce the grandiose lunch / stop times and, of course, no punctures. A flying visit from the Wing Walker of Malmesbury would be a nice diversion while 3pmses are taken in the square there. I would quite like to be in Cardiff with a few hours to spare as I need to do try and catch up with an old school teacher / rugbyman who was quite handy on a bicycle, for Wales, in the dim and distant past...Just my idle thoughts.


 
Not before beer o'clock, I hope?


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## theclaud (14 Jun 2012)

There's a bar close by the pier that served us early last year - the Pier Cafe itself is a bit of a family venue and can't chance it boozewise. Sea views n all that. Could be good if it's sunny.


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## StuAff (14 Jun 2012)

theclaud said:


> There's a bar close by the pier that served us early last year - the Pier Cafe itself is a bit of a family venue and can't chance it boozewise. Sea views n all that. Could be good if it's sunny.


Would that be up that lovely hill-climb?

By lovely I of course mean horrendous...


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## StuAff (14 Jun 2012)

Des would, though....


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## theclaud (14 Jun 2012)

Stu! Are you trying to undo all my diplomatic efforts??? It's a very short slope, with beer at the top. What's not to like?


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## StuAff (14 Jun 2012)

theclaud said:


> Stu! Are you trying to undo all my diplomatic efforts??? It's a very short slope, with beer at the top. What's not to like?


Terribly sorry. It is in fact a lovely, lovely, very short slope that isn't steep at all. With beer at the top for those that like it.

Better?


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## GrumpyGregry (14 Jun 2012)

StuAff said:


> Terribly sorry. It is in fact a lovely, lovely, very short slope that isn't steep at all. With beer at the top for those that like it.
> 
> Better? Bitter?


 
Yes please


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## Davywalnuts (14 Jun 2012)

TC me dear, could you kindly look at the below route and tell me what you think please? Not particually keen on doing the A48 all the way on from the big bridge. Thank you.

http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1316917


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## dellzeqq (14 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> TC me dear, could you kindly look at the below route and tell me what you think please? Not particually keen on doing the A48 all the way on from the big bridge. Thank you.
> 
> http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1316917


that's pretty much the route we took a couple of weeks ago. It's fine


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## Davywalnuts (14 Jun 2012)

dellzeqq said:


> that's pretty much the route we took a couple of weeks ago. It's fine


 
Super, thanks.


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## theclaud (14 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> TC me dear, could you kindly look at the below route and tell me what you think please? Not particually keen on doing the A48 all the way on from the big bridge. Thank you.
> 
> http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1316917



Wot DZ said.


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## mmmmartin (15 Jun 2012)

Listen up dudes, there's a nooo geezer joining you on this, he's called John O and he's sort of family, like. Innit. (Present Wifey's Goddaughter's Hubby). He's a fine fellow and I want you to make him as welcome as you normally do to nooo peeps. One thing. Don't dare mention the possibility of doing LEL. Oh no. Not at all. Mum's the word. Shhhh. OK?

oh, and beer. Don't mention that either. Nor ask him about owning a 'bent. Shhhh.

Alas I cannot do this as ride as I am being humiliated while running in the Lake District.

Er, that's it.


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## Wobblers (15 Jun 2012)

martint235 said:


> Sorry Davy, we're on an annual leave ban in July/Aug/Sept for the Olympics so I can't be off work on the Friday. Considered getting the train down but seems too expensive.


 
First Great Western charge an arm and a leg for anyone who has the effrontery to travel on one of their trains from Paddington or Reading on a Friday. It may work out cheaper if you break your journey at the first station after Reading (Didcot, I think). You could always cycle to Didcot, somehow I think that's not beyond your capabilities...


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## martint235 (15 Jun 2012)

McWobble said:


> First Great Western charge an arm and a leg for anyone who has the effrontery to travel on one of their trains from Paddington or Reading on a Friday. It may work out cheaper if you break your journey at the first station after Reading (Didcot, I think). You could always cycle to Didcot, somehow I think that's not beyond your capabilities...


Ooh there's an idea. I'll look into it. Cheers Andrew. Still stuck with working Friday though, I'll see.


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## Banjo (18 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> TC me dear, could you kindly look at the below route and tell me what you think please? Not particually keen on doing the A48 all the way on from the big bridge. Thank you.
> 
> http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1316917


 
I have ridden that route many times and its fine. when you get to Cardiff if its during the day Rover Way is best avoided (Lots of big potholes and HGVs thundering past you.)by going through the housing estate along Tweedsmuir Road .In the evening/night Rover Way is not so bad.(Only a short road anyway)

The A48 is fine as well all the way from Chepstow to Cardiff except it can be busy during rush hour around Newport and Cardiff when I would definitely use the Peterstone Wentlooge route you have plotted.


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## Davywalnuts (18 Jun 2012)

Banjo said:


> I have ridden that route many times and its fine. when you get to Cardiff if its during the day Rover Way is best avoided (Lots of big potholes and HGVs thundering past you.)by going through the housing estate along Tweedsmuir Road .In the evening/night Rover Way is not so bad.(Only a short road anyway)
> 
> The A48 is fine as well all the way from Chepstow to Cardiff except it can be busy during rush hour around Newport and Cardiff when I would definitely use the Peterstone Wentlooge route you have plotted.


 
Thank you Banjo. Good sound advice. I dont think were/I be at Chepstow till 8'ish, so I think that should just be fine. The A48 seems the simple option, but this route looks the flatest, as I hate hills! 

Thanks again.


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## Banjo (18 Jun 2012)

The route you plotted will be pretty easy to follow and as you say slightly flatter but a little longer.


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## Davywalnuts (18 Jun 2012)

Banjo said:


> The route you plotted will be pretty easy to follow and as you say slightly flatter but a little longer.


 
Flatter but longer, I can take, hilly and short, yuk. The route down ive extended by about 16miles, but, is about 2000ft less.. of which, I am more than happy with.


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## Banjo (18 Jun 2012)

Wheat Sheaf in Magor is a good watering hole if you needed one about there.Also a Budgens store next to it .


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## martint235 (18 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> Flatter but longer, I can take, hilly and short, yuk. The route down ive extended by about 16miles, but, is about 2000ft less.. of which, I am more than happy with.


Yeah don't let Davy near a hill. We won't see him till July 2013!!!


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## ianrauk (18 Jun 2012)

martint235 said:


> Yeah don't let Davy near a hill. We won't see him till July 2013!!!


 

LOL.. now why did I find that even the slightest bit funny  ..


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## Davywalnuts (20 Jun 2012)

Gits.


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## martint235 (20 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> Gits.


 Who? Moi?


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## Wobblers (21 Jun 2012)

martint235 said:


> Yeah don't let Davy near a hill. We won't see him till July 2013!!!


 
It's the drag caused by Davy's 64 cm (relaxed) thighs. You'd be much faster if you cut your legs off, Davy! 

So is anyone planning an Epic Ride to the start of the ride? I may see about joining you if you are...


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## Davywalnuts (22 Jun 2012)

McWobble said:


> It's the drag caused by Davy's 64 cm (relaxed) thighs. You'd be much faster if you cut your legs off, Davy!
> 
> So is anyone planning an Epic Ride to the start of the ride? I may see about joining you if you are...


 
Ahhh, but you see, all that low down gravity enables me to go down hill very fast......

And to the answer of your question, yes. 

This http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1331756 . Is currently mapped from my home though...


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## BigGee (22 Jun 2012)

I have got a train booked to Bristol on the friday afternoon. I am going to go down and see my daughter for a few hours, she is at university there. I was then planning to ride from there to Cardiff in the evening at some point, before joinning the ride.

What time do you think you will be near the bridge? Maybe I could meet up with you there and do the last bit with you, I would certainly be glad of the company.


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## Davywalnuts (22 Jun 2012)

BigGee said:


> I have got a train booked to Bristol on the friday afternoon. I am going to go down and see my daughter for a few hours, she is at university there. I was then planning to ride from there to Cardiff in the evening at some point, before joinning the ride.
> 
> What time do you think you will be near the bridge? Maybe I could meet up with you there and do the last bit with you, I would certainly be glad of the company.


 
More the merrier and I would be glad too. 

Working time scales back, as I would prefer and teef would too, to be in Cardiff by say half 9/10, then we should be near the bridge for half 6/7...

Teef?


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## BigGee (23 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> More the merrier and I would be glad too.
> 
> Working time scales back, as I would prefer and teef would too, to be in Cardiff by say half 9/10, then we should be near the bridge for half 6/7...
> 
> Teef?


 
Davy, that might be a little early for me as I won't be leaving the centre of Bristol before 7, so would be out at the bridge around 8ish. You guys will have had a long journey and I certainly would not want you to hang around for me, the onus would need to be for me to meet up with you.

Maybe we just need to play it by ear and see what time you actually get near there. I guess predicting that is not going to be an exact science over that length of journey. If I don't catch up with you, then I'll just have to follow you in.


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## User482 (25 Jun 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> Thank you Banjo. Good sound advice. I dont think were/I be at Chepstow till 8'ish, so I think that should just be fine. The A48 seems the simple option, but this route looks the flatest, as I hate hills!
> 
> Thanks again.


 
Des, RichP and I took the A48 to the start last year - it was much better riding than I'd expected, the only busy bits being through Newport and into Cardiff. I don't recall it being hilly.

Sadly, I can't make this one...enjoy!


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## User482 (25 Jun 2012)

BigGee said:


> Davy, that might be a little early for me as I won't be leaving the centre of Bristol before 7, so would be out at the bridge around 8ish. You guys will have had a long journey and I certainly would not want you to hang around for me, the onus would need to be for me to meet up with you.
> 
> Maybe we just need to play it by ear and see what time you actually get near there. I guess predicting that is not going to be an exact science over that length of journey. If I don't catch up with you, then I'll just have to follow you in.


 
The nicest/ easiest way from Bristol to the bridge is to follow the Avon cycleway (you can join it at Shirehampton), and then turn off either at Pilning station or Tockington. Takes an hour or so from the city centre.


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## lukesdad (25 Jun 2012)

Rode round bracelet bay this morning,huge beer delivery. They must know you re on your way


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## Paulus (25 Jun 2012)

Who was the Friday nighter on radio 2 this morning on Pop Master with ken Bruce? When asked who were they were doing this epic ride for, the answer quite bluntly was no-one.


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## CharlieB (27 Jun 2012)

Me too, please? Train tickets obtained at very late notice and vast cost.


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## theclaud (3 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> I'll be so fit by then I'll just saunter round the whole thing twice


 
I thought it might be time to remind you of this...


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## Mice (3 Jul 2012)

Is there a route hint? Are we going to Barry? (Ive seen too much Gavin & Stacey, clearly!).

Mice


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## srw (3 Jul 2012)

Mice said:


> Is there a route hint?


It starts in Cardiff and ends at the coast somewhere near Swansea.

And I'm disappointed that real life has got in the way of pitching up for a ride which doesn't spend its first half escaping from the Great Pimple on the arse of the island.


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## GrumpyGregry (3 Jul 2012)

For a while y'day it looked like real (working) life was going to screw up my arrangements. But today, way-hay, we are back on track.


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## Aperitif (3 Jul 2012)

1917472 said:


> Good, seeing as how a primary function of The Fridays is keeping real life in check, it behoves us as members to be watchful on this point.


And there's no better Behover's witness than you, Adrian. Is your 'swift half express' at about 11:30 or something like that?


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## Mice (3 Jul 2012)

srw said:


> It starts in Cardiff and ends at the coast somewhere near Swansea.
> 
> And I'm disappointed that real life has got in the way of pitching up for a ride which doesn't spend its first half escaping from the Great Pimple on the arse of the island.


 
Very drole srw!! Amazingly I managed to work out the start point and the end point all by myself - it's the bit in the middle I was curious about! (I dont normally care about the bit in the middle but I saw Barry Island and was curious. Your second comment is too cryptic for me - does that mean you two are not doing this ride?  If so, thats not good at all. In fact there are tearsies now.  Boo Hiss!

Mice


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## theclaud (3 Jul 2012)

Mice said:


> Is there a route hint?* Are we going to Barry?* (Ive seen too much Gavin & Stacey, clearly!).
> 
> Mice


 
No. Penarth is nice but Barry is gratuitously hilly - like a sort of pound-shop San Francisco. And that way out looks better on paper than it does in reality, due to the character of the roads. The route takes us out of Cardiff in a direct, business-like sort of way, then suddenly strikes off through the lanes for the coast, and moonlight on the water if it isn't too cloudy. El Zeqq is still mulling over a few of the possible variations for the second half, but we are being diverted by a big hole in our previous route, and we hope to avoid the plug-ugly and slightly hostile Fabian Way by taking a little scenic loop into Swansea. It finishes with five rather splendid flat miles round the bay, and the tide will be high.


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## martint235 (3 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> No. Penarth is nice but Barry is gratuitously hilly - like a sort of pound-shop San Francisco. And that way out looks better on paper than it does in reality, due to the character of the roads. The route takes us out of Cardiff in a direct, business-like sort of way, then suddenly strikes off through the lanes for the coast, and moonlight on the water if it isn't too cloudy. El Zeqq is still mulling over a few of the possible variations for the second half, but we are being diverted by a big hole in our previous route, and we hope to avoid the plug-ugly and slightly hostile Fabian Way by taking a little scenic loop into Swansea. It finishes with five rather splendid flat miles round the bay, and the tide will be high.


Now I'm really miffed with the Olympics getting in the way of me making this!


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## Mice (3 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> No. Penarth is nice but Barry is gratuitously hilly - like a sort of pound-shop San Francisco. And that way out looks better on paper than it does in reality, due to the character of the roads. The route takes us out of Cardiff in a direct, business-like sort of way, then suddenly strikes off through the lanes for the coast, and moonlight on the water if it isn't too cloudy. El Zeqq is still mulling over a few of the possible variations for the second half, but we are being diverted by a big hole in our previous route, and we hope to avoid the plug-ugly and slightly hostile Fabian Way by taking a little scenic loop into Swansea. It finishes with five rather splendid flat miles round the bay, and the tide will be high.


 
Wowzer! That sounds fantastic. Am sooooooo looking forward to it (actually was looking forward to it with or without a trip to Barry). Cant wait!

Mice


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## Mice (3 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Tidy!


 


Mice


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## theclaud (4 Jul 2012)

I don't want to get complacent, but the Met Office is now suggesting that the wind will swing round from SSW to the S and then the SSE during the very small hours of Saturday. If God has his timing right, this could be very good news...


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## dellzeqq (4 Jul 2012)

it does look that way. I'm going to give another few hours and send out an e-mail entitled 'weather forecast - Claudine 4 Met Office 0'


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## Davywalnuts (4 Jul 2012)

1918836 said:


> Who is riding to Cardiff, can we PM contact details, and what time at the bridge?


 
I've had to pull out, forgot to update the thread. I've torn ligaments in my heel and its stopping a lot of mobility and I cant bend over and I cant stretch my calf and the weather for the journey across looks dire!


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## GrumpyGregry (4 Jul 2012)

1918836 said:


> Who is riding to Cardiff, can we PM contact details, and what time at the bridge?


How long does it take a sturdy chap to get from Cardiff to the Bridge?

(not that I'd be thinking of riding out from Cardiff to meet anyone or anything)


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## Wobblers (4 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> I don't want to get complacent, but the Met Office is now suggesting that the wind will swing round from SSW to the S and then the SSE during the very small hours of Saturday. If God has his timing right, this could be very good news...


 
Would this be the same Met Office that told me Monday would be dry (it wasn't), yesterday sunny (it pissed down) and today nice (it's pissing down)?

I shall be bringing a sou'wester....


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## Wobblers (4 Jul 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> I've had to pull out, forgot to update the thread. I've torn ligaments in my heel and its stopping a lot of mobility and I cant bend over and I cant stretch my calf and the weather for the journey across looks dire!


 
FFS Davy, you need to lay off the gym! And drink more, at least when you're hung over you don't try silly things like exercise.

You should catch the train to Bristol as I'm sure Adrian won't mind giving you a tow to Cardiff. Just remember the tow rope.


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## Davywalnuts (4 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> FFS Davy, you need to lay off the gym! And drink more, at least when you're hung over you don't try silly things like exercise.
> 
> You should catch the train to Bristol as I'm sure Adrian won't mind giving you a tow to Cardiff. Just remember the tow rope.


 
Just checked the prices... pass! Shame, but great thought...


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## Davywalnuts (4 Jul 2012)

GregCollins said:


> How long does it take a sturdy chap to get from Cardiff to the Bridge?
> 
> (not that I'd be thinking of riding out from Cardiff to meet anyone or anything)


And heres a nice flat route I knocked up http://ridewithgps.com/routes/1316917


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## Wobblers (4 Jul 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> Just checked the prices... pass! Shame, but great thought...


 
What, you're not doing this!! Tell us it ain't so!

It could be cheaper to get a train to Birmingham, and change for the Cardiff train at New Street?


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## Davywalnuts (4 Jul 2012)

My foot sais no... alas.. 

Have checked, but all the fairs will eat into the Dieppe beer fund.. Tall Mart would not be impressed.. shame, but my body is useless.. And you are right, I do over-do it at the gym, but to have legs as great as mine, sometimes its worth these hiccups..


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## GrumpyGregry (4 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> I'll be on a train from Lewes to Southampton leaving Lewes soon after 5 pm, then the 8.10 from Southampton. Anyone else likely to be on the same journey? Greg?


Not me guv. I'm going down quite a bit earlier. I had plans for the afternoon and early evening in Cardiff but they've fallen through as the person I was meeting has got a paid gig in Brecon. C'est la vie.


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## Gordon P (4 Jul 2012)

Can someone be a bit more specific about the meeting point (the Millenium Basin looks wet) & also where you'll be drinking beforehand - in my case for some time beforehand....


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## theclaud (4 Jul 2012)

http://www.cyclechat.net/threads/fnrttc-cardiff-to-swansea-6th-july-2012.104036/page-5#post-1919362Gordon P said:


> Can someone be a bit more specific about the meeting point (the Millenium Basin looks wet) & also where you'll be drinking beforehand - in my case for some time beforehand....


 
We meet in front of the Wales Millennium Centre (not to be confused with the Wales Millennium Stadium) which is on Cardiff Bay, and looks like this:







The square is actually called Roald Dahl Plass, but not many people use that name.






Here's the location. It's less than five minutes from Cardiff Central Station. Not sure where people are having a beer, but there is some talk of dinner at PizzaExpress on the square.


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## Gordon P (4 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> We meet in front of the Wales Millennium Centre (not to be confused with the Wales Millennium Stadium) which is on Cardiff Bay, and looks like this:
> 
> 
> 
> ...


 

Don't think I can miss that! Thank you


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## StuAff (4 Jul 2012)

You definitely won't miss that Gordon!
My train gets in at 8.43, will be carb-loading at Pizza Express.


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## Aperitif (5 Jul 2012)

StuAff said:


> You definitely won't miss that Gordon!
> My train gets in at 8.43, will be carb-loading at Pizza Express.


Who was on at the Forum last night, Stu - the whole area was heaving when I left work - big white stars on faces, a mass tattoo-in it seemed, goth eyes galore and a whole heap of black hair dye?


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## StuAff (5 Jul 2012)

Aperitif said:


> Who was on at the Forum last night, Stu - the whole area was heaving when I left work - big white stars on faces, a mass tattoo-in it seemed, goth eyes galore and a whole heap of black hair dye?


Kiss- they were doing a benefit show for Help the Heroes.


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## Aperitif (5 Jul 2012)

StuAff said:


> Kiss- they were doing a benefit show for Help the Heroes.


Thanks - I saw a lot of Kiss tees - but wasn't sure. I was too tired to look last night. It was an undoubted success. Good for them.
KerrrrraaaaannnGGGGGGGGGG!

*although in Kentish Town and upwards, it did look a bit like Help for Strongbow!


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## BigGee (5 Jul 2012)

So is anyone cycling in from the Bristol direction now?

I am planning to leave Bristol centre around 19.30, be at the bridge around 20.30 and hopefully be in cardiff around 22.30. Will probably head for the station first for a quick re-fuel and then down to the basin, as it does not seem to be that far.

Am I likely to meet anyone on route?


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## dellzeqq (5 Jul 2012)

we'll be getting to the station at 22.30, and exiting on the south side


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## Aperitif (5 Jul 2012)

The weather looks pants. No, it's worse than that...it looks underpants!


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## dellzeqq (5 Jul 2012)

it looks pretty good. Some rain at Porthcawl, but not much.


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## DogTired (5 Jul 2012)

If I recall, statistically, it rains in Swansea every day... I'll be bringing me coat...


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## theclaud (5 Jul 2012)

DogTired said:


> If I recall, statistically, it rains in Swansea every day... I'll be bringing me coat...


 
It falls in drops, and sometimes in sheets, but never in statistics. A waterproof is sensible, but we aim to dodge the rain.


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## martint235 (5 Jul 2012)

Is like Lancashire where if you can see Pendle Hill it's going to rain and if you can't see Pendle it's raining already??


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## DogTired (5 Jul 2012)

I'm afraid it is. People think Swansea is by the sea but its actually 20 miles away. That's a big puddle to the left of the Mumbles!


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## BigGee (6 Jul 2012)

leaving for Paddington in an hour or so. Weather not looking to inspiring, its going to have to be a full waterproof jacket. I'll be lucky if I can get as far as Paddington without getting soaked!

As for tonight, the edge of the rain seems to be around the south wales coastline, so it could go either way, bit like most of the rides this year. Keeping fingers crossed.


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## theclaud (6 Jul 2012)

BigGee said:


> leaving for Paddington in an hour or so. Weather not looking to inspiring, its going to have to be a full waterproof jacket. I'll be lucky if I can get as far as Paddington without getting soaked!
> 
> As for tonight, the edge of the rain seems to be around the south wales coastline, so it could go either way, bit like most of the rides this year.* Keeping fingers crossed*.


 
Cross everything you have. It's dry here at the moment...


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## theclaud (6 Jul 2012)

1921951 said:


> Everything? It is a bit uncomfortable.


 
Never mind. It'll be worth it...


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> Never mind. It'll be worth it...


 
I can hardly bring myself to ask if it's raining in Swansea yet...


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## martint235 (6 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> I can hardly bring myself to ask if it's raining in Swansea yet...


 But you had to ask anyway didn't you? For that you deserve your own little, personalised rain cloud for the duration of the ride!


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

martint235 said:


> But you had to ask anyway didn't you? For that you deserve your own little, personalised rain cloud for the duration of the ride!


 
Well, that will make a change. Normally my own personalised rain cloud on these rides is yourself.


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## kimble (6 Jul 2012)

It's going to be Mancunian, isn't it?

I'm going to repeat the strategy that worked so well on the Dun Run. No, not falling asleep and waking up in a pile of nettles, but bringing an utterly gratuitous waterproof pannier of spare dry clothing and absolutely no sunblock or hayfever drugs.


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## DogTired (6 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> I can hardly bring myself to ask if it's raining in Swansea yet...


 
Check out www.raintoday.co.uk

A bit one sided - its like the massed forces of Mordor about to beat up some koalas.


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## kimble (6 Jul 2012)

Sometimes koalas turn out to be dropbears...


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## martint235 (6 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> Well, that will make a change. Normally my own personalised rain cloud on these rides is yourself.


And normal service will be resumed for Newhaven or Brighton!!!


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## dellzeqq (6 Jul 2012)

it was looking pretty grim this morning, but the forecast has lightened up a bit in the last couple of hours.


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## Davywalnuts (6 Jul 2012)

Spoke to Teef half hour back, he was just leaving Swindon. Been Sunny and warm with a tailwind all the way..


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## kimble (6 Jul 2012)

So, how much of the route is likely to need a snorkel...?


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

kimble said:


> So, how much of the route is likely to need a snorkel...?


 
The Met and BBC forecast is looking quite... good really. I don't want to jinx anything by saying more - or rather, get the blame...

Is there going to be the usual meeting of suspects at Cardiff Central Station?


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## theclaud (6 Jul 2012)

I might have made a slight error in deciding to come home between work and the train, seeing as I work about 500 yards from the station, and I live five miles away from it and do not own a canoe.


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## kimble (6 Jul 2012)

I was thinking flooding rather than precipitation...

My train gets in at 22:31


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## theclaud (6 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> The Met and BBC forecast is looking quite... good really. I don't want to jinx anything by saying more - *or rather, get the blame...*
> 
> Is there going to be the usual meeting of suspects at Cardiff Central Station?


 
Too late, Wobblers - it was that comment of yours upthread that did it. I'm hoping that God is only mildly narked with you and is not gearing up for the full smiting with collateral damage.


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

1922727 said:


> You've made an error? I've signed up to join Teef in his grimfest from the bridge and I've got a perfectly good train ticket from the station only a couple of miles away


 
As you said to Davy: Jacket, sorted.


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> Too late, Wobblers - it was that comment of yours upthread that did it. I'm hoping that God is only mildly narked with you and is not gearing up for the full smiting with collateral damage.


 
"Wobblers", eh? Harrumph. May you be stuck on a tandem with Patrick on a damp Sunday afternoon.

I'll have you know that not merely is it not raining in Brum, but the sun is shining...


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## Wobblers (6 Jul 2012)

kimble said:


> I was thinking flooding rather than precipitation...
> 
> My train gets in at 22:31


 
Like Scotland, Wales is used to a bit of rain. I'm sure you'll be fine with a pair of waders. Though I am taking the bike with mudguards.

Sounds like you'll be on the same train as I.


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## CharlieB (6 Jul 2012)

It was pi55ing it when I did a wee circuit round the Chilterns this morning, but a fine sunny ride down from Chesham to Slough for the train this evening. Getting in at 21:19, and heading for grub somewhere. 
May the weather gods smile on us.


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## BigGee (6 Jul 2012)

just about to leave Bristol, bouyed by an Andy Murray win (that's sunday taken care of).

Its still raining here!


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## clarion (6 Jul 2012)

Hope it dries out for you, bold adventurers.


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## kimble (7 Jul 2012)

It did, mostly. Wet but in no way Mancunian. Majority of the water was on the road (and the backs of those who brought a suboptimal amount of mudguards).


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## srw (7 Jul 2012)

Hooray for mudguards*! I hope that other planned activities also proceeded well, and that quantities of fine Brains and Penderyn are being consumed.

(*Though I had a nasty discovery yesterday when I realised that the mudguards on my Dahon knock-off Trek folder are completely and utterly ineffectual.)


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## clarion (7 Jul 2012)

Glad you had a good ride.


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## martint235 (7 Jul 2012)

It must have been wet for mudguards to have been allowed!!!


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## kimble (7 Jul 2012)

Bog Road certainly lived up to its name...


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## SaLQ83 (7 Jul 2012)

Brilliant ride. Loved the Welsh countryside and nice to have met new peeps. TC thanks you for showing us your city. And it was great catching up with some of the LonJoggers.


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## SaLQ83 (7 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Just got home after 7 hours of travelling/waiting around for trains, with a monster headache that feels as though someone's opened the top of my head and stirred the contents around with a spoon. Bad end to a very enjoyable night ride - apart from Bog Road that is (see above)! I love coming to Wales for this one, thanks TC et al. for organising - just need to sort the travelling out before next time!
> 
> The directions to the station worked a treat TC - and thank you to Sahar and George for accommpanying me. Sorry I wasn't much company on the train!


 
No worries. You were fine. To be honest we were feeling the same after the "lovely" head wind to the station. But hope you feel better see you at the next ride.


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## Mice (7 Jul 2012)

There is something about leaving London by train to start an FNRttC in another City. Somehow it is even more of an adventure and this time we were heading to TCs manor. Excellent! Tickets booked months ago, last minute questions about what to wear, what's the weather going to do, what does the DZ cat predict? Weatherspark is a new acquisition to my bookmarks and it said not too cold or, err wet.

Sahar and George concurred the same so with minimal wardrobe I headed to Paddington where I found a bear, Eddie (!) (sic), DZ and Susie. Bikes on board, we took our seats and headed West.
Two hours later we arrived in Cardiff and it was raining. Raining. We made our way to Pizza Express to join several others - TECCharlie, Stuaff, GregColllins to name a few. Over the next hour, the group grew and grew, Georgios and Sahar arrived on fine form and we made our way to the Millennium Centre for the rest of the hellos, Bungalicious and Bungano-no's from DZ. We were all getting wet. It was cold.

On the stroke of midnight, the power of TC came to the fore and the rain stopped. Just like that. We headed out of Cardiff, slightly inebriated pedestrians imitating the call of eeeezeeeeeee, asking us where were going, cheering us on "pedal 'arder, they're catching you up" kind of thing. We made our way to Tescos for a splash and dash, then out into the countryside.

The sky was cloudy, the roads were wet and it was cold. We didn't go to Barry (why would we? had already been inferred) and we weaved our way up and down gentle country lanes. At one stage the road was not much wider than an electric car, with high hedgerows, smooth tarmac and shimmering bicycle lights. It reminded me of Lonesome Lane. Some of us had mud(!£!"£!_) and some didnt.....!

The chit chat was to the FNRttC standard. Friendly, fun and actually really funny. The team of TECs and Wayfarers flew by - goodness knows how many extra miles they ride. GregColllins confirmed that he had not cleaned his bike since LonJog ("Why would I do that? It would just be getting dirtier again" I thought of Ianrauk and knew that my bike cleaning of yesterday was the right thing for my bike!

We headed along the coast, the route was just lovely. True FNRttC style. We went over a Cattle Grrrrrrrrrriiiiiiid. Immediately afterwards was a display of startled sheep. Everywhere. No Highway Code - they just ran across us, behind us, around us, scattering and baaring all the way (baaring mechanicals?) The road dropping down to the sea. It was one of my most favourites lanes ever ridden on an FNRttC.

Not long afterwards we reached Stopsies. Super Stopsies. 3am, two marvellous people making pots of tea like there was no tomorrow. Sandwiches and Welsh Cakes too. Fabulous attitude, nothing was too much trouble and they are right up there in the Stock and DeckerTim standards of Stopsies. How DZ find these peeps I have no idea.

A puncture was repaired, we were back out on the road. It was cold. I was too cold so threw myself up the next hill at the front to try and warm up. Spinning a la ttcycle style all the way. There was another puncture, the sun started throwing its light across the horizon and we could see Port Talbot. There was a discussion at the top of a hill about further hills. A lesson learned that not everyone who says there are no more hills is telling the truth.

I was a bit shattered having been up since 5.30am on Friday morning and would have happily stayed at sea level. But no, we were off again around Neath. Up, up up. Spin, check the gears being used, granny ring when needed and just keep the pedals moving. Thank you ttcycle, you have no idea how this has transformed my FNRttCs. As we regrouped - I saw something I wasnt expecting. A view. An absolutely fantastic view. I was hooked. On we went, up, down, along roads of puddles, some 45mm deep. And more views across to Port Talbot, inland and down to Swansea. Breathtaking.

The route from Swansea to Mumbles was tough - the wind was strong. But worth it. We piled into the cafe, fabulous breakfasts all round. A presentation by Sahar to DZ on behalf of the Fridays - DZs broken derailleur mounted as a trophy as a reminder and thank you from the Fridays for LonJog 2012.

Up another hill (shocked the scrambled eggs I had eaten) to beersies. Our numbers decreased one by one until Gordon, Graham, McWobble and I headed to the 2.30pm train home. Excellent company - big thanks to you all.

As for the FNRttC -Thank you DZ and Susie. Thank you TC - we know about hills now...! I took some pics. I now know why you dont notice hills. You are surrounded by them although that's not necessarily a good enough reason to deny they exist....!!! But I really like your manor. What a place in which to live. User1314 - we need to invite ourselves over for a day ride if we can (and Leoqueen 1982 + G!)

I took some pics.
https://picasaweb.google.com/108733...&authkey=Gv1sRgCI2r5qP5jJSGPg&feat=directlink

M

PS I hope this isnt boring to read. Maybe I should have slept first. At least the pics capture a bit of how it was. To put it succinctly - it was ruddy fantastic and I count my lucky Red FNRttC Stars to be part of these rides. Thank you, peeps. Truly.


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## srw (7 Jul 2012)

Mice said:


> PS I hope this isnt boring to read.


Absolutely not. Great write-up, lovely photos, and I'm really disappointed we, or I, couldn't make it. When's next year's?

(And in the traditional way, a Brit has just failed to close out a match at Wimbledon - this time it's the completely unknown Marray. Thank heavens for Wiggins).


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## Michael Adu (7 Jul 2012)

"Maybe I should have slept first. At least the pics capture a bit of how it was"
Great write up and pics I think you could throw that camera of a cliff and it would still work !


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## StuAff (7 Jul 2012)

As so often before, smashing pics M!

Even before yesterday morning, I was thinking the Trek was going to be the best bike for this one- still clean(ish) from a full monty service last week, the only bike I've got with mudguards, and disc brakes do not care if your wheel rims are covered in crud. And the Viner's Ian clean at the moment after its service- rather keep it that way for a bit! I'd got to Cardiff at a quarter to nine (the best compromise between timing and price)- train amazingly on time, though First Great Western still haven't accepted that their services along the south coast need more than three carriages- much of the time it was as crowded as a rush-hour train. And why, if I have a reserved seat, are no reservation cards displayed?..pointless.

Made my way over to Pizza Express in the rain, the journey interrupted by red lights at pretty much every junction, to be joined not long after by Greg and Gordon, then Claud, Charlie, and more of the London contingent as time went on. One thorough feed later, we made our way down to the Millenium Centre where Kim and the majority of our Welsh friends were waiting. Of the intrepid Teef, Graham and Adrian there was no sign yet.

Claud got the weather sorted for the night- it dried out just after the start, and what precipitation there was wasn't heavy and mostly confined to a short burst just before the stop. Cardiff street commentators were (mostly) amusing. One rather annoying taxi driver though- not really fast enough to help when I was trying to draft him on my way back to the front after marking (he got in the way, really..), and rather dodgy passing of the peloton earned him a short lecture from Simon.

On we went, through roads remarkably quiet even by late-night standards. Calls of 'sheep' were I think a first, the cattle grids weren't too bad on 28mm tyres at least. The three amigos eventually caught up with us just before the stop. Which was superb indeed- generous pot of tea, excellent sandwiches, and top-notch Welsh cakes, all served up with speed, efficiency and a smile. Teef unsurprisingly looked somewhat the worse for wear after a long, long day on the bike, in the pouring rain and into a headwind, but the break seemed to restore him to his usual strong self. Chapeau! for a phenomenal effort.

On we went, weather holding up, and by 5 am we even had some sunshine (pass the smelling salts). Bog Road....eek. Sorry, I'd rather have had the Fabian Way. At least I was on the right bike for a spot of cyclocross (one part of LonJog I did not enjoy was cleaning all the crud out of my very-expensive-and-recently-replaced-front brake after an alleged cycle path!). The hills weren't too arduous really, think I used the granny twice, though if I could have whatever drugs that speedy chap on the Focus Cayo's been having (every climb he seemed to storm up) that would be nice!

Jazz hands mark two was a little of a damp squib- I think there was a certain bemusement at our funny London ways on the part of the Welsh (perhaps understandable). On we went, and the Pier Cafe did a great job again. Service seemed a little confused at times, but the huge breakfast was well worth the wait. Following the presentation of the Trophy, some of us made our way up that climb to the bar- nearly made it but got the line wrong and had to walk up half of it. Next time....Then Charlie, Kim and I made our way to the station for the 11.28 to Paddington. My journey was an unexpectedly fraught one- I was supposed to change trains at Cardiff, but the Portsmouth service was cancelled. So back on until Newport, when (I thought) I'd have a long wait for the next connection. It got in at 11.42, the Pompey service was due to leave at 11.44. Fortunately, due to problems on the line the service was running late and I made it to the platform in time. Journey back to Pompey then thankfully trouble-free and less crowded than the outward leg.

Back home just before four, and the short nap became two hours of solid snoozing (think I needed it).
Thanks one and all!!


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## Mice (8 Jul 2012)

1924063 said:


> Excellent photo there Miranda.





srw said:


> Absolutely not. Great write-up, lovely photos, and I'm really disappointed we, or I, couldn't make it. When's next year's?.





Michael Adu said:


> "Maybe I should have slept first. At least the pics capture a bit of how it was"
> Great write up and pics I think you could throw that camera of a cliff and it would still work !





StuAff said:


> As so often before, smashing pics M!


 
Thank you for your kind comments, I'm glad you like the write-up and pics. What with your kind words and 10 hours sleep I now really feel a whole lot better. The ride was just fab. srw and rvw and Michael - sorry you werent there, hope you can make the next one. My camera seems to be hanging on by a thread no matter what I do to it! (I have started a back up fund for when it finally reaches its limit of how many times it can be thrown on the road, pavement, floor...!) Michael I have found another pair of legs - GordonPs. Blimey. You both pedal as though you just happen to be moving your legs,completely effort-free. The next time Im on a ride with both of you Im going to measure them. Standing next to GordonP, my hips were parallel with his knees! Must check Martin235s! Teef legs are just powerhouses. London-Cardiff-Swansea. Wowser!

I wonder if its sunny in Swansea today...........?

Mice


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## BigGee (8 Jul 2012)

Swansea was a ride I was very much looking forward to being a place I had some happy memories of, including both a rugby tour and a cycle tour. my first cycle tour in fact, when I did the same ride of friday night in reverse. Due mainly to the fact that I did not know what I was doing, the tour left me with completly knackered kness and resulted in a couple of months off the bike, but also a strange desire to do it again, which is probably why I am writing this blog now! Anyway this all happenend over twenty years ago and I have been a stanger to swansea since then, so it was good to go back.

Put off by some rather expensive train tickets to cardiff in the evening I took the opportunity to go to Bristol in the afternoon and visit my daughter first. The rain was already coming down on my ride up to paddington and stayed with me on the train ride west. I then went to my daughters new student flat and managed to catch the last set of the andy murray match with her.

So buoyed by the result and fortified by some posh clifton chips I set out at about 19,30 planning to ride up to the bridge, over and down to cardiff in time for the start. I had it in my mind to be about 38 miles, but with the benefit of hindsight I am not sure exactly where the information came from. I was making reasonable progress trying to navigate the country lanes that lead onto the bridge cycle path when I saw the flash of a red cycle jacket in front of me, I caught up and found it to be martin, looking a little road worn following his ride down from london, a long day in the rain, which was still falling. He was also trying to find his way onto the bridge and to meet up with adrain who was waiting at the service station for him.

The signage for the bridge it has to be said is not great We followed a sign for it,which then promptly took us miles out of our way and probably cost us half an hour. We did eventually make it but by that time where in need of a coffee to revive us a bit and to let us dry off a little. We then set off with a bit over two hours to make the start line, but again it was a bit further and more challenging than we thought. Newport seems to go on for ever and then we managed to lose the A48 as we came into cardiff. By this time it was clear that we were not going to make the start and we had been instructed by our leader to meet the ride at the tesco stop on the A48. However as we were now off the A48 and circling the centre of cardiff trying to find it again this was not proving easy.

When we did eventually get back on the A48 and found tesco's it turned out to be the wrong one! We were of the opinion that this was a perfectly good tesco's and we could not see why the ride had not stopped at this one, but that did not help us. Some enquiries by adrain revealed that the tesco's we wanted was another 4 miles up the road and so we girded ourselves for one last push and the lure of some food. Just as we approached it we saw the tell tale sign of the red lights of a group of cyclists dissapearing away into the distance, so we had missed then again!

We needed some food at this stage and so stopped anyway. I had done 52 miles since bristol by by this stage and god knows how many martin had done, but revitalised we got back on the chase again. Eventually we got off the main road and onto some great country lanes and some quite exhilerating riding in the dark, swooping up down and round. A few more phone calls to guide us in and we eventually re grouped at llanwit major, some greeting expletives were exchanged between the two groups and then we all carried on together.

The rest of the ride was great, an excellent stop for food, views of port talbot steelworks, some reasonably challenging hills and the 'bog road', boy I am glad that no one punctured there! Swansea bay is majestic and I even spotted the devon view guest house, venue of our rugby tour many moons ago! No sign of devon on saturday morning but the rain had stopped during the night and the wind had blown us dry.

Once I got to mumbles I took the chance to pop off to catch up with some old friends of mine who live nearby and I had not seen for a long time. A couple of hours later I caught up with the remnants of the party, for whom the drinking was still on going. I spent a very pleasant couple of hours in their company before the long slog back around the bay in the company of Andrew, Gordon and Miranda towards the station and homeward bound.

We comandeered a table on the train despite it being booked up in the hope that it would not be claimed. At bristol some people did come to claim it, despite their being lots of other empty sets in the carriage. The guard, probably the most sensible and easy going railways employee I have ever met calmly directed them to some other empty sets nearby and peace broke out. We had a nice chat with them at the end, they were going to the wimbeldon final today and so we asked them to give andy a cheer for us.

Gordon and I bade Miranda farewell at paddington and we set off eastwards throught the westend and around the city. Gordon peeled off at mile end and I soloed the last bit home to woodford green. Got home at seven, 154 miles on the clock and a long satisfying ride in the tank.

Thanks to martin and adrain for the company earlier on in the adventure, to my companions on my journey home, to simon and claudine for arranging a great ride and to eveybody else for making it a great night out. See you all again for the harwich ride in august.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

One of the hardest rides I've ever done, from pub to station that is.

an afternoon awheel in Cardiff, a Norwegian Church and a food fayre, denied a trip on a boat with bike for safety reasons, an abortive visit to a castle, the rain arrives and thoughts of the bridge and back abandoned, a most splendid arts centre, a cardboard box that wasn't, some dogs on the TV, photos of graffiti that weren't, yummy mummies smiling, precipitation to tempt Noah out of retirement, a burger, beer, the splendid Gordon P for company listening to me waffle on, another beer, a double espresso, pointless red phases where no one thing moves, overshoe doubles as saddle protector, somewhere in Cardiff a Waitrose bag blows by an puzzled tramp, pizza, friends and a diy affogatto, more friends, even more friends. Laughter. Balm to the soul.

A shift in the wind, a miracle; the rain has stopped. We exit the darkened city in a mode so different to the Great Wen. The usual enquiries "We don't do charity". A climb. An elderly man tells a tale of woe, trackstands, Susie attempting a bass-baritone "all up!", riding very, very, slowly. Police enquiries. Hedges like walls, scary shadows, pitch dark concealing who knows what behind. So much darker than the south-east. A lesson in welsh for Charlie and Susie, roads strewn with leaves and twigs, rivers and streams with tarmac bottoms, a clever idea to fight erosion perhaps, views over the Bristol Channel "Is that Weston?" Colin's wheelbearing plays the rhythm section. A silly wheel breaks a spoke, a red card is issued, such a shame but fix it roadside we cannot. The Heddlu come to look again. A grumpy man arrives with two friends. Normal service is resumed.

The wind attacks from every gate, I curse the panniers on my rack but thank my lucky stars for mood gourds. Trappist rules for the tea stop. Threats of violence. The best ham ever. Welsh cakes to die for. Coffee. Such lovely people. The kindness of strangers eh?

George earns a medal as the Welsh Waymarker, Colin goes left, a hill. A bluddy great hill. I'm am overtook. I curse the contents of my panniers. I overtake the overtookers. The view. The grumpy man has cheered up and fixes his own puncture in Pyle. A housing estate stands where once I chased an oval pill. A right turn, gratuitous hillage. Susie is not best pleased. I pour down a rain of oaths on my panniers, the Aged P, and the need to visit him.

An Epistolary diversion.

"Dear roadie peeps

The Bog Road was fantastic. Rim brakes are useless. I hope we go that way again. Every time we come to Wales. I loved it. It takes all sorts.

Yours sincerely

A descender"

The sea. A marina, a classic tailwind roll. Beware of the sand. Beware of the road train - signs erected especially for Mice. Mumbles Pier. Inferior sausages. A good line in milkshakes. 'Teef washes up. Andrew good company. I forgot to get my whisky out. A sore throat is noticed. Beer is mentioned. and mentioned again. A jersey is awarded, a Tour Operator is recognised. Some depart for the smoke, and some for the Lake District. A short but significant hill is climbed. God is thanked for triples. Bike sculpture forms; a symphony in steel and titanium and recycled coke cans.

London Pride and the best company a man could ask for. Joy arrives. As does more rain. More Pride too. Martin suggests two-timing it to the station. Nonsense is talked. Four hats is deemed excessive. A charger is sought and found. Some people go. Simon enquires. Simon nods off. French France next year. More beer? I decline. The road is hit. The cycle path declined. The wind. Oh the wind. Thank you Martin. Ticket machine disgorges. Sweet relief.

A post script....

Lunch bought. Train boarded. Angry man in bike space. I ask nicely. He answers in fluent anglo-saxon. I ask again. He rears up. I point out sign. I read out sign. He gets all racist. I tell him in the language of heaven what he can do. He no speak the language. Twat. The conductor intervenes. Ineffectually.

He tries to stare me down for the next half hour. He fiddles with my pannier. I get in his face. He gets ejected from the train. A drunk misses his stop and rails at the world. A Haven arrives, me and the drunk the only passengers. Stunningly hot. Drunk man falls over on platform. I climb aboard the bike. Nice little ride. Use of cycle path is suggested by driver. I decline. Politely and in silence. We discuss at the traffic lights. He in anglo-saxon. I agree to go back to England if he will leave my life forever.

The Aged P is tearful. Big Sis ditto. A shower. A Chinese takeway. An Englishman wins something a Wimbledon. Bed by nine. Sleep of the dead.


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## martint235 (8 Jul 2012)

Who is this grumpy man of whom you speak Mr Collins?


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

Essential Welsh for Cyclists. Lesson one

*The weather.*

_Mae hi'n bwrw glaw _= it is raining

_Mae hi'n bwrw glaw iawn_ = it is raining a lot

_Mae hi'n bwrw_ (_glaw_) yn drwm = it is really lashing it down

_Oes tafarn yn agos i fan hyn?_ = Is there a pub nearby?

_Hoffwn i gwrw, os gwelwch yn dda_ = I'd like a beer please


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

martint235 said:


> Who is this grumpy man of whom you speak Mr Collins?


My evil twin.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

1924989 said:


> Why do I always get to be the evil twin and never the good one?


It's all relative.


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## martint235 (8 Jul 2012)

1924989 said:


> Why do I always get to be the evil twin and never the good one?


I think it's just your role in life. And you are designed for it. There's very rarely a _tall_ evil baddy is there?


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## martint235 (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Darth Vader? Jaws (the guy with the dentistry, not the shark)?


I'll give you Jaws but DV is a short-a***. Goldfinger, short. The Penguin, short. And thats before we start on real life short people. They are more dangerous than koalas which you'll notice are also short


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## dellzeqq (8 Jul 2012)

well, that was very fine!

we took the train to Cardiff, and wondered at the water lying on upland fields, and whether any hay had been brought in. I wondered how many would turn up, and whether we'd find ourselves getting the same kind of thumbs down from Franklins that we got from the Pottery Barn. I was still wondering when I left the Pizza Express and rolled over to the Millennium Centre. And then I wondered no longer, because there were twenty five eager happy souls who had, for whatever reason, decided to follow Claudine and me around their home turf.

So, we set off, and, just as she had said it would, Claudine's southeasterly breeze, dry and strengthening by the minute, pushed us along the road from Bute Town, over the Taff and the Ely and on to the Cowbridge Road and up the hill to Tesco's superstore where we 'freshened up' and hoped that the Martin, Grahame and Adrian, making their way from England would catch us up.....which we now know they almost did, because, as we, with empty bladders and pockets full of choccy bars, left and went on up the A48, they came around the roundabout and made their stop, Martin being all but exhausted.

By the time the Three Mouseketeers rejoined the main road, we were off it, swooping down narrow lanes to Llantryddid, relieved that last year's broken surface had been replaced by smooth tarmac. Past a duck pond, past a ruin, all barely visible on a dark night, up to the Llanmaes crossroads, the wind now coming round, helpfully, from the east to guide us in to Llantwit Major where, our brave boys caught us, just in time to watch the front of the ride zoom off at warp speed, intent on stretching the ride over the ten miles to sandwiches, tea, coffee and welshcakes at Ogmore-by-Sea, and thus staggering our arrival at Franklin's Cafe. Which we did, cattlegrids and sheep in the road notwithstanding, arriving at a quarter to three to find some very fine ham sandwiches and strong coffee served with a smile, while the surf crashed on to the beach outside.

We left, and went northeast to Ewenny, big raindrops bashing our right sides, and then turned west, gaining the wind, daylight and about three hundred feet of height to Cefn Cribwr, then returning to the coastal strip and forging through Port Talbot to Neath.

Ten miles to go, and the best lay ahead of us. A brief sharp ascent to Sgiwen and then the ride down to Swansea on Bog Road, the kind of little adventure denied to those of us in the southeast. How skilfully we picked our way between potholes and slews of gravel, the water running across the road and through our spokes a testament to nature's economy!

Entering Swansea we did a tour of 'SA1', a kind of Sustrans paradise with added fake tan, before joining the cycle path that almost redeems the species as it glides around the marvellous Swansea Bay.

The last half mile in to the wind was instructive, but fun in an odd way, teeing up our appetites for breakfast at the excellent Mumbles Pier Cafe, and the apres-petit dejeuner beers at Castelamare, which is a sort of road/house cum viewpoint on top of the cliffs overlooking those very breasts that give the Mwmbwls their identity.

Susie and I stayed on for the day, Claudine plying us with food, drink and conversation, although the drink proved a little too much for me and I was asleep by half past seven.

Swansea was bathed in sunshine this morning. The bay was as calm as calm could be, and we tootled to the station for the ride home wearing one layer too many.

It's all good, this Welsh ride thing, but don't let the joy blind you to Claudine's hard work and resourcefulness. As one halfway stop folded another was found to take its place. As one route was deemed too tepid, (or too full of 12 metre deep excavations) another, more exhilarating road was conjured up to bring the best that Glamorgan can offer to the FNRttC. This is a great little number, and I'm already looking forward to the 2013 edition. Thanks, TeeCee........our very own National Gallery, Garbo's Salary and Cellophane all at the same time!


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## martint235 (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Martin, you are right. I'm five foot one, and you really wouldn't like me when I'm angry - ask lukesdad ...


I don't know why as you're a very likeable person but the following extract from Benidorm springs to mind:

The Oracle: You wouldn't like me when I'm angry
Mateo: I don't like you now.
The Oracle: No you _really_ wouldn't like me when I'm angry
Mateo: I really don't like you now.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

I'm nearly always angry. Maybe that's why so few people like me?


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## ianrauk (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Just don't try telling me a ride that includes the Devil's Staircase is not all that hilly! I just let lukesdad know I was a bit miffed, and he blenched - which I consider a triumph as he is well 'ard innit.


 

Blenched?


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

ianrauk said:


> Blenched?


As we might say 'Eff me. He effing went effing pale'


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> It's like a mixture of blanched and flinched (and it is in the dictionary so I didn't make it up!)


I beg to differ. As does my dictionary. About the flinching bit.


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## thom (8 Jul 2012)

1924000 said:


> Feisty bastards koalas.


How come you're koalified to judge ?


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## kimble (8 Jul 2012)

I, for one, enjoyed Bog Road. But I'm weird like that, and had brought the holy trinity of reasonably wide tyres, disc brakes and mudguards.

Oh yes - this is the only ride I've ever done where the mayor has shaken my hand afterwards. Make of that what you will (I reckon it's because he was a bit confused, and I have a really cool bike (see above)).


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## martint235 (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Just don't try telling me a ride that includes the Devil's Staircase is not all that hilly! I just let lukesdad know I was a bit miffed, and he blenched - which I consider a triumph as he is well 'ard innit.


Is the Devil's Staircase fun then? I do fancy a go at that.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

User13710 said:


> Ahem '*Blench*:* verb,* make a sudden flinching movement out of fear or pain ... origin: Old English _blencan_ 'deceive', of Germanic origin; later influenced by BLINK.'
> 
> _Oxford Dictionary of English_, second edition, revised, 1998.


Then you can't have going pale. and did I say my dictionary isn't very good?


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

martint235 said:


> Is the Devil's Staircase fun then? I do fancy a go at that.


There are several fun climbs between Abergwesyn and Tregaron. Does depends on your definition of fun though. Personally I don't think the Devil's Staircase is all that, if you've the right gears.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

GregCollins said:


> Then you can't have going pale. and did I say my dictionary isn't very good?


Actually we are all wrong. Blench means extremely large, as in even bigger than tonk. Funny thing meaning, mutable.


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## GrumpyGregry (8 Jul 2012)

thom said:


> How come you're koalified to judge ?


Why the fark is that Koala wearing a helmet? Surely they are only compulsory in Oz for humans?


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## martint235 (9 Jul 2012)

GregCollins said:


> Why the **** is that Koala wearing a helmet? Surely they are only compulsory in Oz for humans?


 Because it might save its life obviously. D'oh.


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## Aperitif (9 Jul 2012)

Aperitif said:


> The weather looks pants. No, it's worse than that...it looks underpants!





dellzeqq said:


> it looks pretty good. Some rain at Porthcawl, but not much.


Just get that one out of the way for a K.O. 

Well, that was very fine!
No, not the rain silly - that was torrential at times. I declare a liking for The Mumbles. Listeners might think it is affection for Greg and Adrian on a good day (which would be true) but - I. Just. Like. It.
And, as a sort of homage a Frank, (who will be doing a 24hr time trial later this month and tooling about with folk like me might be just a bit too off-putting to risk mental destruction riding to the Land of the Bloody Great Fishes) after he led a ride down there last year, I wanted to do this once more for fun. Davy, having pulled the thread on the right leg of his super-wide shorts was unable to participate, which was ok. I would have been happy with 'Route 1' along the A4 but preferred the original x-country style, taking in various bits, particularly with relevance to last year's ride - cheers, Frank.




For anyone who glimpsed the countryside attached to my bike by Mumbles End...this was just before setting off...
I delayed 'the off' for a couple of hours in the vain attempt to start dry and get warmed up. The rain was falling like hard pencils (it wasn't 2B) so wet it was. No problem though as it stopped 14 hours later.




Last year the ride was two months earlier and the pond at Harefield was bathed in sunshine. Even the ducks were feeling down...
Harefield was awash. Other minor roads were flooded; it was impossible to pick up on the descents as there was invariably a Buckinghamshire Booby-Trap waiting - submerged, ready to puncture and buckle...it became a bit dicey and, overall, a quite 'technical' (for me) ride. (Which is why I 'looked tired' - riding and thinking are not my strong points obviously...along with the multi-tasking element my brane was steaming )




I dialled in Swindon and went direct. A coffee and pie were hoovered up at a garage. These '+ facilities' are welcoming welcoming welcoming. I realised that the float on my pedals was coming in handy along the route...Whilst wondering when I should change into my dry gloves  I took a look at an atlas. 'Aust' was nearest to Nirvana and Adrian (I make no distinction, although Nirvana needs to get up to speed...) and Boom! I was off again to Malmesbury and beyond - not a wing walker in sight (you'll have to trawl for last year's report to find out about all that biz.) Stopped for a phantom puncture and changed gloves. Dry gloves were wet in five seconds as it was thrashing down by then, but I needed to ramp it up to get to Adrian etc.
Saw some idiot in an Altura red jacket idiotically cycling in the wet, and I thought I was looking in the mirror "BigGeesus!" I exclaimed. Luckily, Graham knew the way.
To Amarillo but not The Services at the Bridge. The signeage is farking useless and assumes one can read stuff hidden behind trees and written in 72pt in the dark... but we made it and Adrian bought rescue coffee.
A sightseeing tour of Newport and Cardiff, including a SuperTesco, followed by a disappearing peloton of red lights from the next, was our reward. It had almost stopped raining - whoopeeee-do! Almost. By this time, I needed to get off the bike - not for long but just for walksies and a sandwich. Ate one and then tried to eat the other two bits whilst trying to climb that big enough slope after departing Tesco. Difficult! Adrian has expletived himself out by this point - unwrapping his telephone at every opportunity sounded like he was leading in The Tourette de Wales...louder and louder - made me smile. If I had been on time it wouldn't have happened - sorry Adrian.
Then we all got together and normal service was resumed. The back of the ride was ramping up the pace and I wondered what was going on to let the ride split so much - but there was a logic. The latter stages of the ride were interesting for me - the ups and downs, just being nosey...




The rainbow was dropping toward The Cafe at Mumbles.
And the rain stopped. Herewith a rare example of morning shadows, cast by the sun - a delight:




I commendeered the Dyson Airblade and basin within the gents WC, to wash and do drysies on my overshoes. Then I tried to wash my legsies and found the only way was to use the overshoes to do scrubsies - and got them all dirty again! Personal hygiene is never my strong point (except for the smell) and so didn't bother further.
It rained some more while we looked out on the magnificent widescreen of the Bay. "This is a right mare" I said to myself, and just then - he appeared! Complete with official photographer, but not for us, although Kim deigned to give him an audience and they shook hands. It would be funny if the pic. appeared in the paper instead of who it was supposed to be...Claudine will spy no doubt, and report back.




Adrian's bicycle, alone, looking like it was from another planet
- before we set off as sensible, refreshed people to get battered by some wind+, on the road to the Station, then London, for our various obligations.
A lovely adventure. No idea how far but a bit longer to arrive than last year plus whatever the length of the Cardiff - Mumbles bit was. 220-230 miles? Dunno - didn't start the counter. Nice folk to talk to and Miranda offered me a cup of teasies as soon as I got to the halfway point - excellent service.
Thank you Simon and Susie - you love me both. 

PS. For sale: See below. (Note to self - don't be an arse next time and think the impossible!)


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## Flying Dodo (9 Jul 2012)

Epic ride & write-up Martin. I had thought about repeating last year's ride to Cardiff - I had even bought 2 brand new tyres as preparation. However, at the time they released train tickets back to London, my train-fu must have failed, as I couldn't find cheap ones back with a bike reservation.


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## Aperitif (9 Jul 2012)

Flying Dodo said:


> Epic ride & write-up Martin. I had thought about repeating last year's ride to Cardiff - I had even bought 2 brand new tyres as preparation. However, at the time they released train tickets back to London, my train-fu must have failed, as I couldn't find cheap ones back with a bike reservation.


Thanks, Adam - you would have been a welcome companion, as you had a score to settle. Next time.
Funnily enough, the 'lift' for me was when I passed the scene of one of your rubber-based events* - outside Malmesbury - and then got to that house where the horse was looking out over the wall at us. This year, I could see him, indoors watching telly - even the white horses on the slopes were galloping for cover. But it meant that I was in hot pursuit of that coffee at the bridge...

* One on a bike I mean - not the usual sort.


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## theclaud (9 Jul 2012)

dellzeqq said:


> our very own National Gallery, Garbo's Salary and Cellophane all at the same time!


 
That may well be the first time I've been Cole Portered in a Cyclechat thread  . If people will excuse my intertextual ramblings, it's put me in mind of an obscure Mumbles connection. I came across this account featuring a school in Newton Road (up the hill towards my old house) known as "Miss Pinkham's". I know nothing else about Miss Pinkham of Mumbles, or whether she had any connection to her famous namesake from Massachusetts, but I suspect it was the latter that Irving Berlin was referring to in his alternative lyrics for Porter's tune:

You’re the top! You’re Miss Pinkham’s tonic.
You’re the top! You’re a high colonic.
You’re the burning heat of a bridal suite in use.
You’re the breasts of Venus.
You’re King Kong’s penis
You‘re self-abuse.
You’re an arch in the Rome collection.
You’re the starch in a groom’s erection.
I'm a eunuch who has just been through an op.
But if baby I’m the bottom, you’re the top.

But I digress...

I always believed that the rain would stop and the wind would swing behind us. And anyway, I had already decided it would be McWobble’s fault if it didn’t. But this doesn’t explain why anyone _else_ would show up, for earlier in the evening it looked, to anyone not employing the same tactic of insane optimism, like a night for masochists only.

I got to Swansea station _very fast_ (which was, ahem, alarming), and somehow without getting wet, but I thought of John Cardy's hardy CTC posse setting of to ride to Cardiff from Briton Ferry at 6:30pm (just before the deluge) and almost wept for them. I got word of a couple of cancellations, and as I found myself the only cyclist on the train I took to Cardiff, I feared that they had set the tone for the evening, and that the pre-ride charm offensive on Franklin's might be all in vain. But I was cheered to find Greg, Stu, Gordon and (after a short while) Charlie at the PizzaExpress as planned, and even more cheered when a dryish and smiling John C and his merry band appeared, having wisely traded in the team heroics for a train ride, a dinner in Chip Alley and a couple of pints of Brains at the Prince of Wales. The other John, and Colin, had started earlier and made the ride up from Swansea in good spirits, as had the irrepressible Gareth. We were soon joined by Simon and Susie, with an entourage of Fridays Indispensables, and as we studied the bunting flapping around outside, we started to read good omens into its movements.

Time to gather in earnest, and we might have wandered hopelessly around the bay for hours, had Gordon not used his special powers to locate the inconspicuous assembly point:






Simon forgot to mention sheep in the safety talk, and we were still Three Mouseketeers short, but we set off, the wind at our backs and the rain abated. Much of the rest has been told, and it wouldn't be fair for me to harp on any longer about just how good it felt to be cossetted along the Vale of Glamorgan coastline by benign weather gods; to be blown through tree-tunnels, pedalling now and again just because it would be rude not to. So I won't mention any of that, and I will just say A Few Things About Hills, by way of explanation or apology, depending on your point of view.

Those who have not ridden the route before are unlikely to appreciate that we made at least four hills disappear completely from the first half of the ride. At other times, and for those less blessed than The Fridays, there is a mildly tiresome climb on the road to Llanmaes, a short, sharp slope between St Donat's and Marcross, and an irksome upward drag before Monknash. The aforementioned tailwind and the the magic of the night simply did away with all of these, producing an illusion and experience of flatness that is generally difficult to come by in Wales. The fourth hill, memorably climbed in both directions last year by Simon and John the GP in a brief rescue mission, we did away with by the more prosaic method of going round it instead of over it. Lots of sums were done involving swings, roundabouts, sixes and half-dozens, and we sacrificed the ride's best descent for the gentler charms of the St Bride's Loop - a move which led us, indirectly, to Pam and Julie at Franklin's and their home-baked ham.

Then there was a hill swap. Our halfway break used to be followed by what Simon described as an "undistinguished" climb, through Tythegston towards Porthcawl. Although better at night than in the day, it's an unsatisfying stretch of road that has been bothering me for some time, and not just because a honey bee once perished in the TC decollétage on the descent. The swap, which we now know as The Laleston Variation or The Cefn Cribwr Conversion, was effected one very damp day when Simon heroically risked investigating a yawning chasm in the road in order to save Susie and me an unnecessary mile in the rain. The hole in the road, into which every FNRttC since the beginning could disappear and still leave room for every FNRttC yet to come, spoilt the line of the route from Porthcawl and drove us to seek from the ridge a view which would compensate us for the loss of our dawn stop on the bridge. It did not escape the notice of one or two dear friends, who I would not have thought to be of the bean-counting persuasion, that the swapped hills were not precisely equal in every sense. Opinions as to which offers more bounce for the ounce can be entertained at length when the big hole in the road gets filled in. In the meantime, send them to the Highways Department at Neath Port Talbot County Borough Council...

The rest is all about hills and bogs, and the space between having already been snaffled by motor vehicles. When the Cardiff to Swansea ride was first mooted, my assessment of the possibilities was that the route would pretty much sort itself out as far as Port Talbot, but that the approach to Swansea, to put it as politely as possible, needed work. The sort of work it really needs involves dropping a bomb on some really stupid people in large municipal buildings, but the FNRttC is a peaceable affair, and occupies itself instead with scratching its head and looking at maps until something more benign suggests itself. Last year, directness and flatness did all the suggesting, but we couldn't overlook the fact that lots of people simply hated riding along the Fabian Way. There's a cycle path alongside, naturally, but it's exactly the sort of squalid ghetto that makes Sustrans sound like a swear word. So we decided to do it differently. To the north of Fabian Way there is a very large bog. A road skirts its west edge, between the bog and a something called Kilvey Hill, which (suffice to say) is beloved of Downhill mtbers. The Bog Road is the least hilly road into Swansea from the east, after the Fabian Way. It is also one of only three locations in Britain where you will find _Dolomedes plantarius_, the Great Raft Spider. Don't do a Google Image Search if you are of weak constitution. These fearsome beasts lurk at the edges of the water and skim across the surface to sink their fangs into anything that remains still for a second. This, and not the poor surface, was the true reason for the over-solicitous safety talk at the beginning of the Bog Road. The ride had to be kept moving steadily and safely, or the FNRttC might have suffered its first losses due to predation. We didn't want to worry anyone, so we kept everyone busy shouting about potholes and gravel. It's trucks or giant spiders, folks - time to make up your minds...

It was a pleasure to ride with you all around my home turf. Oddly, since you've gone, the freak South-Westerlies have returned. I really can't account for it...


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## Aperitif (9 Jul 2012)

Still awaiting the book...and what a fine way for a bee to perish. And that tree is bending over backwards to prove Adrian right! (Or maybe he's just out of picture, left, ranting at it?)


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## Aperitif (9 Jul 2012)

1926754 said:


> I reckon that insects appreciating a good death is a tad fanciful, they can't even have a concept of breasts.


Trust you to come along and put a fly in the ointment! Besides, what about waspies? (No, not waspsies - something else entirely) Plenty of those have been ruined around a person's enbyappointment, or whatever it is called.


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## User10571 (10 Jul 2012)

Aperitif said:


> Well, that was very fine!.............
> View attachment 10771


 

Good words, Martin.


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## Davywalnuts (10 Jul 2012)

Great read TC. However, now I know of such creepy crawly beasts, I dont think I will ever do the Wales ride.. its insidious!!


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## theclaud (10 Jul 2012)

They don't crawl, Davy. They lunge. And shouldn't that have some kind of warning on it?


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## Aperitif (10 Jul 2012)

> insidious


Davy got bitten by _'lexicographus thighii'_ I reckon.


> I dont think I will ever do the Wales ride


Cop out.

Morning Afternoon Davos.


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## DogTired (10 Jul 2012)

Thanks Simon and TC for a cracking ride! From a novice FNRttC (personal) perspective...
1. Twas a lot faster than I expected
2. Was a lot less hilly than expected
3. You can't feel tired when the bloke next to you has ridden from London!
4. Getting a cafe open at 3 in the morning with that level of hospitality is quite an achievement!
5. For us country dwellers the bog road was pretty bog standard - and I learned all about the niceties of land-fill technology on the way down it!
6. Heh, I thought the over-bridge hand-jive would be more Gareth Hunt/velo-warrior/anti-car than what it turned out to be, not the John Travolta/Grease version. Thankfully that's as far as John Travolta went, so the only 'happy finish' after that was the fry-up at the Mumbles.


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## theclaud (10 Jul 2012)

DogTired said:


> Thanks Simon and TC for a cracking ride! From a novice FNRttC (personal) perspective...
> 1. Twas a lot faster than I expected
> 2. Was a lot less hilly than expected
> 3. You can't feel tired when the bloke next to you has ridden from London!
> ...


 
DT - give us a clue - I'm not connecting the CC username with the ackshul cyclist.


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## DogTired (10 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> DT - give us a clue - I'm not connecting the CC username with the ackshul cyclist.


 
White specialised, facially a mix of confusion and fatigue. Usually running towards the front in the red-lights of the those two chaps from the Uni after my front-light packed up. (One of whom was Mr whippet up the hills - on the train over from Swanners he was bemoaning he hadnt been on his bike for about 3 months - big fibber!)


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## Davywalnuts (10 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> They don't crawl, Davy. They lunge. And shouldn't that have some kind of warning on it?


 
I do lunges at the gym, but from what I am gathering of said subject, this would entail great but scary memories of that 90's movie, which donned, some how, a PG certificate, Arachnophobia... I fear, once bitten and paralyzed, my thighs could be feasted on for weeks.. Death, would not come quick... 

And yes, oopps, my bad! But, you seen all those eyes!!!!???


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## theclaud (10 Jul 2012)

DogTired said:


> White specialised, facially a mix of confusion and fatigue. Usually running towards the front in the red-lights of the those two chaps from the Uni after my front-light packed up. (*One of whom was Mr whippet up the hills* - on the train over from Swanners he was bemoaning he hadnt been on his bike for about 3 months - big fibber!)


 
Ah that will be young Nick. The pic of the WMC above is his. Yes he doesn't do much lollygagging on hills...


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## theclaud (10 Jul 2012)

Davywalnuts said:


> I do lunges at the gym, but from what I am gathering of said subject, this would entail great but scary memories of that 90's movie, which donned, some how, a PG certificate, Arachnophobia... I fear, once bitten and paralyzed, my thighs could be feasted on for weeks.. Death, would not come quick...
> 
> And yes, oopps, my bad! But, *you seen all those eyes!!!!???*


 
Far too many eyes. It's uncalled for. I've got a close-up somewhere, which a so-called friend of mine emailed as an attachment with the filename "fluffybunny.jpg". I'll need a strong coffee before I look for it...


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## Davywalnuts (10 Jul 2012)

theclaud said:


> Far too many eyes. It's uncalled for. I've got a close-up somewhere, which a so-called friend of mine emailed as an attachment with the filename "fluffybunny.jpg". I'll need a strong coffee before I look for it...


 
Not so nice! The biggest i've seen was in Thailland.. they were massive, albeit not as big as Stu's rucksack..


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## martint235 (10 Jul 2012)

MTFU the lot of you. It's a spider for crying out loud! Nothing a size 11 SPD shoe can't deal with.


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## mmmmartin (10 Jul 2012)

mmmmartin said:


> Listen up dudes, there's a nooo geezer joining you on this, he's called John O and he's sort of family


did

he turn up and
enjoy it?


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## DogTired (10 Jul 2012)

martint235 said:


> MTFU the lot of you. It's a spider for crying out loud! Nothing a size 11 SPD shoe can't deal with.


 
Onlookers reported that shortly after those brave words he was seen "being worn like a feed-bag" by the 8-legged felon...


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## DogTired (10 Jul 2012)

mmmmartin said:


> did
> 
> he turn up and
> enjoy it?


 
Aaarrr - yep! He did and he did! And now Kate would like a word with you apparently. Her words were along the lines of "A quick chat with Martin and I'm to be a bl**dy Audax widow* now, am I?".

After getting a long stare for suggesting the Brighton Sept Fnaar I believe LEL remains at this point unmentioned...

I bet Wiggins doesnt have this trouble.


* Maybe an alternative name for that spider???


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## mmmmartin (10 Jul 2012)

Well Brighton is a splendid ride and with the Dreaded Ditchling Beacon, it would be churlish not to take part.


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## Mice (10 Jul 2012)

That was a lovely bloody hilly ride up write up TC. It almost made me forget what those hills were really like - PING: Agent Hilda - "Have you noticed the tactic to sell us hills on the basis there are lower than the mountainous ones originally selected for the route?" I have to say again though, it was a fab ride. What a place in which to live. The only thing that will have changed is Bog Road which must be clean as a whistle now given the two hours I have just spent removing the debris from my bicycle. It was so bad I had to remove the wheels!

Am looking forward to the next one. 

Mice


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## Agent Hilda (10 Jul 2012)

Dammit! Is Agent Hilda going to have to write a ride report every bloody time? Not sure I can keep this up. I'm exhausted natch making television dot comming and checking the 'bathrooms' at The Towers.

I always look forward to a weekend away from the smoke although I worry a little about the food and things being boarded up etc but this is Karma balancing out all the saturdays I spend in Sloane Square in Agnes B (mais oui!) and Peter Jones (a workers co-op as you all know). So to keep the planets in line here goes . . .

So we started with a dash to the station to be greeted by OUR MAYOR blasting on about Olympics etc etc. Jeeeeez! How annoying is he? Thank F I didn't vote for him! Hah!

More annoying were the company on the train up - annoying mother, annoying cherub faced flowery dress little girl and annoying kicking scooter rider snotty boy - all the way to Cardiff. DZ 's self control was admirable. 

It was great to get off the effing train and head to the Italian and a glass of sparkly water and four toilet stops in one hour and meet the really lovely Welsh Contingent who looked pretty damn fit to me and like they were going to be FAST whatever the weather.

So we cycled for about 10 hours up and down up and down up and down using all the gears through lovely lovely Wales on our lovely lovely bikes meeting Sheeps and all sorts on the way (though still no sign of a) A Tawny Owl b) A March Hare or c) A Stoat - so countryside failure all round I say).

Truthfully I only cried once after being a bad tempered mare and I never once lay on the ground and had a paddy. Greg will testify to that. And he is a St btw. DZ was very pleased with me as The Rube 2 magically made me fly up all the hills and I looked pretty natty too (thanks photographers).

Bfast was grrrrrrreat! But even after chips with chips I wasn't going to risk it and walked up the slope to the pub for delicious London Pride. Missing Adrian of course who is the best drinking buddy ever bar The Claud.

We then repaired to The Castle and had prawn cocktails, mashed potatoes and a couple of glasses. Off to the pub said Del and then onwards to a bar where we read Hello and had the most fantastic Gin and Tonics EVER!!! There is something so marvellous about cycling all night and then getting loaded on gin. Simon got a second wind but TC and I (ever the moderate ones) insisted he go home and sleep. Good job too seeing as how he is now laid up and coughing like a Victorian, plus I think we saved Wales from some truly 10 out of 10 flirting with Welsh birds in sparkling frocks.

Thank you all - what ladies and gents you are in the dead of the night putting up with me sleeping, singing and whistling and whatever and still having no clue how to fold the Brommie, change a tyre or what a de-rayler actually does.

Next up - Paris Alors!


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## Wobblers (11 Jul 2012)

What with the torrential rain during the day I was a little concerned I'd be facing TC's wrath, or at least blame. Happily, it all dried up for tea time and blue skies greeted my ride to the station. I had only a few moments to admire the way that _every_ train on the board was late when Kim rolled up. With mudguards, disc brakes and a spare set of dry clothing it was clear she was prepared for Morecambe Part II.

My earlier fears returned on the train as theclouds steadily darkened. Rain greeted us once we got to Cardiff. We decided the better part of common sense if not valour was to wait in the station until someone else showed up or the rain stopped. TMN duly showed up accompanied by firends who seemed to know where they were going. Result!

We made good time to the Millennium Centre, and hence to Pizza Express. Who weren't serving any more. Not a result! But the rain did stop! Double result! And I was vindicated!

The ride itself had its ups and downs - and wonderful little farm roads to Llanwit Major. Were I succeeded in _not_ losing the ride, but the intrepid trio of Adrian, BigGee and 'Teef finally caught up with us.

More delightful roads followed, until I was waymarking at a junction a couple of miles before the halfway stop. Whereupon a taxi pulled up and three people poured themselves from it. I steeled myself for the worst when I heard the inevitable cries of "Look, a cyclist!!", but they were just curoius as to what was going on.

"You're going _where_?"
"Still ten of you to come? How about I get you a cup of tea? Infact, I'll get you _ten_ cups of tea, how's about that?"
- "That's very kind of you but we've got our halfway tea stop just coming up"
"Oooh, I'll bring you a cuppa, you can drink it if you're still here!"

And he did! Wonderful! You'd never have guessed, at three in the morning in the middle of nowhere, but that's it: it's these acts of kindness that keep me coming to the FNRttC, that reinvigorate my faith in humanity. And if you ever read this, Jamie, you're a Top Bloke. Thank You.

The tea stop, for all that it had been arranged at the last moment, was wonderful, the staff and cakes simply delightful. Bog Road, it must be said, was somewhat less so. But Mumbles Pier more than made up for it. And though Greg said this was the "antisocial table", he was anything but. Neither was 'Teef, even after his marathon 250 miles. The milk shake was to die for - and, Greg, I owe you for that.

The customary post-ride debrief was held at the pub at the top of the hill - and well done for climbing it, Mice! Sadly, all too soon it was time to go.

A fine ride then. Just as well, really, as the plaster cast and pair of crutches are telling me that it'll be my last FNRttC for a while...


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## Aperitif (11 Jul 2012)

> A fine ride then. Just as well, really, as the plaster cast and pair of crutches are telling me that it'll be my last FNRttC for a while...


So don't leave a nice story as a bloody cliffhanger then - you tight Scotch git - what happened?*

*Theatrical exaggeration you understand, Andrew - but you had better not have caught your hair in a bush and been launched roadwards etc Get well soon and tell more.


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## martint235 (11 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> A fine ride then. Just as well, really, as the plaster cast and pair of crutches are telling me that it'll be my last FNRttC for a while...


 Yeah what have you done? Who am I going to take the p*** out of chat to now in the darkest hours of a FNRttC?


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## Davywalnuts (11 Jul 2012)

Ohhhh, so that 'orriable spider did claim a victim then....


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## Wobblers (11 Jul 2012)

Aperitif said:


> So don't leave a nice story as a bloody cliffhanger then - you tight Scotch git - what happened?*
> 
> *Theatrical exaggeration you understand, Andrew - but you had better not have caught your hair in a bush and been launched roadwards etc Get well soon and tell more.


 
Oi! It's _Scottish_, not Scotch! I'm not a sodding whisky! (The rest is undeniable... )

What happened? Well, I crashed, didn't I? And broke my sodding ankle: no sense going for the lowly cliche of a broken collar bone when you can go for the jugular, is there? One day I'm going to have to learn the art of falling off without breaking anything. Any tips?


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## Aperitif (11 Jul 2012)

> Any tips?


Sturdy legs. They can still be hollow...but sturdy.
Tough luck Andrew - luck of the Scotch eh? 
I suppose that's knocked this season's highland championships for six too?


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## Mice (12 Jul 2012)

McWobble said:


> What with the torrential rain during the day I was a little concerned I'd be facing TC's wrath, or at least blame. Happily, it all dried up for tea time and blue skies greeted my ride to the station. I had only a few moments to admire the way that _every_ train on the board was late when Kim rolled up. With mudguards, disc brakes and a spare set of dry clothing it was clear she was prepared for Morecambe Part II.
> 
> My earlier fears returned on the train as theclouds steadily darkened. Rain greeted us once we got to Cardiff. We decided the better part of common sense if not valour was to wait in the station until someone else showed up or the rain stopped. TMN duly showed up accompanied by firends who seemed to know where they were going. Result!
> 
> ...


 
This was a marvellous post - right up to the very last line. I love the reference to (albeit someone else's) Shmudguards - we all know how popular they are!! The reminder of the roads, lack of rain and the epic 250 Teef miles. And thank you for my mention - I have no idea how I rode up that hill, never mind after breakfast! What lovely people providing tea in the street. That sort of sums up the spirit of FNRttCs and they weren't even on the ride! But I am distracted by the last line - I can hardly believe it. I have found your post in General Cycling and will comment massive commiserations there. Cant believe that would happen to you. Am shocked.

Mice


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## StuartG (13 Jul 2012)

Mice said:


> I have found your post in General Cycling and will comment massive commiserations there.


M - thank you for pointing me in the right direction: http://www.cyclechat.net/threads/how-i-broke-my-ankle.105959/


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## frank9755 (10 Sep 2012)

Flying Dodo said:


> Epic ride & write-up Martin. I had thought about repeating last year's ride to Cardiff - I had even bought 2 brand new tyres as preparation. However, at the time they released train tickets back to London, my train-fu must have failed, as I couldn't find cheap ones back with a bike reservation.


 


Aperitif said:


> Thanks, Adam - you would have been a welcome companion, as you had a score to settle. Next time.
> Funnily enough, the 'lift' for me was when I passed the scene of one of your rubber-based events* - outside Malmesbury - and then got to that house where the horse was looking out over the wall at us. This year, I could see him, indoors watching telly - even the white horses on the slopes were galloping for cover. But it meant that I was in hot pursuit of that coffee at the bridge...
> 
> * One on a bike I mean - not the usual sort.


 
Didn't realise that you'd ridden out again this year, 'Teef. But I was riding back the other way in May and the memories came back when I passed the horse's field, the grassy verge where I managed to slice my leg with chainring while we were fixing a puncture. I had my sandwich at Malmesbury and thought about the flying wing girl...

Next year!


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