# It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife.



## simongt (11 Aug 2016)

Being that sort of person, whenever I see a fellow cyclist apparently in trouble, I always stop and offer assistance. What I find interesting is that when it's a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike, my offer of assistance is invariably politely declined with a statement to the effect of '..It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife / partner / girlfriend / the other 'arf and she's picking me up..' 
Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife / partner / girlfriend / other 'arf, or they don't drive or there isn't a car available. 
So WE have to deal with whatever the situation is - ! 

Observations please - !


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## steve50 (11 Aug 2016)

Erm, ok, I guess it's just easier (lazier) to repair a p#nct#re or whatever at home than it is at the side of the road?
I don't have the luxury of a wife who drives so its fix at the side of the road or walk.


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## ufkacbln (11 Aug 2016)

simongt said:


> Being that sort of person, whenever I see a fellow cyclist apparently in trouble, I always stop and offer assistance. What I find interesting is that when it's a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike, my offer of assistance is invariably politely declined with a statement to the effect of '..It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife / partner / girlfriend / the other 'arf and she's picking me up..'
> Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife / partner / girlfriend / other 'arf, or they don't drive or there isn't a car available.
> So WE have to deal with whatever the situation is - !
> 
> Observations please - !



The answer is simple - get married!

A wife / SO is an integral part of the tool kit!


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## Hacienda71 (11 Aug 2016)

I ride a road bike and generally I fix any issues myself by the road. Normally I will turn down assistance as I take tools and parts to cover most eventualities. All that said, I did borrow an innertube of a guy watching the race I was in when I punctured about 3 miles from the HQ and was going to have to walk it and he offered. In races I only carry some cleat covers. The only time I called the wife was when I crashed about a mile from home and due to the quantity of blood wasn't sure of the extent of my injuries.


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## fossyant (11 Aug 2016)

I've only ever called home once after a rim exploded. Not bad in 30 years. I have had a lift in the back of an ambulance twice.


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## mark st1 (11 Aug 2016)

Just abandon the bike and run. If it's good enough for the pro's.


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## Tin Pot (11 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> The answer is simple - get married!
> 
> A wife / SO is an integral part of the tool kit!



Mwahaha.

wife pick me up if I had a puncture? Mwahaha!


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## welsh dragon (11 Aug 2016)

I don't have a wife either and Mr WD doesn't ride a bike, so I don't have anyone to phone either. So A) fix the problem myself or B) abandon my bike, walk home and get my car.and collect my bike.


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## Tin Pot (11 Aug 2016)

fossyant said:


> I've only ever called home once after a rim exploded. Not bad in 30 years. I have had a lift in the back of an ambulance twice.



That's more like it. Phone the wife if you've been hospitalised, but only if you think you can't get out and home before she notices how late it is.


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## ufkacbln (11 Aug 2016)

Tin Pot said:


> Mwahaha.
> 
> wife pick me up if I had a puncture? Mwahaha!



Part exchange????


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## ufkacbln (11 Aug 2016)

welsh dragon said:


> I don't have a wife either and Mr WD doesn't ride a bike, so I don't have anyone to phone either. So A) fix the problem myself or B) abandon my bike, walk home and get my car.and collect my bike.



More seriously.....

When you design your commute, look at the "Safety points" and "Convenience points"

These may be a Bus Shelter where it is worth walking 100 yards to fix a puncture in the dry

It could be pub where there is a smoking shelter where you can have a pint and carry out a repair.

It could be somewhere you could safely leave your bike overnight, or for the time it takes to arrange a lift home

Only you know tyour skills, your commute ad what you need


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## User33236 (11 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> The answer is simple - get married!
> 
> A wife / SO is an integral part of the tool kit!


Easier, and cheaper in the long run, to get recovery insurance . E.g ETA's offering at £18 per annum.


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## steveindenmark (11 Aug 2016)

I wouldnt dream of going out without a repair kit. I can get it fixed and grt going without bothering anyone and probably quicker than they can get to me.

Isnt fixing a puncture the most basic of maintenence. If we cant do that we need to find another hobby.


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## ufkacbln (11 Aug 2016)

User33236 said:


> Easier, and cheaper in the long run, to get recovery insurance . E.g ETA's offering at £18 per annum.



I used them when I was younger and less skilled and it is a valid option.

However they tend to use breakdown services as opposed to bike services

I had great fun filling out the forms afte r one call

Gear box - manual
Engine Capacity - 4 pints of Ruddles

You can imagine the rest


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## Cycleops (11 Aug 2016)

mark st1 said:


> Just abandon the bike and run. If it's good enough for the pro's.



I thought they just pinched one from a rival team.


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## guitarpete247 (11 Aug 2016)

GF has just told me. If I didn't tell her I'd had an accident she'd kill me.


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## numbnuts (11 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> The answer is simple - get married!
> 
> A wife / SO is an integral part of the tool kit!


Had one of them once never again, I'd sooner walk.


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## Stevec047 (11 Aug 2016)

Single here so have to rely on my limited knowledge and ability to tinker.

Having said that I am sure my boys mum would get me out of a sticky situation.

The other thing I have questioned is who do I add as next of kin my 4 year old and 2 year old won't be much help in an accident so do I ask the ex if she is happy to be added or not?


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## Bazzer (11 Aug 2016)

Unless the waste matter has really hit the fast spinning blades, I wouldn't be ringing my better half. 
Thinking about it, the two times I have tried to ring her after accidents, she didn't answer.


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## lutonloony (11 Aug 2016)

i suffered an exploding RD with no tools. No phone so a 4 mile walk home down busy country rd. Mrs L decided to come out looking for me as I was so late home. Sadly she drove round the roundabout as I was in the underpass, so I was home whilst she looked for me for 30 mins without her phone. How she laughed when she got back!


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## Supersuperleeds (11 Aug 2016)

I've called the support team out twice, once was the first winter I used ice tyres and I got a puncture on the way home, I decided it was way too cold to try and fix it roadside. Only a couple of miles from home

Second time (also on ice tyres) my chain snapped 48 miles into a 100 miler. 10 miles from home, got home jumped on another bike rode out to where the chain snapped and finished the ride.


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## simongt (11 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> The answer is simple - get married!



Ahh, but as I suggested in the original post, my GLW has by choice, never learned to drive and she has no desire to start - !


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## toddmeister (11 Aug 2016)

simongt said:


> Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife



You can have mine if you want? She's no trouble.....honest


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## CanucksTraveller (11 Aug 2016)

I don't understand this preference for phoning for assistance, it's got to be the worst of all worlds in most situations. The majority of problems out and about are tyres, so you flat, you decide to phone your dearest, she or he may be on the way within 5, at your location in another 10 or 20 at best, maybe much, much more... then on arrival you have to pack the bike into the car, and then drive the same distance home with the ride finished. I'm shite at changing a tube quickly and yet even I'm confident that I can get going again in ten minutes or so and the day's not spoiled.

Granted, you may get a more serious issue in serious weather and then the lift home becomes attractive (even critical), but for a tyre? Hand in the man card as you enter the vehicle sir.


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## Sharky (11 Aug 2016)

Think I've had to phone for help about 4 times
- When I was about 14, in 1964 with a friend and after about 70 miles on a 90 mile ride, we both were exhausted
- About 20 years ago, on my 23 mile commute home in the winter after a couple of punctures in the freezing cold was shivering and weak and had to shelter in a phone box until rescued.
- About 10 years ago on a club run and noticed that my rear triangle has rusted through and broken.
- And about 8 years ago - I called my wife "I'm OK, I'm in an ambulance - can you pick me up from Maidstone A&E"


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## Gert Lush (11 Aug 2016)

I've rung for help twice, both times because I'd bonked. One I was a good 25miles away from home, halfway round a 50mile loop. The second time was rather embarrassing, I was following another person gps ride and didn't know where I was. Turns out I was about 1mile from my house.

I've since learned to eat while riding.


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## Pat "5mph" (11 Aug 2016)

I don't have neither wife nor car, but I do have Marathon tyres 
If I go any route that takes me in the middle of nowhere I carry the necessary.
I figure if I carry the tool and can't manage the repair, another cyclist maybe can.
Of course I can change an inner, but I don't kid myself on that I could do it with frozen hands in the dark, so in winter I don't ride alone on a remote routes.


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## Pat "5mph" (11 Aug 2016)

Stevec047 said:


> .
> The other thing I have questioned is who do I add as next of kin my 4 year old and 2 year old won't be much help in an accident so do I ask the ex if she is happy to be added or not?


This is a bit of a problem: I used to put the name of my cat as an emergency number to avoid telling people a long sob story about myself 
I have now given my house keys to a neighbourgh and got some dog tags made.
Numbers on the tags are the neighbourgh's and a couple of close friends.


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## shouldbeinbed (11 Aug 2016)

I've rung twice, once after being hit and run to tell her I wasn't going to make it to Bro in Law's birthday party on time bit was still alive. 2nd time was the first failure of the POS Sturmey hub gear I have on my Birdy.


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## shouldbeinbed (11 Aug 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> I don't have neither wife nor car, but I do have Marathon tyres
> If I go any route that takes me in the middle of nowhere I carry the necessary.
> I figure if I carry the tool and can't manage the repair, another cyclist maybe can.
> Of course I can change an inner, but I don't kid myself on that I could do it with frozen hands in the dark, so in winter I don't ride alone on a remote routes.


You be surprised how much help a pair of latex gloves makes to cold wet hands for winter fixing, but keeping to safe sensible routes is smart.


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## nickyboy (11 Aug 2016)

Just once. About 15 miles from home in the countryside I punctured and the replacement tube had a faulty valve so wouldn't inflate. It was either a call home or a call for a taxi. Handily there was a pub to wait in just up the road


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## Smokin Joe (11 Aug 2016)

The big problem can be the other half actually finding you. Ok if you're in a town or city and you can tell them the name of the road, but if you are 30 miles away on an unclassified road then you probably only have a vague idea of where you are yourself, let alone trying to tell someone else the exact location. I had enough trouble with that a few years ago when a water hose blew on my car in the back of beyond and I had to give directions to the AA.


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## Apollonius (11 Aug 2016)

Being myself a



simongt said:


> a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike



I have recently come across a couple of blokes on Cirrus type things, one with a broken chain. I stopped to offer assistance, but could not help as I only carry 10 and 11 speed links. The non-lycra clad rider had already phoned wife anyway. 

The second time appeared to be a rear-changer in the wheel. His mate was pushing him home. Neither were wearing Lycra. I knew what to do, but my help was declined as they were nearly home. Maybe they assumed as I was riding a road bike and wearing lycra I wouldn't have a clue. I have come across this prejudice. Oh, and I was also riding a comparatively expensive bike, which obviously marks me out a clueless too.


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## Pat "5mph" (11 Aug 2016)

Try being a woman on a hybrid with flowery panniers and offering help to a couple of roadies stopped at the roadside.
You should have seen the look on their faces!
Little did they know that I was just back from a Belles ride, my panniers had an entire workshop in them, to cover all prospective catastrophes, because I was the only one knowing the difference between a chain link and a chain ring


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## Stevec047 (11 Aug 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> This is a bit of a problem: I used to put the name of my cat as an emergency number to avoid telling people a long sob story about myself
> I have now given my house keys to a neighbourgh and got some dog tags made.
> Numbers on the tags are the neighbourgh's and a couple of close friends.


That actually sounds like a great idea I may have to put that to a good freind of mine and see if he would be willing to be my ice


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## Pat "5mph" (11 Aug 2016)

Stevec047 said:


> That actually sounds like a great idea I may have to put that to a good freind of mine and see if he would be willing to be my ice


Mind to tell your friend the name of the solicitor that has your will


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## Stevec047 (11 Aug 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> Mind to tell your friend the name of the solicitor that has your will


A will lol I don't have anything to my name save for a tiny bit of money in savings my car and bike. I reckon the cost of a will would out do the actual value of my personal items


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## doog (11 Aug 2016)

simongt said:


> Being that sort of person, whenever I see a fellow cyclist apparently in trouble, I always stop and offer assistance. What I find interesting is that when it's a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike, my offer of assistance is invariably politely declined with a statement to the effect of '..It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife / partner / girlfriend / the other 'arf and she's picking me up..'
> Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife / partner / girlfriend / other 'arf, or they don't drive or there isn't a car available.
> So WE have to deal with whatever the situation is - !
> 
> Observations please - !




Most I come across are working on their p*unctures...never had the same reply as you..

I've rung the missus twice in 30 years..(last resort trust me ) snapped chain and broken spoke... gutted with the latter as I probably could have made it home but being 'lycra'd up' as you say I didn't want the appalling embarrassment of cycling (nursing) a broken wheel home at 8 mph...


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## lazybloke (11 Aug 2016)

steveindenmark said:


> I wouldnt dream of going out without a repair kit. I can get it fixed and grt going without bothering anyone and probably quicker than they can get to me.



Totally agree- I'd never cycle anywhere without tools.

_Translation_: I do my own roadside repairs because my wife wouldn't offer a sympathetic response if I phoned her


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## Tim Hall (11 Aug 2016)

Smokin Joe said:


> The big problem can be the other half actually finding you. Ok if you're in a town or city and you can tell them the name of the road, but if you are 30 miles away on an unclassified road then you probably only have a vague idea of where you are yourself, let alone trying to tell someone else the exact location. I had enough trouble with that a few years ago when a water hose blew on my car in the back of beyond and I had to give directions to the AA.


Assuming both parties have a smart phone, then Glympse is your friend (I expect other apps are available). It sends location info to who you want, which will then pop up on whatever map stuff they have on your their phone.

Edit: changed your for their, so it makes sense now.


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## NorthernDave (11 Aug 2016)

Tim Hall said:


> Assuming both parties have a smart phone, then Glympse is your friend (I expect other apps are available). It sends location info to who you want, which will then pop up on whatever map stuff they have on your phone.



There is a similar function in BBM (BlackBerry Messenger). Never had to use it though, so I've no idea how accurate it is...


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## lutonloony (11 Aug 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> This is a bit of a problem: I used to put the name of my cat as an emergency number to avoid telling people a long sob story about myself
> I have now given my house keys to a neighbourgh and got some dog tags made.
> Numbers on the tags are the neighbourgh's and a couple of close friends.


I've always thought that in case of emergency contact......... Should be 999, to be honest I think they're much more likely to be able to help than Mrs L


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## r04DiE (11 Aug 2016)

I've been cycling for nearly 25 years, married for nearly 17 years, and have never called anybody, ever, for a lift home.


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## gbb (11 Aug 2016)

only ever once bailed and phoned for a pickup...punctured and fingers were just too numb with cold to do anything, plus with a howling cold wind I did worry I'd get far too cold.
Otherwise...a puncture should only take 15 minutes..like many I guess, I've fixed a good few at the side of the road .I've even pushed with one leg, the other on the pedal (like when you set off but dont swing your leg over the top bar) after losing a jockey wheel...did that for about 6 miles.
Generally I've been lucky...but I wouldn't use my phone as a first resort.


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## Accy cyclist (11 Aug 2016)

simongt said:


> Being that sort of person, whenever I see a fellow cyclist apparently in trouble, I always stop and offer assistance. What I find interesting is that when it's a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike, my offer of assistance is invariably politely declined with a statement to the effect of '..It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife / partner / girlfriend / the other 'arf and she's picking me up..'
> Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife / partner / girlfriend / other 'arf, or they don't drive or there isn't a car available.
> So WE have to deal with whatever the situation is - !
> 
> Observations please - !





I'm crap at punctures and other bike stuff, so if you're ever around these parts and you or anyone else offers me assistance YOU/THEY WILL NOT BE TURNED AWAY!!


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## rugby bloke (12 Aug 2016)

Phone the wife once - but that was for a lift to A&E after an unplanned dismount. As I was needing stitches in my lip there was a quite a lot of claret being split. When I walked into A&E a guy with a packet of tissues took one look at me and said - "Have these, you need them more than me." Started feeling better straight away.


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## GrumpyGregry (12 Aug 2016)

my mates take the pish at the tools and gubbins I carry. They pipe down, for a bit, when said stuff comes in handy to fix their, or anothers, bike.

I only phone home when I, or the conditions, are broken, not when the bike is bust.

Though there was that air ambulance in the alps that time....


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## iandg (12 Aug 2016)

Cycling since 1973 and don't remember ever having to contact anyone to be picked up.

It's going to happen this weekend now, isn't it?


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## The Mighty News (12 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> It could be pub where there is a smoking shelter where you can have a pint and carry out a repair.



This sounds the best option to me


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## iandg (12 Aug 2016)

wicker man said:


> Cycling since 1973 and don't remember ever having to contact anyone to be picked up.
> 
> It's going to happen this weekend now, isn't it?



Aah forgot - picked up three times from hospital following commuter accidents but never following a mechanical. The accident to hospital bit was in an ambulance on one occasion, I walked on another (I was about 500yds away and heading to work) and on the other occasion the accident happened on the hospital grounds where I worked, I came round in A&E that time.


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## smutchin (12 Aug 2016)

Stevec047 said:


> Single here so have to rely on my limited knowledge and ability to tinker.



Paging @Fnaar


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## smutchin (12 Aug 2016)

I have called for help a few times - eg once when I got caught in a blizzard at the top of Kirkstone Pass.

If it's a mechanical, I generally try to fix it and carry on if possible - once my rear mech disintegrated so I just shortened the chain to bypass it and rode home singlespeed. More recently, I wrecked my rear mech by shifting it into the wheel but as I was much closer to home and it was freezing cold and wet, I felt it was better to call for a lift and get back in the warm and dry asap. Wasn't close enough to home that I fancied walking it in cleats though.


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## Sara_H (12 Aug 2016)

guitarpete247 said:


> GF has just told me. If I didn't tell her I'd had an accident she'd kill me.


I once turned up to collect OH and bike from roadside after a crash. Ambulance man seemed a bit shocked when my first question was "Is your bike alright?".


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## youngoldbloke (12 Aug 2016)

simongt said:


> Being that sort of person, whenever I see a fellow cyclist apparently in trouble, I always stop and offer assistance.* What I find interesting is that when it's a lycra'd up bloke on a road bike, my offer of assistance is invariably politely declined with a statement to the effect of '..It's okay, I've 'phoned the wife / partner / girlfriend / the other 'arf and she's picking me up.*.'
> Now there are those of us who either don't have the benefit of a wife / partner / girlfriend / other 'arf, or they don't drive or there isn't a car available.
> So WE have to deal with whatever the situation is - !
> 
> Observations please - !


What I find interesting is what you are implying. I assume you don't ride a road bike, or wear lycra, or clothing that many of us regard as suitable for cycling? I think what you're wearing has F-all to do with it


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## r04DiE (12 Aug 2016)

youngoldbloke said:


> What I find interesting is what you are implying. I assume you don't ride a road bike, or wear lycra, or clothing that many of us regard as suitable for cycling? I think what you're wearing has F-all to do with it


FIGHT!


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## GrumpyGregry (12 Aug 2016)

youngoldbloke said:


> What I find interesting is what you are implying. I assume you don't ride a road bike, or wear lycra, or clothing that many of us regard as suitable for cycling? I think what you're wearing has F-all to do with it


Weekend full kit bankers always* refuse the help of merino clad plus two wearers like me. But I assume the team car comes along eventually**.

*Sample size of 6 or 7 survey undertaken in 2013 & 2014

**though one was still cooling his heels at the same spot well over an hour after he refused assistance when I came back along the same road.


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## mythste (12 Aug 2016)

I phoned me mum once. But only because I was cycling to see her, and in the process had fallen into a canal, and with 5 miles left to go until her house, found myself with 2 punctures.

It's a miracle I carried on cyclin gat all after that day! still sends a shiver down my spine


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## Markymark (12 Aug 2016)

User said:


> I've got your number....
> 
> 
> ...so next time I get a puncture guess who I'm calling? How quick can you get up to Cambridgeshire?


Which tube line is it on?


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## johnnyb47 (12 Aug 2016)

After reading this brilliant post it made me realise I should take some emergency items with me whilst out on a ride. As I'm getting more adventurous and travelling further afield and that I have no one to rely on if I had a problem I've opened the wallet today and bought a small seat post bag , inner tube , tyre levers and a small pump from Wiko,s. Total cost £ 12.29. It's not bad quality either and a no brainer. I really didn't fancy pushing the bike home 20 miles lol :-)


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## iandg (12 Aug 2016)

johnnyb47 said:


> After reading this brilliant post it made me realise I should take some emergency items with me whilst out on a ride. As I'm getting more adventurous and travelling further afield and that I have no one to rely on if I had a problem I've opened the wallet today and bought a small seat post bag , inner tube , tyre levers and a small pump from Wiko,s. Total cost £ 12.29. It's not bad quality either and a no brainer. I really didn't fancy pushing the bike home 20 miles lol :-)



A mobile phone's all you need


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## r04DiE (12 Aug 2016)

wicker man said:


> A mobile phone's all you need


Good luck in finding one of those for £12.29 though.


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## ColinJ (12 Aug 2016)

wicker man said:


> A mobile phone's all you need


You'll be needing a phone signal too! Plenty of the more interesting places round here don't have a signal ...



r04DiE said:


> Good luck in finding one of those for £12.29 though.


Tricky ... Well, it did take me 30 seconds to find THIS ONE for £7.99!


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## Diggs (12 Aug 2016)

Only once (wife was at work and doesn't drive anyway having lived in that London most of her life)
Standing there, both wheels kaput, blood stained gilet melted on gravel, working through my contact list.
Dad out on the beer.
Sister out shopping.
Eventually got through to a mum of one of the boys school friends. 
Managed to get both wheels off one handed to fit in a hatchback boot for a lift to the A&E


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## jonny jeez (12 Aug 2016)

youngoldbloke said:


> What I find interesting is what you are implying. I assume you don't ride a road bike, or wear lycra, or clothing that many of us regard as suitable for cycling? I think what you're wearing has F-all to do with it


That feeling that you get when you instantly see an issue with an OP but have to trawl right the the end of the bleedin thread, just to see that right on the last page someone has beaten you to it.

I was going to say, the answer is simple, the OP just needs to wear Lycra .

Sorted.


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## GrumpyGregry (12 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> You'll be needing a phone signal too! Plenty of the more interesting places round here don't have a signal ...


Somerset is the 1950's mobile signal wise.


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## Electric_Andy (12 Aug 2016)

I've foolishly never carried a repair kit. I've wheeled the bike home once, luckily it was only a mile. I've had a crank shear off before so I lashed one foot to the pedal with my shoe lace (MTB - no clips) and rode 7 miles home with one foot.

My wife would probably not rescue me because the bike might scratch her nice car. My father has rescued me with a car trailer before, but that was motorbike related.


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## Electric_Andy (12 Aug 2016)

I forgot to add, I also once had a puncture on my MTB - in those days there was no quick release and I didn't have a spanner. We tied the inner tube to the forks and stuffed the tyre with moss. it worked well at low speed, but downhills were quite bumpy.


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## Dogtrousers (12 Aug 2016)

Well, I was super lucky that my only prang that resulted in an unrideable bike involved me sliding to a halt in front of a Land Rover that was (a) specially emptied in preparation to help someone move house (b) going my way and (c) driven by a very nice helpful man.


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## Smokin Joe (12 Aug 2016)

User13710 said:


> Last night on the way home from the pub one of the women I was riding with got a puncture. Despite us all wearing lycra and riding road bikes, there was no mention at all of phoning anyone. Some men are just a bit pathetic .
> 
> View attachment 139098


Red socks.

Oh my Lord, what's the world coming to? Only ramblers should be seen in those.


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## ufkacbln (12 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> You'll be needing a phone signal too! Plenty of the more interesting places round here don't have a signal ...
> 
> 
> Tricky ... Well, it did take me 30 seconds to find THIS ONE for £7.99!


The cheapest tool kit is the one belonging to a passing tourist / commuter


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## r04DiE (12 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> You'll be needing a phone signal too! Plenty of the more interesting places round here don't have a signal ...


Good point!


> Tricky ... Well, it did take me 30 seconds to find THIS ONE for £7.99!


No, I mean a real mobile phone, that's not a mobile phone - it's like a child's toy phone


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## ColinJ (12 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> The cheapest tool kit is the one belonging to a passing tourist / commuter


And the most expensive one is the taxi that you get because no tourists or commuters with available toolkits seem to be passing!


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## ColinJ (12 Aug 2016)

r04DiE said:


> Good point!
> No, I mean a real mobile phone, that's not a mobile phone - it's like a child's toy phone


You don't need a QHD smartphone with a 30 megapixel camera, 64 GB of storage and a quad core CPU to phone for a lift!


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## John the Monkey (12 Aug 2016)

Never heard that, personally.

The folk I've encountered are normally well into their repair (aside from one poor chap whose freehub had gone, not much either of us could do about that). 

I've repaired one puncture for a chap who'd not done one before, and been rebuffed rather rudely once by a rider who blustered angrily that they had everything in hand. Generally, people tell me that they're ok/have the tools they need and thank me for stopping.

Maybe this is the new nodding/waving.


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## Globalti (12 Aug 2016)

I certainly wouldn't phone THE wife. 

I would phone my wfe though.


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## ColinJ (12 Aug 2016)

Globalti said:


> I certainly wouldn't phone THE wife.
> 
> I would phone my wfe though.


And you would use that cheapo bulletproof phone that you carry when out riding, wouldn't you!


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## ufkacbln (12 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> And the most expensive one is the taxi that you get because no tourists or commuters with available toolkits seem to be passing!



Patience.... 

There will be one along in a minute


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## screenman (12 Aug 2016)

I just do not get you guys, who on earth would go out without a team car following.


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## youngoldbloke (12 Aug 2016)

..... or a _domestique_


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## ufkacbln (12 Aug 2016)

youngoldbloke said:


> ..... or a _domestique_



How long before we get a tirade about a thread mentioning "wife" and "domestique" as being sexist?


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## r04DiE (12 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> You don't need a QHD smartphone with a 30 megapixel camera, 64 GB of storage and a quad core CPU to phone for a lift!


It's a toy - I wouldn't trust it. Sorry.


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## clid61 (12 Aug 2016)

Man up , if you wanna go out on your own be prepared to solve problems on your own .


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## clid61 (12 Aug 2016)

If you cant change a tube on the road you dont belong on it .


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## Globalti (13 Aug 2016)

ColinJ said:


> And you would use that cheapo bulletproof phone that you carry when out riding, wouldn't you!



No, I gave up on the £2.99 phone because the buttons were unmarked and I could never work the damned thing! So now I'm on another el-cheapo phone somebody gave me but GtiJ being a teenager, he always has his fancy iPhone with him so I don't even bother carrying mine when he's with me.


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## cyberknight (13 Aug 2016)

I have been picked up once so far when I had a double pinch puncture and only one tube when it was so cold the glue wouldn't work.(lesson learned).I have walked 8 miles home as my commute has no busses etc and shift work means no one about on country lanes.


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## outlash (13 Aug 2016)

Markymark said:


> Which tube line is it on?



Well, you've got a choice of two lines that may occasionally pop in and out of tunnels. One which was closed for a portion of the day yesterday because of a car being hit by a train on a level crossing, or the other where they cancel trains whenever they see fit. Still, at least when you are actually able to get on a train, you can stand up without having to stoop.


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## Nebulous (13 Aug 2016)

I don't see the point in going through a survival routine if you don't have to. If an emergency lift is available and you need it then use it. I do most of my riding alone in rural locations and carry a limited amount of repair kit. I can think of three times I've called for a lift in 5 years and around 15,000 miles. 
1. Three punctures on the same ride. I got two in the same spot, replaced both tubes and 20 miles later got a third. 
2. Broken spoke. Wheels with a low spoke count, rim catching the brakes I was concerned that I would damage it by continuing. 
3. Standing up on a steep climb. Hanger broke and RD wrapped itself round the spokes. Spoke damage, gouge to frame and chain stay. 

All of these were in sparsely populated areas over 10 miles from home. My wife will come, may grump about it a bit, but knows I'll drop what I'm doing to assist any of my family that need it. 

By the same token I've phoned the RAC / AA around 7 times in 1,000,000 miles of driving.


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## Pale Rider (13 Aug 2016)

Rear wheel punctures on my Brompton put me into lift territory.

Dealt with the first by taking a taxi to a nearby bike shop, the second involved a mile or so push back to my car.

A snapped pedal shaft on another bike when I was miles from home could have been another 'phone a friend' moment.

I was just able to pedal the bike a couple of miles to a bike shop.

Good thing it was flat, I don't think I could have managed hills with one foot pushing on the stump of the snapped shaft.

The moral of both these stories - for me - is always carry some cash, preferably with a credit card as back-up.


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## coffeejo (13 Aug 2016)

I did once wheel the bike to my LBS when I got a flat on a day that was so cold I was shivering. And had to phone a friend when the rear hanger snapped off, but by lucky coincidence I had just been past her house and was going uphill at the time so freeewheeled most of the way back to hers.


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## ColinJ (13 Aug 2016)

I don't have a partner to call. A couple of friends have told me to call them if I ever needed help but I wouldn't do that. 

I rode home nearly 5 miles one-legged after snapping a crank.

Another time I broke my saddle clamp and rode back standing up.

When a jockey wheel bolt fell out and disappeared, I converted my bike to a singlespeed at the roadside and rode home, spinning like crazy. 

My back wheel broke a spoke on a forum ride to Blackpool and became almost unrideable. I had to take the rear brake and mudguard off and then rode it 12 miles to Blackpool station to catch a train back.

I have blacked out on rides but still ridden home when I came round. If I had to call for help it would be for a taxi or an ambulance! Funnily enough, I ended up lying at the roadside (having suffered what turned out to be my second pulmonary embolism) and decided to do the sensible thing and dial 999 but found that I had no phone signal! After 20 minutes I started to feel better so I got back on my bike and rode home.


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## toffee (13 Aug 2016)

Just gone past someone this morning with a flat tyre on the phone to someone. Asked if he was Ok and got the yes so just carried on.

Derek


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## Tin Pot (13 Aug 2016)

toffee said:


> Just gone past someone this morning with a flat tyre on the phone to someone. Asked if he was Ok and got the yes so just carried on.
> 
> Derek



Cc forum should have a voicemail facility so that people can phone into this thread to admit they should have taken a spare with them.


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## ufkacbln (13 Aug 2016)

Globalti said:


> No, I gave up on the £2.99 phone because the buttons were unmarked and I could never work the damned thing! So now I'm on another el-cheapo phone somebody gave me but GtiJ being a teenager, he always has his fancy iPhone with him so I don't even bother carrying mine when he's with me.




IPhones have a bike repair App


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## palinurus (13 Aug 2016)

Never failed to make it home following a mechanical (although I've never had anything worse than a bit of a bent rim, cut tyre or a broken chain), once failed to get home due to injury- someone gave me a lift (with my bike) but they had to talk me out of riding home first.


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## Smokin Joe (13 Aug 2016)

I once got home with the forks pointing to one side after clouting a car that turned across the front of me. Being young and green at the time I didn't even get his name or reg number.


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## hondated (13 Aug 2016)

fossyant said:


> I've only ever called home once after a rim exploded. Not bad in 30 years. I have had a lift in the back of an ambulance twice.


I can relate to that as I had the same once but my wife was at work so I rang her to come and collect me. Long story short I walked the bike 9 miles and vehicles were passing me as I walked down hills and never stopped to ask whether I needed help but at the 9th mike a young fella did and took me home. The wife arrived an hour later enough said but we are still married.


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## simongt (13 Aug 2016)

youngoldbloke said:


> What I find interesting is what you are implying. I assume you don't ride a road bike, or wear lycra, or clothing that many of us regard as suitable for cycling? I think what you're wearing has F-all to do with it



It's simply how it happens. Non ' road bike lycra wearers ' invariably happily accept whatever help I can offer that will assist them on their way.
For the record, I ride a tourer and wear cycling tops and either touring shorts or tracksters according to weather / time of year. Oh and spd shoes / boots.


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## Pat "5mph" (13 Aug 2016)

clid61 said:


> If you cant change a tube on the road you dont belong on it .


What if you can't change a tube on the canal path?


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## clid61 (14 Aug 2016)

Pat "5mph" said:


> What if you can't change a tube on the canal path? [/QUOTE


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## clid61 (14 Aug 2016)

Dont ride on the canal you'll get wet or even next to it


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## tyred (15 Aug 2016)

Hands up who has used a large stone as a hammer to fettle their bike at the roadside?


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## si_c (15 Aug 2016)

Never called my wife as she doesn't drive, but have called my Dad twice
Once for a broken rear QR skewer which rendered the bike unusable and I was 10 miles from home and once when the tire sidewall exploded after the bead snapped.

Always offer help if I think it needed, never had anyone accept though, they all seemed to be OK.


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## jarlrmai (15 Aug 2016)

Called twice

Once broken chain that fell off the bike on a dual carriageway.
Once when I got knocked off and needed taking to hospital.


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## ColinJ (15 Aug 2016)

I didn't call for help last night but something very unusual happened while I was replacing a damaged tube - a couple driving past stopped to ask if I were ok and did I need any help! I have had cyclists offer help a few times in the past, but I can't remember motorists ever volunteering before!

Tip for the day: If you are offered a lift at dusk when fixing a bike at the roadside near a stream, take it before the midges find you ... I was, I didn't, they did - aaaargh ...!


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## stoatsngroats (15 Aug 2016)

I had a catastrophic chain/rear wheel incident whilst trying to get to a point 100m away to watch the Vulcan do its air display last year.after trying to fix 4 broken spokes and the chain, I decided to speak to the OH, who said I should walk the 4 miles home, so we did, taking turns to push the tandem. And this after a 46 mile ride we loved it


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## cd365 (15 Aug 2016)

I personally do not see the problem of phoning the wife, child or a mate if I needed picking up. Have done on weekend rides and will do again if need be. On my commute I fix and carry on.


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## Tim Hall (15 Aug 2016)

tyred said:


> Hands up who has used a large stone as a hammer to fettle their bike at the roadside?


No. But I have straightened someone else's bent axle by twatting it with a pickaxe handle that happened to by laying around.


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## John the Monkey (15 Aug 2016)

Tim Hall said:


> No. But I have straightened someone else's bent axle by twatting it with a pickaxe handle that happened to by laying around.


"....and that's how my fingerprints came to be present on exhibit A, m'lud."

Joking aside, roadside debris can be surprisingly useful. I use a metal rod I found on one commute to bodge my chain back on - much better than getting my fingers dirty, or relying on finding a suitably sturdy stick.


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## ufkacbln (16 Aug 2016)

A few years ago I met some teenagers, one of which had a derailleur that had been chewed by the spokes

They had 10 mile trip home, and parents couldn't help


Quick fettle, remove remains of derailleur, shorten chain and make it into a single speed to get them home... Spare parts in a crisp bag to take home, then used my phone to inform parents what we had done

Next thing was a call demanding I paid for the repairs as I had vandalised the bike


Luckily LBS doing the repairs explained that it was an appropriate roadside repair, and that nothing I had done had had any effect on the cost for repairing the original damage

Annoying though


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## Phil Fouracre (16 Aug 2016)

Bit of innovation a couple of days ago! Never had it happen before, but, seat post snapped!! Had to use the flattest stone in the wall I could find to grind down the edge of the remaining post so that it would fit. Like riding a bloody Noddy bike on the way home :-)


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## ColinJ (16 Aug 2016)

Cunobelin said:


> A few years ago I met some teenagers, one of which had a derailleur that had been chewed by the spokes
> 
> They had 10 mile trip home, and parents couldn't help
> 
> ...


FFS - what is up with some people! 

I was out on the local hills with my friend Carrie once when we encountered a stranded boy. His chain had come off on the inside of the cassette and jammed against the spokes. Carrie let him use her phone to call his parents and tell them what was going on. Meanwhile, I had managed to free the chain. I adjusted the derailleur endstop to stop it happening again. I told the boy to be careful on the way home in case his chain or spokes snapped. He said that he would get his dad to check everything properly when he got back. He was grateful, and his parents were _very_ grateful. I'd have been livid if they had got funny about me helping their son!


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## ColinJ (16 Aug 2016)

Oh, and as for helping children and '_What is up with some people?_' ...

I encountered another boy out 'on the tops' once. One of the jockey wheels on his rear derailleur had just fallen out. I stopped and helped him find the bits. Unfortunately, I had forgotten to take my multi-tool out with me that day, and the boy didn't have any tools with him so we didn't have any way of putting the thing back together. 

All was not lost - I spotted a group of 3 or 4 adult mountain bikers riding towards us. My attempts to ask them for help were completely thwarted, however. They ignored me and swerved either side of me and the boy and just carried on with their ride - selfish b@st@rds! 

I asked the boy where he was going. Fortunately, he was only about a mile or so from where his parents were parked, and it was at the end of the bridleway that we were on so he couldn't get lost. I asked if he was ok pushing his bike back to the car park and he said that he was.


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