# Cheam and Morden Hilly 50 March 6th 'The Most Ridiculous of all the Classics'



## dellzeqq (23 Dec 2009)

A date for your diary. A date with destiny....

http://cheamandmordenhilly50.blogspot.com/


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## MacB (23 Dec 2009)

I'm up for it and this time plan on getting to start before the start


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## Bollo (23 Dec 2009)

Hell yeah!


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## marinyork (23 Dec 2009)

If you don't have to have mudguards I might consider this.


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## Tynan (23 Dec 2009)

is this the one with 5 ditchlings?


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## Andrij (24 Dec 2009)

A perfect opportunity for a stroll; might even bring along my bike.

My participation depends on the progress of my training regime*, and possibly adding a dinner-plate sized cog on the back.


*Oi, you at the back, stop laughing!


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## Fab Foodie (26 Dec 2009)

Mmmmm...
Strokes chin and contemplates early season gut-buster...


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## DJ (2 Jan 2010)

Yes count me in.


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## Fab Foodie (2 Jan 2010)

I've started negotiations with the boss, and MIL seems OK for local (Morden!) accomodation...


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## Aperitif (2 Jan 2010)

Why do you need accomodation Fab? Abingdon isn't that far away for an allez / retour! 


www.bikehike.co.uk/mapview.php?id=29447


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## tornadotony (3 Jan 2010)

Is this all on road?


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## Fab Foodie (3 Jan 2010)

Aperitif said:


> Why do you need accomodation Fab? Abingdon isn't that far away for an allez / retour!
> 
> 
> www.bikehike.co.uk/mapview.php?id=29447



Wellllll
Because it's the lever to get the family down at the MIL's for the weekend so I can sneak out for a little pedal over the hills!
Kills 2 birds with one stone basically


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## dellzeqq (18 Feb 2010)

shameless bump. Numbers now staggering over the 50 mark, which is a little disappointing, but, once again, here's the blog

http://cheamandmordenhilly50.blogspot.com/


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## GrumpyGregry (18 Feb 2010)

It's the day after my splint comes off. It is almost on my doorstep. Why would I not be there. About the same amount of climbing as the Hell of Ashdown route but in half the distance of same.

What, apart from muscle atrophy from six weeks on crutches, is not to like about it?


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## Tynan (18 Feb 2010)

watching some youtube tdf climbs last night has rather snuffed out any interest here, the Bow flyover is no training at all


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## gbs (18 Feb 2010)

I think this will be too much vertical gain for my L knee but if next week's skiing does not confirm my fears I will enter or at least turn up for the finish. I may have a new bike with a triple by then and so would have an opportunity to road test.

PS I think I have successfully duplicated the route on ridewithGPS.com together with a turns list and a scary elevation chart - saved as Cheam&Morden hilly 50 km


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## Bollo (28 Feb 2010)

Shameful bump. Sorry Simon, negotiations have failed and I can't make this. F***ing boo!


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## stevevw (2 Mar 2010)

MacB said:


> I'm up for it and this time plan on getting to start before the start


Mac 
After last Saturdays little walk I am planning to get to the start just after the nick of time. 

Let me know if you still fancy a stroll around the lanes, we can meet up. The others I am going with will leave me at the first sign of an incline.


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## GrumpyGregry (2 Mar 2010)

^^ Oi, of the cc-ers I've bagsed the Lanterne Rouge ;-)

Will be doing it in amble mode  up ever slope more than 1 in 100


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## MacB (2 Mar 2010)

stevevw said:


> Mac
> After last Saturdays little walk I am planning to get to the start just after the nick of time.
> 
> Let me know if you still fancy a stroll around the lanes, we can meet up. The others I am going with will leave me at the first sign of an incline.



yep, I'm still game, though it will be slow and painful, amazing the difference a bit of time makes. Last time I cycled to and from the ride, the car's looking tempting this time


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## DJ (2 Mar 2010)

I have just organised all my family so that I can go on this, I am very much looking forward to the whole thing and look forward to seeing old and new faces again, its been a long hard slog commuting through the winter and the company of people to ride with and the leafy lanes of surrey is very enticing. Cant wait. 
Oh I am feeling rather unfit and my bike is still crap, but who cares!?
See y'all there.


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## Cayopro (2 Mar 2010)

GBS....

Thanks for the route mate, I have just put it on my Garmin, It seems ok so will get to try it on Saturday............ Result !!


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## Tim Hall (2 Mar 2010)

A late bit of reorganisation be me and others means I may well be able to join this ride the ride this year.

I am very pleased.


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## MacB (2 Mar 2010)

well just reprinted my directions from last year, but corrected one left to a right first, so hopefully will reach the start without the extra miles

Have also printed out the map and directions from the CTC SW London site. Teef and I got hopelessly lost last year, maybe if we stick to the map, and ignore the garmin, we'll be ok this time. I don't know if Teef will make this one but my added weight will make it feel like I'm carrying him round anyway

At present my plan is to be at cafe for about 0900, give me time to recover from ride over and enjoy some breakfast. Hopefully will be meeting at least Stevevw there.


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## GrumpyGregry (2 Mar 2010)

gbs said:


> PS I think I have successfully duplicated the route on ridewithGPS.com together with a turns list and a scary elevation chart - saved as Cheam&Morden hilly 50 km



Though we've not met, ta for the gps file which I'll stick on the old SD card and bring along to get lost by.


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## dellzeqq (4 Mar 2010)

you're all bonkers. The course is like a ploughed field, and the hills are completely horrible. I shall be marshalling in Dorking. With a cup of espresso to hand.


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## GrumpyGregry (4 Mar 2010)

slick shod mtb anyone? Then the mudguards, beard and sandals faction can attempt to stone me as I twiddle past riding through the potholes not around them.

Thinks... does any one else fancy waymarking the big holes to put on fillthathole?


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## des.o (4 Mar 2010)

Did a few sections of this Tuesday night - roads didn't seem too bad, looking forward to seeing it all in the sunshine. I'd forgotten how brutal Whitedown (and Leith) is, that 18% sign half way up is a cheery reminder of what's to come! Great sense of achievement at the top though. Looking forward to saturday - first ride in the sunshine for months.


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## DJ (4 Mar 2010)

At present my plan is to be at cafe for about 0900, give me time to recover from ride over and enjoy some breakfast. Hopefully will be meeting at least Stevevw there.[/QUOTE]



Hi Mac I will try and be at the cafe by around 0930, I will have breakfast at home but will definatley need a coffee by then so hopefully see you there.

Cheers 

DJ


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## iLB (4 Mar 2010)

gutted i can't make this, was flying around the peaks yesterday and tuesday, still i'm sure that an equal measure of pain will be received at my crit race on saturday morning for a more expensive entry price too!! (£15) !!


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## GrumpyGregry (4 Mar 2010)

MacB said:


> At present my plan is to be at cafe for about 0900, give me time to recover from ride over and enjoy some breakfast. Hopefully will be meeting at least Stevevw there.



Promise to come over and say "Hi" as ungrumpily as I can muster in a bikers cafe at 09:30 on a Saturday morning.



dellzeqq said:


> you're all bonkers. The course is like a ploughed field, and the hills are completely horrible. I shall be marshalling in Dorking. With a cup of espresso to hand.



Does the cat have any thoughts on the likely weather conditions during your espresso break?


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## clivedb (4 Mar 2010)

So the weather has improved and here's my chance to do something ridiculous, but I'm not going to be there after all - completely stuffed up with cold after avoiding swine flu, etc etc all winter. Hope to see you soon.


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## MacB (5 Mar 2010)

very frosty here this morning, I may have to consider driving to the start, I don't really want to do this ride on a 3 speed with studded Winter tyres


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## mistral (5 Mar 2010)

MacB said:


> very frosty here this morning, I may have to consider driving to the start, I don't really want to do this ride on a 3 speed with studded Winter tyres



Good to know it's notghing to do with ... 

"I weighed myself this morning, 29lbs heavier than the last time I did a night ride, and 14lbs more than on any social ride I've done"


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## Aperitif (5 Mar 2010)

MacB said:


> very frosty here this morning, I may have to consider driving to the start, I don't really want to do this ride on a 3 speed with studded Winter tyres



There's only room for one stud on a bicycle...

Have fun everyone. I'm 'hilling' very nicely.


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## MacB (5 Mar 2010)

mistral said:


> Good to know it's notghing to do with ...
> 
> "I weighed myself this morning, 29lbs heavier than the last time I did a night ride, and 14lbs more than on any social ride I've done"



you can go off someone you know


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## GrumpyGregry (5 Mar 2010)

the weather pastcast from metcheck for Dorking is basically Brrrrr!

09:00 = 0 degrees
12:00 = -1degree
15:00 = -6 degrees


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## Tynan (6 Mar 2010)

you lot enjoy, after pooh poohing this on the grounds of hills, i've been asked to take part in a Ventoux ride later this year, kismet I suppose


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## hatler (6 Mar 2010)

Just back. A great run. The sun shone, and Simon's assessment of the route as 'bordering on the horrendous' was a little OTT. There were holes, and one land slip, and one or two of the roads weren't exactly recognisable as such, but it was all passable.

Seemed like a good turnout and there were smiles all round at the finish.

And to top it all I beat my previous time by 18 minutes. Time for a cuppa and a hot bath.


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## DJ (6 Mar 2010)

Well, that was a fun day, everyone seemed very friendly and it was great to meet old faces. I've had a great work out even my neck is stiff from looking up hill. Some of the decents felt like I was literally fallling straight down.
Great to see Alistair at the start, and then at the top of the first hill I took a wrong turn and just kept going, finally caught up with the main group around Friday Street and made sure I didn't get lost again.

There was a degree of pain which fitted nicely with the degrees of ascent and the few degrees above freezing the weather was and also the degrees of seperation as I realised I had met more cyclests before than I had realised. The South London cycling fraternity is small.

Thanks organisers 3 quid well spent


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## des.o (6 Mar 2010)

Lovely day's riding, very friendly group and a nice early season reminder of how painful that combination of hills and a winter lay-off can be. Many thanks to Simon and the C&M organisers - great route/organisation/signing etc and ....price. All much appreciated.


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## MacB (6 Mar 2010)

Great to see people at the start, Steve and Dave especially, but I wasn't going to keep pace with anyone today. I believe I was actually overtaken by a small slug at one point. Got home hours ago but just surfaced kkkkkknackered would be a bit of an understatement. Still I'm consistent, yet to finish this ride. This time I didn't get lost but went left to Guildford after 17 miles, by the Bulls Head. Figured I had just about enough gas left to make it to Guildford station, it was close. I made it to the start without getting lost so my total for the day came in at a, very slow, 60 miles, but I'm just not coping with the hills. 

A wiser move might have been to drive to the start but I was goaded by Mistral and stupid enough to respond I'm shocked by how hard I've found certain hills that I went up no problem last year. Time for another significant improvement in fitness and power to weight ratio Unless I can ride up the hills I won't bother again, that's the only bit I enjoy, still hate the downhills with a vengeance.

One serious negative, after 43 miles of main, and fast country, road riding in getting to and from, I only expereinced one instance of poor driving. En route to Guildford I had a shockingly close overtake, nearly had me off the bike, from a car with a MTB on the top


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## dellzeqq (6 Mar 2010)

well done one and all - 143 riders, which is a decent turnout given that the weather has been so poor.


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## mistral (6 Mar 2010)

MacB said:


> Great to see people at the start, Steve and Dave especially, but I wasn't going to keep pace with anyone today. I believe I was actually overtaken by a small slug at one point. Got home hours ago but just surfaced kkkkkknackered would be a bit of an understatement. Still I'm consistent, yet to finish this ride. This time I didn't get lost but went left to Guildford after 17 miles, by the Bulls Head. Figured I had just about enough gas left to make it to Guildford station, it was close. I made it to the start without getting lost so my total for the day came in at a, very slow, 60 miles, but I'm just not coping with the hills.
> 
> A wiser move might have been to drive to the start but I was goaded by Mistral and stupid enough to respond I'm shocked by how hard I've found certain hills that I went up no problem last year. Time for another significant improvement in fitness and power to weight ratio Unless I can ride up the hills I won't bother again, that's the only bit I enjoy, still hate the downhills with a vengeance.
> 
> One serious negative, after 43 miles of main, and fast country, road riding in getting to and from, I only expereinced one instance of poor driving. En route to Guildford I had a shockingly close overtake, nearly had me off the bike, from a car with a MTB on the top



I'm impresed.

Despite this being my manor (almost) I didn't make it last year and I was unable to do it today due to family commitments, so I'm in no position to pass comment.

I know all these hills well, it must be leg & lung sapping to have to tackle so many in a relatively short distance.

Al, it's early in the season for such a monster, the fact you had a go is better than I've managed!


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## Aperitif (6 Mar 2010)

Yes, well done everyone who had a go. I'm puffed out typing this.


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## MacB (6 Mar 2010)

mistral said:


> I'm impresed.
> 
> Despite this being my manor (almost) I didn't make it last year and I was unable to do it today due to family commitments, so I'm in no position to pass comment.
> 
> ...



Dang, just when I get used to the idea of hating you, you go and say something nice


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## Cayopro (6 Mar 2010)

Does anyone have any pic's of todays Hilly 50 ride, be nice to see some on here !!!


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## Wowbagger (7 Mar 2010)

A great day out!

Belated Happy 80th to Simon's mother.

My ride report is here


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## Aperitif (7 Mar 2010)

Lovely description of a challenge Peter - well done!


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## Charlotte (7 Mar 2010)

Cayopro said:


> Does anyone have any pic's of todays Hilly 50 ride, be nice to see some on here !!!



I can do a little better than that 

http://bicycleslut.wordpress.com/2010/03/07/the-cheam-and-morden-hilly-50/


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## Aperitif (7 Mar 2010)

Charlotte said:


> I can do a little better than that
> 
> http://bicycleslut.wordpress.com/2010/03/07/the-cheam-and-morden-hilly-50/



Great stuff Charlotte! I liked the view of lane + blue sky and vapour trail at 4:36 - well done.


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## dellzeqq (7 Mar 2010)

Charlotte - relieved to see you walk up Friday Street - I've never, ever ridden up that hill.

As for the birthday....that's a bit embarrassing. I chose the Hilly 50 date, and, at the back of my mind a little voice saying 'you've forgotten something....'


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## Cayopro (7 Mar 2010)

Charlotte, That was great to relive some of those moments, just watched your Video footage even more suprised to see myself on it.....(Celeste Bianchi bike and matching jersey), ride completed in 2 & a half hours, how about you ? Great ride... many thanks


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## ianrauk (7 Mar 2010)

Great video and a bit of Hayseed Dixie to boot....


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## MacB (7 Mar 2010)

AdrianC said:


> I believe that it is possible to find cassettes that have cogs with more than 21 teeth nowadays. You really should give one a go.



and ruin his 'hard' London streetwise image? he wore shorts to the start on Saturday you know, then stood acting as a signpost in defiance of the cold. Had it not been for the presence of the delectable Susie, there could have been offers


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## zigzag (7 Mar 2010)

Enjoyed the ride. With low enough gearing (32") all hills were manageable - I wouldn't say easy, but not too hard either.


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## GrumpyGregry (7 Mar 2010)

I enjoyed it, even though I only rode half the route, and that the wrong way round, from the top of Ranmore! Still managed 67km on the bike on the day though, what with home-ryka's-ewhurst-home. My target was 50km but no rail services out of the 'Sham on the day meant a ride there and back and no way were my legs going to manage 100km at any decent speed from a near standing start. The look on Matt's face when he saw me coming down the hill north of Ewhurst as he was riding up it was a picture.


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## Tynan (7 Mar 2010)

fixed? dear god

mind you, 32t? dear god


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## MacB (7 Mar 2010)

well my lowest gear is 31" but I didn't even get to it, you know when the legs aren't going to co-operate any further. I saw no point in shuffling a few more yards before dismounting. 

My math is simple, me + lack of fitness + 2 stone extra = not enough power to weight ratio for success - the solution is even more simple, if a little painful


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## tanya g (8 Mar 2010)

Sorry for registering and not turning up, I went to set off in the morning to find I'd lost my saddle bag. I didn't want to risk a pucture in the middle of nowhere with no way to repair it. Maybe next time.


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## stevevw (8 Mar 2010)

Mac Glad you got back Ok. We waited for you at the top of the first or may have been the second hill for an age, thought we must of missed you so carried on. 

Had to get off twice even with the triple and mountain bike rear cassette. The first time was more that the front wheel kept jumping off the ground than the legs giving up, having said that they would have given out after a few more metres. The second time was on the hill with the pillbox this time my legs and worse my arms cried enough. In fact my arms hurt so much I had trouble pushing the bike up the hill luckily once back on the bike at the top they felt better. Had a bit of a Mouse moment at the end where we took the right fork instead of the left and descended the nice long hill in to Dorking at 41mph only to realise the error and then having to climb the 454' back up at closer to 4.1mph 
I am glad we went wrong as waiting for us at the turn was the lovely Handbag with Tim Hall and User10571. I think it was Tim that pointed out that if we had turned left at Dorking we would have had a nice flat ride to the foot of Box hill.  A few miles later half way up the Zig Zag the not so lovely handbag says "Gotcha" as she spins past on her nice new Condor, What pleasure she could have got from passing an Old Fat bloke going up a hill I have no idea.  You wait young lady one day I will meet you on the flat then we will see.


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## MacB (8 Mar 2010)

Tim, User10571 and Cat must have been fair shifting round the course then, I was a fair way in when they passed me and I would have been a country mile(or several) behind you by then. Though they were a little rude, didn't even offer to help dig a shallow grave for me

I did notice that Cat seemed to have a rather svelt beast under her. But I couldn't have identified it, our relative speeds being what they were


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## Tim Hall (8 Mar 2010)

(already posted elsewhere) 

A bit of a busy weekend. Camping Friday night, left the little darlings at early o'clock, rode a few miles home, found a clean pair of bib longs, go to the station. Train was delayed, but the connection to Deepdene had been held for us. Top marks.

Met, umm, mind's gone blank, a bloke from Cyclechat on the train and hooked up with matthew as we nipped up the A24. 

Big hello from Simon as we swung into carpark. Lots of familiar faces, but I couldn't name them all. A pair of Pikes, hatler, Charlotte, MacB, Dave whom I met on the old cars run, I'm sure I saw Life of Brian too, plus Mark and Mags from the Tandem Club. Sadly not on their Flying Gate. Simon mentioned User10571 was running late so I thought I'd hang on. Wow hove into view, and then hove out again, at Wowfactor 1. Simon then confused things by saying he'd seen User10571 signing in. I searched around but no sign, so thought I'd missed him. I hung around for a bit more with a view to shooting off, when he and Handbag turned up. We set off about 15 minutes after the bunch.

When I first met Handbag she was making good progress on a nice hybrid on an FNRTTC. She's got an even nicer bike now, and makes even better progress. I did spend a lot of time behind her.

We caught Wow as we left Dorking, having waved to to Suzy and his Leggship. We exchanged a few words and slightly guiltily pressed on. The bits of up we encountered were made more entertaining by having a had time shifting onto the granny ring. A bit of fettling improved, but didn't fix, the problem.

It got hotter as we went on, catching MacB on the run into Holmbury St Mary. He was a bit knackered, but then he had ridden from Farnborough. Madness I tell you. We swept (FSVO swept) up a few more riders as we ground up out of Ewhurst and were soon inching up Whitedown Hill. And then my phone went. One of my customers had broken a widget, was working that weekend and could I help. Bugger. A Cunning plan was hatched.

We had a quick chat with matthew who was fettling with a Redhill CC rider and then bumped into Steve and friend by the church on Ranmore Common. They'd misssed the turn, taken the hill down into Dorking and then ridden back up. How pleased they were to hear they could have turned left at the foot of the hill and found their way to Ryka's without busting their lungs.

I said goodbye to User10571 and Handbag as we got to the A24 and off to Deepdene. Then into Redhill, into the factory, into the van, with a widget, to J8 on the M1. Handover widget, back to Redhill, onto train as far as Gatwick, ride to home, ride to campsite at Pease pottage, freeze nuts off in sleeping bag.

All splendid fun.


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## Aperitif (8 Mar 2010)

What Condor has Kats got, Tim? A blingy, Fendi, Mulberry coloured object, or a 'Bag For Life' Fratello sort of thing?

And 'Life of Brian' can only mean Mr Fassa Bortolo? I thought I saw him at the beginning of Charlotte's video.


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## Tim Hall (8 Mar 2010)

I could be wrong (ask Mrs. Hall - I often am), but I think it was a mulberry coloured fratello. No mudguards, seemed to go uphill extremely well.

And [mode=dame Edith Evans]a handbag[/mode] hanging from the handlebars.

Yes, Life of Brian is Mr. Fassa Bortolo. Although I think he was riding for another team on Saturday.


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## Aperitif (8 Mar 2010)

Ta. Let's all do a 'bag run' this year...it's cool for Kats!


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## stevevw (8 Mar 2010)

I did not notice Kats handbag on her bike but it did appear once we got to the Café, probably difficult to carry now with drops.

I can confirm the bike as a Condor Fratello. Very nice too.


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## Wowbagger (9 Mar 2010)

dellzeqq said:


> Charlotte - relieved to see you walk up Friday Street - I've never, ever ridden up that hill.



Blimey! I've done it twice now, once on the Mercian and once on the Thorn.


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## Aperitif (9 Mar 2010)

Wowbagger said:


> Blimey! I've done it twice now, once on the Mercian and once on the Thorn.



'Morden once' then Wow!


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## MacB (9 Mar 2010)

Aperitif said:


> 'Morden once' then Wow!




How hard did you say you hit your head???


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## Aperitif (9 Mar 2010)

I walked into the bookie's without thinking this afternoon - you can tell I'm getting a little better.


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## GrumpyGregry (9 Mar 2010)

my fracture is so much better I'm going to have a second crack at the route on Saturday morning.


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