# 2013 Liggett and Sherwin'isms



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

Put your observations of their incompetence here, so we don't fill up the main Tour thread.


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

This is a difficult island to build roads on, apparently. Thank-you Mr Sherwen for that priceless bit of information.


----------



## fossyant (29 Jun 2013)

Its a bit craggy apparently, just like Noodley


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

Sherwen just said Cadel got better at the end of the Giro. I thought he was starting to fade towards the end?


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

I left the room for a brief period, but I am fairly sure I heard Sherwen quoting some bollocks about Napoleon as I was leaving the room...I am not sure which team he's on.


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

Noodley said:


> This is a difficult island to build roads on, apparently. Thank-you Mr Sherwen for that priceless bit of information.


I hope you didn't miss the bit about the signal tower and Napoleon.


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

Crackle said:


> I hope you didn't miss the bit about the signal tower and Napoleon.


 
I'm afraid I did (see post above)


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

'Logistical nightmare' from Sherwen, twice in 15 seconds


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

"85 towers...island dominated by the Moors...there's Lars Boom"


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

I am just off shopping to see if I can find some cold meats made from pigs fed on acorns...


----------



## threebikesmcginty (29 Jun 2013)

I haven't heard any if their bollox yet, my kids are still moaning about the tour being on the telly, a waste of electricity our kid said!


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> I haven't heard any if their bollox yet, my kids are still moaning about the tour being on the telly, a waste of electricity our kid said!


 
send them over here, try as I might I just cannot convince my kids to start arguing with one another to drown out Uncle Phil and his monkey.


----------



## fossyant (29 Jun 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> I haven't heard any if their bollox yet, my kids are still moaning about the tour being on the telly, a waste of electricity our kid said!



Thats a hanging offence.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (29 Jun 2013)

They got here early to park and now they can't leave until the roads reopen.

No shoot sherwin.


----------



## theloafer (29 Jun 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> I haven't heard any if their bollox yet, my kids are still moaning about the tour being on the telly, a waste of electricity our kid said!


kids ...that's what sheds or for ..


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

"In 1736 a boat took King Theodore from Corsica to Italy, which is not too far away". Tell us he didn't just fly?

Anyway, time t go shopping for that ham....laters


----------



## threebikesmcginty (29 Jun 2013)

King Theodore...mobile reception from Italy...2a and 2b...blah blah bollox...

Might have to put Eurosport on the 'pad.


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

And Flecha's gone, no one's following him.......oh no Boom has responded but has he left it too late......And Boom takes it.......

FFS, my dog could call it better


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

Geology lessons now........


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (29 Jun 2013)

fossyant said:


> Its a bit craggy apparently, just like Noodley


And if you rotated those 2 gs 180 degrees.....


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

The skinsuit bs again.....


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

And Jensie's name mispronounced for the _n_th time.


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

Did you know he's the oldest rider in the race?


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

Crackle said:


> Did you know he's the oldest rider in the race?


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

No joy in the hunt for special ham made by pigs fed on whatever it was they were fed on, so I had to make do with a couple of scotch pies


----------



## fossyant (29 Jun 2013)

No sign of the black and blue of sky. Oh they must have been listening as they are now at the front


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (29 Jun 2013)

StuAff said:


> The skinsuit bs again.....


Was that when Cav was rearranging his clothing? His skinsuit seems to be wrinkling up in the wrong places - that's the 2nd time he's been caught on camera playing with his derrière.


----------



## Chutzpah (29 Jun 2013)

"This is an interesting looking building in a great hillside location Paul, do you know anything about it?"
"Well actually yes, this is the....." [Pretends not to be reading it from a sheet of paper]

It was like listening to two Eurovision presenters playing off each other.


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

I've been away (searching for the special ham) so was just wondering if there has been any mention of the benefit of riding within the first 20...


----------



## fossyant (29 Jun 2013)

WTF was that flying rubber dinghy


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

fossyant said:


> WTF was that flying rubber dinghy


More interesting than the commentary.


----------



## Crackle (29 Jun 2013)

Noodley said:


> I've been away (searching for the special ham) so was just wondering if there has been any mention of the benefit of riding within the first 20...


and holding your line, nervous times, trust, final accelaration, years of experience, shoulder to shoulder, yadda yadda.......and the speed they're doing.....


----------



## StuAff (29 Jun 2013)

I may have missed someone pushing a big gear.....


----------



## Boris Bajic (29 Jun 2013)

I was in and out of the garden all aftrnoon; hedges, vegetable patch and weeds.

MotoGP (BBC Red Button) and TdF (ITV4) made a welcome respite from all that toil.

It was a dull MotoGP (apart from Valentinik winning again, Cal having a bloody good go and Jorge practically re-inventing masochism on his way to fifth... Largely processional,

I just tuned in and out of the TdF while resting and as always, I rather enjoyed the coverage and the commentary. I don't mind being told what I already know... And I don't mind silly mistakes. The race was what one might expect of a first day (sans prologue). The commentary was neither offensive nor amateurish.

I wonder whether the folk who moan about the commentators get some sort of schoolboy thrill from spotting the errors or statements of the obvious, mixed with a tinge of envy that the broadcasters don't ask_ them_.

Or is this thread what we used to refer to as a _'measuring of cocks'_ game, where I can find a worse error than you.

I've probably upset someone with that observation, but there is such a thing as taking sport on the telly too seriously. It's sport on the telly.


----------



## Noodley (29 Jun 2013)

Boris Bajic said:


> Or is this thread what we used to refer to as a _'measuring of cocks'_ game, where I can find a worse error than you...there is such a thing as taking sport on the telly too seriously. It's sport on the telly.


 
Did it ever occur to you that we might just be taking the piss out of them cos they are really crap?...there is no "measuring of cocks", merely observation that they are truly awful.

ITV4 have decided to pay to receive their commentary when there are many more talented commentators available to them, many of whom already provide commentary for other ITV4 cycle racing. I would imagine that Liggett and Sherwen's US-based employers may have had a contract with ITV4 covering several seasons, but their continued commentary in light of their promotion of St. Lance of Intravenous Transfusion, and their continued defence of him despite the USADA investigation, lessens ITV4 coverage. There is little I can do about this, other than take the piss out of them. It may be juvenile, but it's fun.


----------



## oldroadman (29 Jun 2013)

As well as S&L, a look at Eurosport today (where's Harmon, D?). Carlton Kirby when he gets excited is turning into the new Duffield, great fun. Sounds like one day he will explode. Which is unlikely with the first mentioned pair, who can bring a degree of flatness unsurpassed by almost anyone, except for the bloke who covers the Premier stuff for BC.


----------



## Chutzpah (30 Jun 2013)

Harmon announced he was taking some time out due to the stresses of being away from home, I believe since he's admitted to some depression. Best wishes to him.


----------



## pally83 (30 Jun 2013)

I liked the bit when they were obviously staring out of the window at busgate and almost completely missed the big crash... Why can't Imlach and Boardman do the job?


----------



## wakou (30 Jun 2013)

Surely anyone is better than Hugh "tapping out a rhythm Porter" ?


----------



## TVC (30 Jun 2013)

wakou said:


> Surely anyone is better than Hugh "tapping out a rhythm Porter" ?


Porter and Liggett, now there's a combination, they could work together doing bit and bit.

Sherwin could always get a job reading Lonely Planet guides out loud, he seems quite practiced at it already.


----------



## Crackle (30 Jun 2013)

...and Boom takes it for the 2nd day running...

Yep, he did and just like yesterday, you called everyone but him.


----------



## Noodley (30 Jun 2013)

Crackle said:


> ...and Boom takes it for the 2nd day running...
> 
> Yep, he did and just like yesterday, you called everyone but him.


 
Although Sherwen did say "and Boom takes it, that's Boom; that's his name you know" yesterday - just in case anyone thought he was doing an audio description of the old Batman TV series. I'm waiting for Kerpow to making a showing in the mountains...


----------



## Speicher (30 Jun 2013)

Noodley said:


> Although Sherwen did say "and Boom takes it, that's Boom; that's his name you know" yesterday - just in case anyone thought he was doing an audio description of the old Batman TV series. I'm waiting for Kerpow to making a showing in the mountains...


----------



## Noodley (30 Jun 2013)

"There's Danny van Poppel; to my reckoning he's the youngest rider to take part in the Tour de France since the 2nd World War". Yeh Paul, I'm sure that's not written down for you. Nobber.


----------



## Noodley (30 Jun 2013)

"Being on closed roads allows them to get up to 80 kilometres per hour" Funny that, I manage faster on non-closed roads...


----------



## fossyant (30 Jun 2013)

The commentry is aimed at nobbers. We are all nobbers.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (30 Jun 2013)

Napoleon grew up here until he was old enough to leave and then he left.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (30 Jun 2013)

"The riders stay off the main road on that little road over to the far right"

Wonder if he means the one with all the people riding bicycles on, the one that's quite clearly farking visible.


----------



## Crackle (30 Jun 2013)

Completely called the lead two on the attack wrong, unbelievable


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (30 Jun 2013)

''...the main field are boring...''

No, *bearing* down on [insert incorrect name].... 3 times he changed bearing to boring!


----------



## iLB (30 Jun 2013)

Yesterday the riders were taking "electric drinks" out of their musette bags.

Today I synced the eurosport commentary from my laptop with the itv4 pictures. Great success.


----------



## StuAff (30 Jun 2013)

I'm pretty sure Sherwen said Froomey was riding electrical chainrings....


----------



## Crackle (30 Jun 2013)

iLB said:


> Yesterday the riders were taking "electric drinks" out of their musette bags.
> 
> Today I synced the eurosport commentary from my laptop with the itv4 pictures. Great success.


tell me how: I'll pay you!


----------



## iLB (30 Jun 2013)

Crackle said:


> tell me how: I'll pay you!


Well...

First go to cyclingfans,com and select a satisfactory eurosport stream. Begin streaming, see terrible image and hear audio perfectly.

Second, turn on your television set and turn to ITV 4. Hear drivel. Hit mute. Using your Sky + box (other TV recording boxes are available) press pause. Resume playback when the picture of the eurosport feed matches what's on the tv. They are usually about 8 seconds delayed. Laptop audio, tv pictures. It works because all the images come from ASO or French tv I guess.

Hope this helps.


----------



## oldroadman (30 Jun 2013)

Or just watch Eurosport? Has Mr Sherwen mentioned that anyone is "turning himself inside out" yet? Very messy when that happens. Carlton Kirby is doing a good job and he's got the Duffield/Murray Walker getting excited voice which works well at the crucial climbs and finishes. Add in the sane and sensible comments of Sean K, and the question would be, if you have a Sky box, why bother with ITV4.
I guess we should be pleased that it's on terrestrial, all it needs is quality commentators who relate to the British viewer, not provide a feed that is probably meant for US consumption?


----------



## Noodley (30 Jun 2013)

The pair of them got today's winner wrong, and blamed it on Race Radio giving the wrong name - despite there being close-ups of the winner for quite a considerable distance. Just all-round piss-poor. Do your fecking jobs properly or ship out you dicks!!


----------



## line71 (30 Jun 2013)

"Froome, with his doublet all unbraid
No hat upon his head; his stockings foul’d,
Ungerter’d, and down-gyved to his ankle;
Pale as his shirt."
In reverential memory of this, many gentlemen in the peloton today wear loose socks barely covering their ankles.
How did Froome support himself in Corsica?
"Thrift, thrift, Horatio! The funeral bak’d meats
Did coldly furnish forth the marriage tables."

Probably the most diabolical Ligget/Commentary in the history of televised sport


----------



## crisscross (30 Jun 2013)

I must be the exception to the rule ( as per usual) but I quite like the stoopid comments - and can't afford Eurosport.

However, I too was mystified by the electrical chainring - is having an engine not against any minor rules in cycling - and i fnot - where can I get one?!


----------



## Peteaud (30 Jun 2013)

Eurospot player here, good value and good pic on the laptop at £4.00

My TV hates itv4 as the dire signal we get just breaks up.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (30 Jun 2013)

Just watching the highlights show, those f*cking jokers are making the same basic errors they made earlier today, will they never learn...


----------



## theloafer (30 Jun 2013)

watched eurosport free from here... http://www.bestsportgo.tv/20130131/vv510a6315e2152626115287-493129.html


----------



## Noodley (30 Jun 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> Just watching the highlights show, those f*cking jokers are making the same basic errors they made earlier today, will they never learn...


 
You may jest, however the commentary on the highlights show is sometimes different than the live commentary. Maybe they swap it for the other national commentaries when editing if there is a particularly bad Liggett/Sherwen commentary moment - how they identify the really bad from the run-of-the-mill bad is beyond me tho...maybe they have just given up doing it now, but they have done this in the past


----------



## threebikesmcginty (30 Jun 2013)

Noodley said:


> You may jest, however the commentary on the highlights show is sometimes different than the live commentary. Maybe they swap it for the other national commentaries when editing if there is a particularly bad Liggett/Sherwen commentary moment - how they identify the really bad from the run-of-the-mill bad is beyond me tho...maybe they have just given up doing it now, but they have done this in the past



I wasn't paying that much attention!!!


----------



## sheddy (30 Jun 2013)

Liggett interview http://www.itv.com/tourdefrance/features/40-years-of-phil-liggett/


----------



## Crackle (30 Jun 2013)

I used to like shigget and Lerwin. Once they defined the tour for me. I sought out their voices when Channel 4 ditched Le Tour.

I look back on those naive days with the fondness and inaccurate fumbling that Boris brings to his replies but alas, alack, I am forever changed now.


----------



## oldroadman (30 Jun 2013)

sheddy said:


> Liggett interview http://www.itv.com/tourdefrance/features/40-years-of-phil-liggett/


 After 40 years service people used to retire and get a gold watch, anything to make space for younger workers. Seemed like a good scheme.....


----------



## thom (2 Jul 2013)

oldroadman said:


> After 40 years service people used to retire and get a gold watch, anything to make space for younger workers. Seemed like a good scheme.....


Liggett just said Stuart O'Grady moved from Monaco to Luxembourg because he wanted his family to grow up in a more _varied_ place. Nothing to do with Luxembourg being another tax haven then...
Liggett should be part of the truth and reconciliation proceedings that cycling needs too.


----------



## Mad Doug Biker (2 Jul 2013)

*Commenting on the Orica Greenedge Team Celebrating at the finish line in today's Team Time Trial*

'If it wasn't so politically incorrect, I'd say that they all look like a bunch of convicts!'


----------



## zacklaws (2 Jul 2013)

Mad Doug Biker said:


> *Commenting on the Orica Greenedge Team Celebrating at the finish line in today's Team Time Trial*
> 
> 'If it wasn't so politically incorrect, I'd say that they all look like a bunch of convicts!'


 
Gary Imlach quoted that, not Liggett or Sherwin!

The only thing that gets on my tits is, when they convert kilometers into Miles incorectly, like today on the time trial, Liggett quoted "they are doing 59kph which is over 40mph", which is totally incorrect. But if I could not do the conversion in my head in an instant, I'd probably never notice the errors.


----------



## Doseone (2 Jul 2013)

Ned Boulting (to David Millar): "so the race really starts tomorrow"
David Millar: "no Ned, it started on saturday"


----------



## Archie (2 Jul 2013)

No-one noticed this one from yesterday? Apparently Rein Taaramae comes from a country called "Estona". 

And today's amusement was every team were "just going to beat, oh no they're just outside" the time of Omega Pharma Quickstep. Everyone except Orica Greenedge.


----------



## Crackle (2 Jul 2013)

Doseone said:


> Ned Boulting (to David Millar): "so the race really starts tomorrow"
> David Millar: "no Ned, it started on saturday"


I do enjoy the Boardman-Bolting double act though. Tonight's time trial position had me guffawing.


----------



## Doseone (2 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> I do enjoy the Boardman-Bolting double act though. Tonight's time trial position had me guffawing.


 

Yes, I really like them too. I always enjoy the podcast they do, they can be quite a double act.


----------



## Crackle (2 Jul 2013)

Doseone said:


> Yes, I really like them too. I always enjoy the podcast they do, they can be quite a double act.


Where's the podcast. You told me last time but that was like.............a year ago. A few more memory cells have died since then?


----------



## Doseone (2 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Where's the podcast. You told me last time but that was like.............a year ago. A few more memory cells have died since then?


 

Here on Itunes, it's really good.

I can't remember what I had for breakfast, let alone what someone told me a year ago


----------



## Crackle (2 Jul 2013)

Doseone said:


> Here on Itunes, it's really good.
> 
> I can't remember what I had for breakfast, let alone what someone told me a year ago


Ah, evil itunes, that's why I couldn't remember. I'll have to negotiate with a tetchy teenager now.


----------



## Doseone (2 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Ah, evil itunes, that's why I couldn't remember. I'll have to negotiate with a tetchy teenager now.


 
There is a non Itunes version as well - if you are Android then download Podkicker and get it from there - that's how I get mine. There is a link on the ITV4 Tour page to the non Itunes version but I'm just getting the document tree when I click that link.


----------



## iLB (2 Jul 2013)

I have no idea how they still leave it like that, with the document tree, but it still works. http://downloads.itv.com/podcasttdf.xml

Find the urls that are in blue and end in .mp3, copy and paste into a new tab and it will play!


----------



## rich p (2 Jul 2013)

What effing language are you all talking?
Estonan?


----------



## Noodley (3 Jul 2013)

Every fecking time trial, every fecking year, they seem to think the finish line is several hundred yards closer and call a potential new fastest time...only for whoever it is to trundle home over 20 seconds slower. Dicks.


----------



## The Couch (3 Jul 2013)

zacklaws said:


> ...they are doing 59kph which is over 40mph...





Noodley said:


> ... they seem to think the finish line is several hundred yards closer and call a potential new fastest time...


 
Yeah, but if they are doing over 40mph, they should be setting the fastest time


----------



## laurence (3 Jul 2013)

Doseone said:


> Ned Boulting (to David Millar): "so the race really starts tomorrow"
> David Millar: "no Ned, it started on saturday"


 
Boulting admitted on Twitter he'd been done by Millar,
"Appropriately put away by @*millarmind* today. No complaints. The problem with Dave is, if you ask a silly question, you get a smart answer."


----------



## Muguruki (3 Jul 2013)

Do Liggett and Sherwen both think Geraint Thomas is French? Strange way to pronounce his name.


----------



## youngoldbloke (3 Jul 2013)

Phil ..... 'breaking wind for him just now' (so that he can get through)


----------



## wakou (3 Jul 2013)

"Geraint Thomas, who last year, forgot.... forgone...... forgave................... the TdF to concentrate on the Olympics"


----------



## Boris Bajic (3 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> I used to like shigget and Lerwin. Once they defined the tour for me. I sought out their voices when Channel 4 ditched Le Tour.
> 
> I look back on those naive days with the fondness and inaccurate fumbling that Boris brings to his replies but alas, alack, I am forever changed now.


 
This suggests (as I guessed) that this thread is indeed a measuring of cocks as much as it is anything else.

There was no Channel 4 when the TdF first drew my glance. I gleaned what I could from_ l'Equipe_ and Radio, despite my very workmanlike French in those days.

I am nobody's expert on this topic and am happy that someone might describe my views as 'inaccurate fumblings'. I enjoy these threads and learn from some of the views thrown out here, but I find the unhelpfully competitive and comparative geekery slightly undignified.

As in all things in life, anyone who professes to know or care more than I do is an incurable geek and anyone who knows or cares less is beyond my help.

For all the protestations, there are suggestions in the way that posts have been couched this and last year that there is (among some posters) a sort of chain-olied-geek-fury at the effrontery of ITV4 for employing these chaps.

I've just come in from the garden to catch the end of the stage on the telly. This was not an option twenty years ago and I revel in its possibility today. They could have one of those clockwork tin monkeys clattering cymbals together doing the commentary and I'd be happy - and the subtitles would tell me enough... Doubtless others would find cause to complain about that.... Pffffffffff.... 

Yours ever,

:troll:


----------



## Crackle (3 Jul 2013)

"green ball....ball, cannonball...Cannondale..."


----------



## rich p (3 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> "green ball....ball, cannonball...Cannondale..."


Rock on Tommy (V)


----------



## Chutzpah (3 Jul 2013)

Ha, I also came on here to mention the "Cannonball" instead of Cannondale moment. About five seconds later he also said "Omega Pharma Quickstop"


----------



## Noodley (3 Jul 2013)

Boris Bajic said:


> For all the protestations, there are suggestions in the way that posts have been couched this and last year that there is (among some posters) a sort of chain-olied-geek-fury at the effrontery of ITV4 for employing these chaps.



And what the feck has that to do with cock-waving? I have already explained my position re them. They are a disgrace and have no place in modern cycling after their years of sucking up to Armstrong. If you don't like my views then too bad.


----------



## rich p (3 Jul 2013)

I don't read your posts Boris, they're just too long and too boring and too self-indulgent but seeing the section that Noodley has quoted has alerted me to the fact that you clearly know damn all about Sherwen and Liggett's history of slavering over Armstrong and denying his doping even when it was evident to all. Not to mention Liggett's attacks on USADA during the whole process and not to mention the fact that Armstrong, Liggett and Sherwen were linked in a financial arrangement. They should be nowhere near a microphone for many reasons but incompetence is only one of them.


----------



## laurence (3 Jul 2013)

did anyone watch the Broom Wagon thing that Boulting and Boardman did tonight? very funny show with a great cameo from Cav. such a shame those other 2 numpties are doing the main show.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (4 Jul 2013)

LeGit blathering on about Cav not having enough time to catch the peloton before the end of the race after his off, less than 3 minutes later he's back!


----------



## Hont (5 Jul 2013)

I note that ITV have ditched the segment where Phil and Paul answer questions from the public. Maybe too difficult to find that "what do the riders eat" question that they answer every year in amongst the deluge of Pharmstong-denier emails?


----------



## Noodley (7 Jul 2013)

They got all in am muddle today with the history of the Roche/Martin family trees: first we had the announcement that "Nicolas Roche is the son of Stephen Roche, who won the Tour in 1987"; then it was the revelation that "Dan Martin is the nephew of Stephen Roche, who won the Tour in 1987"; and then we had the real humdinger from Sherwen of "Dan Martin is Nicolas Roche's brother-in-law, err no I mean his cousin" - I think it was too much for him to work out what relation he'd be to Stephen Roche, winner of the Tour in 1987, if he was the cousin-in-law of his brother's dog, so he then told us that Martin's dad also rode a bike


----------



## Noodley (7 Jul 2013)

Oh, and I heard the first mention of "the heads of state of the tour de France" today from Sherwen - like hearing the first cuckoo of spring


----------



## Crackle (7 Jul 2013)

No mention of a faster cadence this year though.


----------



## oldroadman (7 Jul 2013)

Noodley said:


> They got all in am muddle today with the history of the Roche/Martin family trees: first we had the announcement that "Nicolas Roche is the son of Stephen Roche, who won the Tour in 1987"; then it was the revelation that "Dan Martin is the nephew of Stephen Roche, who won the Tour in 1987"; and then we had the real humdinger from Sherwen of "Dan Martin is Nicolas Roche's brother-in-law, err no I mean his cousin" - I think it was too much for him to work out what relation he'd be to Stephen Roche, winner of the Tour in 1987, if he was the cousin-in-law of his brother's dog, *so he then told us that Martin's dad also rode a bike*


 
Neil Martin, good bloke and a very handy bike rider indeed. Dan's mum is Maria, sister of Mr Roche senior.
hence he once had a GB licence, then decided to take out an Irish one (presumably dual nationality?) when he was already at quite a good level.


----------



## dragon72 (8 Jul 2013)

Liggett called an attack yesterday from someone called Nero Cantera. Must be new to the peloton.


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (9 Jul 2013)

So, on ITV4 as cyclists stop for roadside wazzes, commentator refers to natural breaks, immediately following this with ''You can see riders unloading their bottles.'' Is unloading your bottle a new euphemism?


----------



## Flying_Monkey (10 Jul 2013)

Just be thankful neither were commenting on the Tour of Qinghai Lake yesterday: the third stage was won by Tabriz Petrochemical's Pourseyedigolakhour Mirsamad, closely followed by teammate, Amir Kolahdozhagh.

I would love to hear them try to pronounce those names!


----------



## The Couch (10 Jul 2013)

Flying_Monkey said:


> Just be thankful neither were commenting on the Tour of Qinghai Lake yesterday: the third stage was won by Tabriz Petrochemical's Pourseyedigolakhour Mirsamad, closely followed by teammate, Amir Kolahdozhagh.
> 
> I would love to hear them try to pronounce those names!


I would love to hear anybody pronounce those names correctly


----------



## oldroadman (10 Jul 2013)

Moral: If you want to succeed as a pro, the longest name you can have should not exceed Abdujaparov, and be phonetically easy to pronounce.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (10 Jul 2013)

What's this Cad Elevens that Sean Kelly keeps going on abouts?


----------



## thom (10 Jul 2013)

Ligget just said something about the Olympic TT not having the same quality as the world championships because there are restrictions on the number of entries per country... 
Were there any top TTers not at the Olympics ? Depth would be less but the cream was all there innit !?


----------



## VamP (10 Jul 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> What's this Cad Elevens that Sean Kelly keeps going on abouts?


 
It's a mid morning snack for dopers.


----------



## oldroadman (11 Jul 2013)

thom said:


> Ligget just said something about the Olympic TT not having the same quality as the world championships because there are restrictions on the number of entries per country...
> Were there any top TTers not at the Olympics ? Depth would be less but the cream was all there innit !?


 
Complete tosh. Each of the "major" countries had their top riders competing. Other countries who are not so mainstream also had riders competing, and looking at their results should make anyone realise how good the best guys are. Is PL seriously saying the race was devalued when Spartacus, Tony Martin, Wiggo, Froome, were there, for example? I think it may be time for a graceful retirement.


----------



## Hont (11 Jul 2013)

Sherwen described Froome's TT position as not great aerodynamically yesterday. Yeah cos Sky don't spend any time working on that sort of thing do they? I'm sure just by looking at it, Paul, you could give them a few pointers.


----------



## Pete Ross (11 Jul 2013)

Paul Sherwen is the most boring person in the whole world. End of.


----------



## Crackle (11 Jul 2013)

I've given up. I can't even be bothered to type their tripe into this thread. Evans heart rate in the TT comment near made me spit my tea out, Liggett saying Boassen Hagen was on his radio or as Sherwen says, push to talk button, when he was clearly holding his shoulder...

Didn't they say Gilbert caused the crash, wasn't it someone in blue, they didn't call that right did they?


----------



## Rob3rt (11 Jul 2013)

Hont said:


> Sherwen described Froome's TT position as not great aerodynamically yesterday. Yeah cos Sky don't spend any time working on that sort of thing do they? I'm sure just by looking at it, Paul, you could give them a few pointers.


 

Actually Froome has only recently been in the wind tunnel for the 1st time according to an interview I listened to and/or read recently, which is rather surprising.


----------



## Auntie Helen (11 Jul 2013)

I hope that when David Millar retires he gets the job of commentating. He'd do a cracking job!


----------



## Doseone (12 Jul 2013)

Yesterday: "but you'll never catch Cavendish at this stage of the race"


----------



## tmesis (12 Jul 2013)

Doseone said:


> Yesterday: "but you'll never catch Cavendish at this stage of the race"


 

Perfect, wasn't it? It reminded me of an England v Uruguay friendly at Wembley just before the 1990 World Cup Finals. Uruguayan player shoots from 45 yards out and the commentator (Barry Davis?) has time to say "You'll never beat Shilton from that far ou..it's gone in!"


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (12 Jul 2013)

Auntie Helen said:


> I hope that when David Millar retires he gets the job of commentating. He'd do a cracking job!


Yes, I heard him doing a commentary last year (can't remember which race) and he was excellent. Clear voice, clear thinking and lots of racing insight. Markus Backstedt is pretty good too and I look forward to hearing him a bit more now that he's retired.


----------



## thom (12 Jul 2013)

deptfordmarmoset said:


> Yes, I heard him doing a commentary last year (can't remember which race) and he was excellent. Clear voice, clear thinking and lots of racing insight. Markus Backstedt is pretty good too and I look forward to hearing him a bit more now that he's retired.


World Championship road race I think - I agree, he is great. I suspect he has a good few other outlets for his talents to make commentary a full time thing but every once in a while would be great.


----------



## dellzeqq (14 Jul 2013)

'Contador and Nieve can are talking to each other - which they can do in their own language - Spanish!


----------



## Noodley (14 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> I've given up. I can't even be bothered to type their tripe into this thread.


 
It's so awful and frequent that it's almost a full-time job keeping up with their mistakes and bollox. Given that I know how much rubbish they spout about things I know, I have also started to disbelieve them about everything e.g. "Paul, do you know anything about that castle?"..."yes Phil, it was built in blah blah blah.." and I automatically think "I bet that's a load of incorrect bollox"


----------



## Auntie Helen (14 Jul 2013)

I'm getting doubly fed up with Paul Sherwen's verbal excess:

"just twenty three years of age" - what's wrong with "just 23 years old"

"Nairo Quintana is from the region of Blah..." Why not just "Nairo Quintana is from Blah"...

EVERY time he says it like that, longer than necessary.


----------



## thom (14 Jul 2013)

Auntie Helen said:


> I'm getting doubly fed up with Paul Sherwen's verbal excess:
> 
> "just twenty three years of age" - what's wrong with "just 23 years old"
> 
> ...


Part of the problem with their commentary is that they are switching between different feeds, giving similar fare to both broadcasts no doubt. As a result, they don't really have conversations with each other, they just state things and I think the style is a hangover from what they provide their US viewers. I can only imagine that speaking a slightly verbose version of English is thought to be perceived as an erudite device to cover up their lack of spontaneity.


----------



## User169 (14 Jul 2013)

Auntie Helen said:


> "Nairo Quintana is from the region of Blah..." Why not just "Nairo Quintana is from Blah"...
> .



They cant even get the Blah bit right. At one point today they had him as the "man from Bogota": he's from Tunja in the "Boyaca" region.


----------



## User169 (14 Jul 2013)

Alan Valverde!


----------



## gaz (14 Jul 2013)

Who's this richy froome they keep going on about? He seems to be doing well but i've never seen him.


----------



## youngoldbloke (15 Jul 2013)

Quintana's got the measure of him ...... there goes Froome


----------



## jarlrmai (15 Jul 2013)

gaz said:


> Who's this richy froome they keep going on about? He seems to be doing well but i've never seen him.


 
Part of the Sky Ghost Train


----------



## johnr (15 Jul 2013)

... Contador is just waiting to make his move... was the moment I knew Froome had got it won.


----------



## SomethingLikeThat (15 Jul 2013)

They are completely different to Eurosport commentary, granted they're not perfect either but at least they're having a proper conversation and answering people's questions rather than spouting off the same guff over and over again - naming riders etc.

Plus I like listening to Sean Kelly's voice.


----------



## eck (16 Jul 2013)

After the first week of this year's Tour, swearing and throwing things at the telly in frustration with that pair of clowns, we got Sky, with Eurosport, installed last just over a week ago. Sorry, ITV4, I just couldn't take it any more.  

A mate made a telling comment at the weekend that, compared with other commentators, Ligget and Sherwen seem disconnected from what's going on, it's as if they don't have the backstage pass any more and nobody on the inside really speaks to them now. Hmm...


----------



## Noodley (16 Jul 2013)

If I wasnae awa fae hame I'd be chappin' at yer door tae watch it


----------



## rich p (16 Jul 2013)

Noodley said:


> If I wasnae awa fae hame I'd be chappin' at yer door tae watch it


Good lord.


----------



## Crackle (16 Jul 2013)

rich p said:


> Good lord.


try Google translate


----------



## rich p (16 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> try Google translate


I did and it claimed it was English. 'Server error' I imagine.


----------



## eck (16 Jul 2013)

rich p said:


> I did and it claimed it was English. 'Server error' I imagine.


S'awricht, Ah ken whit he means.


----------



## thom (16 Jul 2013)

Joy of joys - visiting my Mum for a couple of days : she has Eurosport !


----------



## wakou (16 Jul 2013)

And today, they didn't disappoint....
"And there is the Basque flag, of Spain"
Ligget, for reasons known only to Ligget, explained that French for "pouring water over oneself" was "s'arrosser". The reply came "I know a better word in French for rosé.... red wine"
And in an inspired piece of lunacy, a mountain-top 10th castle Ligget: "restored in the the year 2xxx" Sherwin: "Then looks like they filled it with soil, so they could put a field on top of it"


----------



## dellzeqq (16 Jul 2013)

wakou said:


> And today, they didn't disappoint....
> *"And there is the Basque flag, of Spain"*
> Ligget, for reasons known only to Ligget, explained that French for "pouring water over oneself" was "s'arrosser". The reply came "I know a better word in French for rosé.... red wine"
> And in an inspired piece of lunacy, a mountain-top 10th castle Ligget: "restored in the the year 2xxx" Sherwin: "Then looks like they filled it with soil, so they could put a field on top of it"


I don't usually do this but.........

'Take your hat off to Team Saxo - they're using their two men to go one on one with Chris Froome'


----------



## Paulus (16 Jul 2013)

Today I heard when Phil Liggert was talking about Froome on the last climb.... "He has dosed his training"????


----------



## Pete Ross (17 Jul 2013)

All of a sudden there is no reaction. I did just observe him Phil and he wasn't there. On a day like this. Somewhere in the back of his/my mind. In this sport of professional cycle racing. Someone asked me, blah blah


----------



## theloafer (17 Jul 2013)

Noodley said:


> If I wasnae awa fae hame I'd be chappin' at yer door tae watch it


 
hey noodley get my eurosport free here... http://www.bestsportgo.tv/20130131/vv510a6315e2152626115287-493129.html


----------



## Crackle (17 Jul 2013)

Sherwin: Andy Schleck has just posted the 4th fastest time a the first check and he is a good climber and he's not a bad descender either.....
Me: spits tea out


----------



## Crackle (17 Jul 2013)

Ligett: Well as Valverde comes up this is going to be close but he's done it by a few seconds
Me: It's nearly a fekkin minute you Muppet, not a few seconds.
Ligett: Oh no, it's......nearly a minute, I was looking at the seconds


----------



## Crackle (17 Jul 2013)

Liggett: We've got a double dose of Alpe D'huez tomorrow....
Me: And we've got a double dope commentating on it.


----------



## SomethingLikeThat (18 Jul 2013)

'And he's crashed!'
'Actually no that's a replay'
'Oh'


----------



## VamP (18 Jul 2013)

Sounds like I should watch this on ITV.


----------



## SomethingLikeThat (18 Jul 2013)

I watch only for Boardman/Imlach/Boulting.


----------



## laurence (18 Jul 2013)

SomethingLikeThat said:


> I watch only for Boardman/Imlach/Boulting.


 
Boulting & Boardman have been a great double act. the Broom Wagon feature has been excellent, Chris is very good in that situation, he looks uncomfortable being a 'normal' presenter. plus, the two dummies aren't on that show, so double win.


----------



## pjm (18 Jul 2013)

is anyone else irritated by 'there's Contador dancing on the pedals', that one seems to come out every time there is a shot of him on every mountain stage every year


----------



## pjm (18 Jul 2013)

Contador is taking all kinds of risks on this descent


----------



## Hont (18 Jul 2013)

Liggett's love of the phrase "he's free to fly". I understand this one when a rider has dropped everyone and is on their own. But during a time trial it make no sense at all.

And where did Sherwen get the idea that Froome's nodding dog act is because it's more aerodynamic?


----------



## paulw77 (18 Jul 2013)

And WTF is a clavi*cule* ?


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (18 Jul 2013)

paulw77 said:


> And WTF is a clavi*cule* ?


véhicule = vehicle
clavicule = clavicle
Any fule...=.........


----------



## themosquitoking (18 Jul 2013)

deptfordmarmoset said:


> véhicule = vehicle
> clavicule = clavicle
> Any fule...=.........


 
Any fcle?????


----------



## Crackle (19 Jul 2013)

"Especially when it's a downhill descent, you can go down........"

What other sort have you come across, Paul?


----------



## Pete Ross (19 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> "Especially when it's a downhill descent, you can go down........"
> 
> What other sort have you come across, Paul?


 
There's the very wet dampness on the road sort.


----------



## junglegusset (20 Jul 2013)

Hont said:


> ...
> And where did Sherwen get the idea that Froome's nodding dog act is because it's more aerodynamic?



Glad it's not just me questioning that one.


----------



## Noodley (20 Jul 2013)

Liggett claimed today that Rodriguez had ridden away from Froome to allow him his moment of glory alone in front of the crowds, and seconds later that Froome had let Quintana and Rodriguez away to let them have their 'moments'...what a lot of hairy old dog turd that twat speaks!


----------



## Doseone (20 Jul 2013)

"Valverde will be dropping back in to 4th and his team mate Kreuziger 5th if things stay as they are on the road now."


----------



## gavroche (20 Jul 2013)

I like Phil Liggett, I think he is to the TDF what Murray Walker was to F1.


----------



## Noodley (20 Jul 2013)

gavroche said:


> I like Phil Liggett, I think he is to the TDF what Murray Walker was to F1.


 
Nurse, I think he has sunstroke...


----------



## rich p (20 Jul 2013)

gavroche said:


> I like Phil Liggett, I think he is to the TDF what Murray Walker was to F1.


 
You're possibly right. Another commentator who went on well past his sell-by date like Dan Maskell.


----------



## ayceejay (20 Jul 2013)

rich p said:


> You're possibly right. Another commentator who went on well past his sell-by date like Dan Maskell.


ooh I say!


----------



## rich p (20 Jul 2013)

ayceejay said:


> ooh I say!


 
Ooooh, he's fallen over, I do hope he hasn't hurt himself


----------



## Saluki (20 Jul 2013)

Did they something about Jens Voight being 41 but turning 42 as he reaches the summit? Or did I wildly miss-hear?


----------



## Noodley (20 Jul 2013)

Saluki said:


> Did they something about Jens Voight being 41 but turning 42 as he reaches the summit? Or did I wildly miss-hear?


 
They mentioned about 3000 times that he was 41, and that if he got a contract to ride next year that he'd be 42 then. I imagine if he does not get a contract for next season that he will forever be 41.


----------



## Saluki (20 Jul 2013)

Noodley said:


> They mentioned about 3000 times that he was 41, and that if he got a contract to ride next year that he'd be 42 then. I imagine if he does not get a contract for next season that he will forever be 41.


I wish they would shut up about him being 41, they'll give the guy a complex at this rate 
I am beginning to wonder if Sherwin & Liggett have dementia as they repeat themselves more than my Gran did.


----------



## Crackle (20 Jul 2013)

Do you think we'll have another thread like this next year or can we live in hope?


----------



## mr_hippo (20 Jul 2013)

Has anyone noticed that Ligget has demoted Lance Armstrong? For years, it was Mr Armstrong but now just Armstrong.
I cannot remember the commentator nor circumstances but the phrase 'It's curtains for Karpets' has stuck in my memory.
Many years ago, helicopter shot of an aqueduct with 3 man standing on the parapet, Duffield implored one of them to jump and one of them did! Duffield's reaction was a classic. Fortunately the men were bungee jumping.


.


----------



## Noodley (20 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Do you think we'll have another thread like this next year or can we live in hope?


 
I live in hope that you dinnae start one...or is that not what you were meaning?


----------



## SomethingLikeThat (21 Jul 2013)

ITV could save some money just having the others commentate as well as do the analysis/introduction.


----------



## raindog (21 Jul 2013)

Seriously, is anyone good at maths? (I'm crap) Just wondering what the odds are against Cav getting five in row are? They must be really, really enormous, even without taking into consideration Kittel's and Greipel's great form, and the fact that their trains are functioning better than Quickstep's.


----------



## Noodley (21 Jul 2013)

Best odds at present according to oddschecker:

Cavendish 10/11
Kittel 3/1
Greipel 5/1


----------



## T.M.H.N.E.T (21 Jul 2013)

Apparently this year is the first Cav has won less than 5 stages.

2008 and 2012 didn't happen then? Swapped to Eurosport then realised it has Sean Kelly.

*sells his Sean Kelly signatured Vitus


----------



## smutchin (21 Jul 2013)

Apparently, "Peter Sagan's beard is green to match his yellow jersey."

Thanks, Phil.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (21 Jul 2013)

"I'd forgotten about this until I remembered"

No fuggin shoot!...


----------



## Pete Ross (21 Jul 2013)

well let's not forget Phil...


----------



## smutchin (21 Jul 2013)

"The Seine... one of the most famous rivers, if not the most famous river, in Europe." - Phil "Baedeker" Liggett


----------



## Crackle (21 Jul 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> "I'd forgotten about this until I remembered"
> 
> No fuggin s***!...


I was just about to type that one up.

It was closely followed by "....Marcel Kettel has a superb lead out man in the form of Tom Veelers........who is out of the race now......"


----------



## smutchin (21 Jul 2013)

"We're looking at a picture of the sun about to go down..."

<TV shows picture of full moon>


----------



## Flying Dodo (21 Jul 2013)

Phil - "Paris, where the Tour de France has always ended". 

Er.....no.


----------



## Pete Ross (21 Jul 2013)

I think, but only very occasionally that is, Cos I don't really give a toss, that we should rid the world of the boring beyond words, Paul Sherwin spelt wrong ? who really gives a fark what his name is.


----------



## Saluki (21 Jul 2013)

We had a swig of beer every time Phil or Paul said something stupid. We are a bit tipsy and off to bed. We might be lightweights


----------



## smutchin (22 Jul 2013)

I just remembered something I should have mentioned earlier...

Anyone who was watching the ITV coverage on Saturday may have noticed Boardman and Imlach corpsing as the cameras cut to them at the end of the stage. Boardman revealed in the podcast that this was because he'd been making notes of all the "interesting" variations on riders' names Phil'n'Paul had provided during the stage - my favourite being Boll Mauke - and he made the mistake just before they went live on air of glancing down at the desk and his notes catching his eye...


----------



## KittyJay (22 Jul 2013)

Was it just me or did the supposed "night finish" they kept going on and on about yesterday, just look like the sun had gone in a bit,rather than plunged the riders into exciting pitch darkness ? It wasn't dark, no matter how many times they said it, it just wasn't! But did that stop them drivelling on about how much the riders will enjoy the "special treat of riding in the dark" or some such balls? 
"Twilight", my arse.


----------



## MisterStan (22 Jul 2013)

KittyJay said:


> Was it just me or did the supposed "night finish" they kept going on and on about yesterday, just look like the sun had gone in a bit,rather than plunged the riders into exciting pitch darkness ? It wasn't dark, no matter how many times they said it, it just wasn't! But did that stop them drivelling on about how much the riders will enjoy the "*special treat of riding in the dark*" or some such balls?
> "Twilight", my arse.


Try doing a full winter of commutes and then tell me it's a 'special treat' riding in the dark.


----------



## Andrew Br (22 Jul 2013)

KittyJay said:


> Was it just me or did the supposed "night finish" they kept going on and on about yesterday, just look like the sun had gone in a bit,rather than plunged the riders into exciting pitch darkness ? It wasn't dark, no matter how many times they said it, it just wasn't! But did that stop them drivelling on about how much the riders will enjoy the "special treat of riding in the dark" or some such balls?
> "Twilight", my arse.


 
I was very disappointed by the lack of cutting edge hub-dynamos.

.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (22 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Do you think we'll have another thread like this next year or can we live in hope?


 

If you need a top up between Tours, there's pages of Lig's shite gathered together in a small corner of the internet.

Link deleted


----------



## Crackle (22 Jul 2013)

threebikesmcginty said:


> If you need a top up between Tours, there's pages of Lig's s***e gathered together in a small corner of the internet.
> 
> deleted link


 
Got a Trojan warning on that site, unfortunately


----------



## Saluki (22 Jul 2013)

Just been watching last nights highlights on the recorder thingy - it was either that or corrie - and I am pretty sure that Phil said that we were getting a 360 degree view of the tomb of the unknown shoulder and then later he called it 'the tomb of the unknown sholdier' There was definitely an extra 'h' in there.


----------



## threebikesmcginty (22 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Got a Trojan warning on that site, unfortunately


 

Nowt on my lappy, mind you the anti-virus stuff is managed by our I 'turn-it-off-and-turn-it-on-again' T department.

Edit, no you were right, I just ignored the pop up warning, terminates connection automatically though so no harm done, I hope 

Link deleted.


----------



## rich p (22 Jul 2013)

Crackle said:


> Got a Trojan warning on that site, unfortunately


No, I'm Cancellara


----------



## rich p (22 Jul 2013)

Saluki said:


> Just been watching last nights highlights on the recorder thingy - it was either that or corrie - and I am pretty sure that Phil said that we were getting a 360 degree view of the tomb of the unknown shoulder and then later he called it 'the tomb of the unknown sholdier' There was definitely an extra 'h' in there.


You probably heard right - Liggett doesn't know his arse from his shoulder


----------



## thom (22 Jul 2013)

rich p said:


> No, I'm Cancellara


I'm Cancellara !


----------



## deptfordmarmoset (22 Jul 2013)

rich p said:


> You probably heard right - Liggett doesn't know his arse from his shoulder


I think it's more that he doesn't know his Arc from his shoulder....

Oh yes, and I heard his shoulder-shouldier too.


----------



## Saluki (23 Jul 2013)

deptfordmarmoset said:


> I think it's more that he doesn't know his Arc from his shoulder....
> 
> Oh yes, and I heard his shoulder-shouldier too.


So glad, I thought that it was just me


----------



## Noodley (16 Aug 2013)

View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QEcXZUd2hM


----------



## smutchin (16 Aug 2013)

That is almost too funny.


----------



## Noodley (16 Aug 2013)

Another one: I am a "cyclist"


View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47cGzu6-q40


Made me chuckle


----------



## thom (16 Aug 2013)

Noodley said:


> Another one: I am a "cyclist"
> 
> 
> View: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47cGzu6-q40
> ...



You should make one Noodles : I am a "Nobber"


----------



## smutchin (16 Aug 2013)

"I can not believe you don't know what a time trial is."


----------



## Noodley (16 Aug 2013)

thom said:


> You should make one Noodles : I am a "Nobber"


 
Ohh, that's so tempting


----------

